STARLIGHT SERENADE

Shifted.

2009-11-08T12:52:00.000+08:00

I'll shut this down.

EVERYONE GO TO HTTP://LOVEINACAN.TUMBLR.COM

THANKS(:

numbed.

2009-10-16T21:33:00.002+08:00

Numbed by pain,
can barely feel no more.

It never rains, it pours.
My cramp problem is back,
vomited at JP yesterday,
it was disgusting.

When I came home, my grandma scolded me for using her blanket
and even said vomiting is my own business.
She made it seem like it was my fault.

Hello, its not like I want to vomit and feel so much pain every time.
Who's the one that doesn't want to bring me to the gynae again for check up. (MUM)

Okay, fine, no one cares in the family.

And then today, I heard my uncle (dad's elder bro) has kidney failure.
No one is going to donate a kidney.
It'll be hard to find a donor out there.
He's the only breadwinner, and he being on dialysis is definitely going to take a toil on his job.

Nothing is good,
my tablet charger is spoilt,
reason why I can type this is thanks to Jia Yi for helping me charge.

I dont know why,
I feel void of feeling.
I feel numb.
I don't know what to feel, there's nothing to feel anymore.
And, my tastebuds seem to be dying on me.
Everything tastes the same bland way.

But who cares?
Do you?

i wish.

it's killing me,

2009-10-04T12:04:00.003+08:00

The gap that has widen far too much,
I can't see the starting and there doesnt seem to be an end.

The pain and hurt I carry inside,
with tears and fear,
I run.

I chase those images,
the memories that still remain.

Each day, the fear doubles.
The images get blurry,
the things I can remember reduce day after day.

Helplessness takes over,
no matter how much I try,
those images wont return.

I struggle,
I fall,
I force myself to get up and stay strong.

With the bruises I hide inside,
the undeniable hole that I can't repair.
I toss and turn in bed, clutching the blanket so tight.
No warmth seems available,
just cold wrapping around me.

Just like how she endangers her life to get back those voices in her head and to see those images flash by,
I think excessively in the day, hoping those pictures come back to me in my dreams.

But now, even dreams scare me.
I thought I saw,
and went to search frantically in the crowd,
but, it probably was an illusion.

I don't know why in the world I started this nightmare,
causing myself to suffer in this state.
It fears me to see my phone go quiet just after 2 replies,
it fears me to not know whats in that head anymore,
it fears me cause it seems that only I care,
it fears me,
it kills me.

Sometimes I wish something really bad would happen,
then I'll feel so much care from people.
If I really somehow need to get admitted to hospital,
take my phone and call the 7 speed dial numbers.
I ranked them, it shows how important those people are to me.

from mylifeisaverage.com

2009-10-02T21:11:00.002+08:00

Today, my dad was driving me home from school. We were at a red light, between two barber shops. One had a sign which read, "$5 hair cuts." The other had a sign which said, "We fix $5 hair cuts." MLIA

oday, I was at a stoplight when I noticed the car in front of me had feet coming out from the bottom. I sat in amazement of a real Flintstones car for 2 minutes before I realized there was a guy on a motorcycle in front of the car. MLIA.

Today, I was at the mall and just before I was about to walk inside, I noticed there was a homeless man standing on the sidewalk. I read his sign. It said 'spare change for a bigger sign to impress hot homeless chicks'...I gave him all the change in my wallet. MLIA

Today, I was at the grocery store in the bakery section when I heard a little girl hyperactively telling her mother what kind of cake she wanted for her birthday. After going through the catalog, she suddenly and loudly demanded a Hannah Montana cake, to which her mother replied, "But you don't even like Hannah Montana!" The little girl nonchalantly responded, "I know, I just want to eat her face." Our youth is doing just fine. MLIA.

Today, my friends found out I had a twin brother. They asked how old he was. MLIA

Today, we had to do a presentation on rivalry in English. All the really preppy girls did it over sports. I did mine over Batman versus the Joker. Guess who got more applause from the guys? MLIA.

Today, I shouted "Hey look! I'm INVISIBLE!" at people walking past me when they weren't paying attention. When they turned to look I pretend to try and find where the voice came from too so that they would be confused. It worked. MLIA

credits from mylifeisaverage.com

its really funny sometimes.

DEAR JESUS,

2009-10-02T20:42:00.002+08:00

DEAR JESUS,
Please grant Amanda her good nights' sleep.
Stop her from waking up at 3/4/5 am for nothing.
Put her to sleep till 9am, please, I'm begging you.
I'm dying from this stupid zombie life, not getting enough sleep and all.
my grandma doesn't want to give a sleeping pill to me.
Jesus, I pray you stop me from waking up.
My eye bags are so huge and I'm so used to feeling the crown of my head heavy, without enough sleep.
This is so gross, I just want to sleep like a log like how I used to be able to.
PLEASE ANSWER MY PRAYER,
SPRAY SLEEPING GAS IN MY ROOM TONIGHT OR SOMETHING KAY.

on her knees,
it's killing me.

PS. Prayers needed or some sleeping tips thanks.

For my favourite elder brother's pleasure.(:

2009-09-17T22:14:00.004+08:00

hahahhaha, this is for Jun Ze, he keeps pestering me to update so here I am.
Have been busy la, with studies, house comm and all.
My mind has been really preoccupied too.

ANNDDD, I REALLY LIKE ANTM CYCLE 12.
Courtnie, London, Fo are like sooooooo prettttyyyyy.
But flipside of ANTM: the verbal fights.
so B****Y

ahh, choir ended so late today.
my shoulders hurt.

ANNDD everyone's saying did you rebond your hairr?
I'm like no, i just tie it like straight down, so my hair seems straight
hahah, I actually tied two today.
my neck was kinda irritated by the hair I think.
hahha.
oh wells.

I saw Uncle Ian today again(:
told him about the wei cheng and duncan thing
I think he went to told them off.
wahahha, power of having an awesome cool, uncle friend who is a teacher and liverpool fan and Christian(:

Oh, today had minor cramps in chinese class.
I did a quick prayer and felt lots better(:
thats why I say, my Daddy in heaven is better than panadol(:

pictures from icanread.tumblr.com and wordboner.com:

with love.

A fat me.

2009-08-24T18:44:00.001+08:00

Last night, we bought takeaways from Yew Tee Point.
I bought BK.
And I'm kinda angry with the cashier.
I said I want a mushroom swiss meal.
And then I saw that it was like more expensive than usual but I say anything.
Then when I got home, I realised she gave me the one with 2 meat patties.
Gosh, it felt terrible eating that.
I didn't like the fact that there were 2 meat patties.
And I took forever to finish.
I was really full after that.
THANK GOD THEY'RE RESUMING CHOIR RUNS THIS WEEK.
If not, it's no surprise my weighing machine breaks.

Went to queensway to buy a pair of FBT shorts and a school skirt.
My school skirts are really small and I wear them really high.
Got fed up so I decided to buy a bigger one.
Its so freaky-ingly long.
I've already asked my ah gong to give my gu gu help me alter.
HEH.
I really like my shorts too.
Addition to my black, dark blue,red and pink collection. (:

I drank sugarcane today too.
Though I think those at hawker centres taste better.
Haven't been to a hawker centre in a while.
CHAR KWAY TEOWWWW.
(dang. am I such a glutton. noooooooooo)

Jonas daddy is away at OBS.
Hahha, hope to hear interesting storiess.

AND, congrats Wan Lin And Jun Kai.
You guys are finally,
BAPTISED. :DDDD
(HAHAHAH, GEEZ, THAT SOUNDED LIKE A MARRIAGE CONGRATULATORY MESSAGE.)
I wonder when I'll be baptised.
Serena said she wanted to talk to me about it, but there's never time.

ANDD, I think Jun Ze has finally accepted the fact that he's elder brotherly.
He called my little sis that day.
So HAPPPY :D
FINALLY HAVE A NICE ELDER BROTHER.
Always so jealous of all those girls who have nice elder brothers who stand up for them or help them in those drama serials.
Hahaha.

PS. I'm typing in better english, cause Kar Yee said that my english on my blog is rather good so I must type in proper english.
我不要辜负好朋友。:D

Dreams galore.

2009-08-23T15:29:00.000+08:00

I don't know why, but I've been having really weird dreams.

Recently, I dreamt that I was on this huge cruise.
I was standing on the deck with some people I didn't know.
Everyone was quite worried and hysteric, for there was this elderly couple swimming in between the cruise and a small yacht.
They were trying to swim to the yacht.
People on the cruise were like screaming, asking them to come back for they wouldn't make it to the yacht and it was dangerous in the ocean.
For there were predators.
But they insisted on returning to their children on the yacht.
Suddenly, I kinda had this X-ray underwater vision.
I saw underwater that there was this huge whale swimming towards them.
There was nothing I could do.
And in went the couple, into the whale's mouth.
And water shot out of the whale's blow hole, splashing water to the people on the cruise.

Its freaky, to have another "water" dreams.
I often have dreams that are water based.
Went to dreammoods.com to get interpretations of my water dreams
"To see water in your dream, symbolizes your unconscious and your emotional state of mind. Water is the living essence of the psyche and the flow of life energy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment. If the water is calm, clear, then it signifies that you are in tune with your spirituality. It denotes serenity, peace of mind, and rejuvenation. If you are splashed by water, then it represents your need to be revitalized and more expressive"

"To dream that you are underwater, suggests that you are feeling overcome with emotions and are in need of greater control in your life. You may be in over your head regarding some situation.

To dream that you are breathing underwater, represents a retreat back into the womb. You want to return to a state where you were dependent and free from responsibilities. Perhaps you are feeling helpless, unable to fulfill your own needs and caring for yourself.� Alternatively, you may be submerged in your emotions. "

I have dreamt that I can breathe underwater before and that I was underwater before.
And I guess I do feel helpless at times.

AND, I think I need to get winter socks.
My toes are always icy cold when I wake up.
Should get those really happy colourful ones.
Normal ankle socks are too thin.

Praise the Lord that I passed Biology and A math.
It wasn't a good pass, but I'll work harder.
E math. ):
Must do intensive already.
realise that I did worse in e math than a math.
lalalalala, i'm such a screwed kid.

I need to save moneyyyy.
After paying for NACLI shirts, I'll be very broke.
I want to get money from my mum to buy more FBTs and new school skirt.
Running out on shorts and my skirts are so small I have to wear them so high.

~~I want frappe.~~

I want to get an ez-link card cover, so I don't need to be afraid people see my photo and laugh.
Cause I don't tap my whole wallet, I always take out the card and put in my chest pocket.
I wanted to go lot 1 buy before tuition but my mum insisted my dad take my to tuition.
Spoil my hopes.

~~how uncaring,how repulsive,how hateful you sound.~~

I know I shouldn't have opened my mouth, but then there won't be this juicy story.

2009-08-18T22:07:00.000+08:00

I was with my junior on the train at JE. saw this group of malay and 2 chinese boys from green ridge. 3 of them had seats and 1 was sitting on the lap of another. then dont know why, they left the cabin and I took 1 seat cause I was tired
*then after that, they came back
*and stood beside the glass panel.

*then 1 of the malays were like that was my seat.
*i ignore.
*then he even knock on the glass.
*i ignore.

*then the other malay guy spoke

*he was like my friend (pointing to this chinese guy) ask how old are you.
*then I was like, you all in shorts right
*He: oh, you upper sec ar.
*me: yah

*he: sec what? sec 3, 4 or 5
*me: my school don't have sec 5
*he: so sec what.
*me: 3
*then i heard a malay say, I retained!
*i was like -.- thinking so fake.

*then the malay told the chinese I'm sec 3, not for you la.
*then the malay say the chinese want my number
*then I say for what
*he asked again.
*so i tell him call 999.

*then he said my friend want me to tell you he admires you
*then i said, oh ,thank him for me

*he was like seriously
*me: I'm serious too.
*he: but you laughing until like that
*then I give him the I cant help it face.
*then i talked to my junior , ignore them

*then they heard we alighting at cck. then they also. then when the train went into station, they were like shovelling
*trying to push the guy nearer or whatever. then this woman behind was like excuse me.

1. I can get so attituded, mean and witty?
2. I attract unnecessary attention from junior guys?
3. I can fit in all secondary levels ranging from 1-5?
4. I guess I wouldn't have dared talked like that if they were older. but they deserved it?
5. are chinese generally more shy? C in chinese doesn't only stand for cowards but also for courageous right?
6. With the courage or not, no positive outcome anyway.
7. Don't younger guys back off when they know the opposite is older? I thought in sec schools, there aren't 姐弟恋s？

biology e-learning.
dang.

Support!

2009-08-18T11:11:00.000+08:00

Hello.

Since I always search for quotes,
I've created a site at xanga to share them with you guys.

will update when I'm free.
Do support yeah.

http://pinkmasquerade.xanga.com

Please comment (:

binge binge binge.

2009-08-17T10:06:00.000+08:00

When things go wrong, bad things come in a chain.
Firstly, I had to read about that stupid article in the papers in the morning which practically scolded all the big 4 managers and that was really insulting to say that sunderland and portsmouth can come to Anfield and say this is so bloody easy. WHAT THE. seriously.

Then, the A math thing.

I didn't feel good at all.
Decided to eat.
Rather binge cause I wasn't hungry at all.
I had a slice of keish, a yakult[ and when I tried to throw it into the bin of my studyroom, it bounced out. (!!!!!) ] ;a tau sar piah and a cup of milo.
Only difference is I don't feel guilty or want to exercise a lot today.
Though I might later.
Haven't done so in a really long time.

Then, e-learning really sucks.
They made us read freaking LONGGGGGGGGG articles on LKY, Mother theresa and maha gandi for lit.
SERIOUSLY.
All they wanted us to do was to write 2 paragraphs on what leader characteristics kahu,koro and nanny flowers have. -.-
e-learning is so time consuming I swear.
URGH.

THEN, I had to watch such a torturing match.
Liverpool was so off-form!
Their positions were really bad.
It was so loose.
And the defence was like how easy to penetrate.
They were all tumbling around literally.
With poor carragher's head being hit with Skrtel.
I feel sad that they got injured, but it just showed the lack of communication.
The mid-field wasn't sending the balls to the forwards.
They were like defending more than half the time.
If not for reina, even more goals would have been in by spurs.
Benayoun should have come in earlier to put the game into aggressive mode.
I mean, I love liverpool with my whole life, but you guys really disappointed me this time.
Without that penalty shot by gerrard, the score would be an even uglier 2-0.
Liverpool, PLEASE rectify the problem.
we're the first big four to lose, and we can't afford that if we are to win the title this season.
Let's go, go, go.
No more wasting time yeah.
Benitez, jia you.

So, I went to sleep without a smile.
And of course with such a bad evening, comes a bad dream.
So I had this nightmare that my house was infested my these bugs that had a brown head and white body.
They were everywhere and the big ones can fly.
The spray didn't help.
I hate insects.
Officially.
They are of not use at all.
Just here on earth to irritate people.
I WANNA KILL THEM.
Even lizards are better, they EAT INSECTS.

Had to wake up early for e-learning even though I slept at 1.
Had like 7 hours of sleep.
So gonna nap later.
If possible.
Screw e-learning.

Quote:
He said “You know, blind people could be considered lucky.
They don’t have to see the bad, ugly and the pain in the world.”
I looked at him, took in what he had said. And told him this
“But, then again they wouldn’t be able to see all the good
and the beautiful things that exist around them
that have the power to override the bad.”
He looked at me and smiled.
“That’s true. They would never be able to lay eyes on you.”

http://lovethose--quotes.xanga.com/

Sweet much.

I need hope, and I need God to tell me its going to be okay.

2009-08-16T20:50:00.000+08:00

Although these don't give me the hope I need, but its very pleasing.

"A little girl was dying of cancer and her younger brother had a match for the bone marrow she needed. The doctors told him it was a matter of life and death. After he had the surgery, he asked the doctors how long he had to live. He thought if he gave his bone marrow to let his sister live he would die but he did it anyway."

"One of my classmates in high school had leukemia, and he was really depressed after his first round of chemo when he came to school with no hair. When they found out about it, all 70+ members of the varsity football team shaved their heads too. Their yearbook picture is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. "

"I suffer from severe depression. I try to keep that part of me away from friends because I'm worried they'll judge me for it. After revealing this to a dear friend via email, he went silent. I went to bed feeling worse than ever. Early the next morning, there was a knock at the door. He had driven all night to see me, just to give me a hug. "

"Today, I saw a boy asking an elderly lady if he could help carry her groceries to her car. He was 7."

"Today on the bus, a man got up to give an old woman his seat. He was even older than she was. "

"Today, I went on an airplane by myself for the first time. I have an extreme fear of heights and I'm only 15. As the flight was about to take off a flight attendant noticed i was shaking and gripping the seat. She took the empty seat next to me and held my hand until we were safely in the air and then brought me a brownie"

"Today is my birthday. A couple months ago I was attacked by a dog that left horrendous scars on my face. My boyfriend made a book that says "You're the most beautiful thing I have ever seen" in over 100 different languages. "

From www.givesmehope.com and http://modelstatusxquotes.xanga.com/

I need hope.
Desperately.
I need hope to see that my studies would get better.
I received the email that I have to do a re-common test for a math and I need to work extremely hard for EOYs.
I probably border line passed, again.
I was expecting myself to do better.
If my a math is this way, my e math is probably dead.

I need hope to see that things are going to get better.
That I'll be able to go to a good JC.
I'm like studying, but its fruitless.
I don't know why.
I guess more effort needs to come in.
But its tough.
I don't know what to do to rectify things.
Do more?
No matter how I study for bio, the questions come out different.
No matter how I study for E math, they twist the questions so cruelly that I can't apply.
Where are the results that I need to glorify God and have a good testimony.

My life is so screwed period.

I'm suffering from parental problems.
I'm suffering from bad results.
I'm suffering from emotional pain.
I'm suffering from not having my own happy story.

Everyone seems to have one to tell.

" oh, I improved in ___ subject"
"oh, I went out with my friends to catch ______ the movie"
"oh, cell was great we learnt ____"
"oh, I went to church with my family/ I help my mum at children service."
And dramas just love to cut in more with all the couples happily ever afters and wonderful life.

I'm just so tired, worn out of being the one looking happy all the time.
I need a break to just be emotional.
To tell the truth, I've become more sensitive now.
I cry a whole lot more.
During shows even.
I never was this weak.
Shows seldom made me cry.

I need God in my life more.
I feel desperate all of a sudden.
Cause I realise, me fighting alone isn't enough.

What they said at church is so true, without God, I'm nothing.

They tell you to dream big.
I think they'll just cut more.
When you realise with the state you are in now, you probably won't get that wonderful future of living in a condo with your husband and drive a car to work at a pretty place.

won't someone just tell me this?

"and every time you feel like crying, i'm gonna try and make you laugh. and if i can't, if it just hurts too bad, then we will wait for it to pass. and I will keep you company through those days so long and black."

won't someone just give me a hug and tell me, don't cry, its going to be alright.

burning body burns

2009-07-31T21:41:00.001+08:00

I really love alliteration man.

Anw, today's my first day of MC.
Has been quite a crazy day.
I mostly read my Bible,rested by lying in bed, watched tv, on the com and did A math and a little of my hcl assessment book.

my temperatures were crazily high earlier.
Highest in the afternoon was about 40 degrees.
I ate both types of fever medicine my doc gave.
Though 1 of them I was only supposed to eat only twice a day.
But obviously it was a right choice cause it pushed my fever all the way down to normal temp by evening.

Wanna thank everyone for their concern on facebook.
Even Damian's comment was fierce but caring with the "amanda. get off friggin facebook and start resting or imma hand your ass back to ya"
hahah.

Don't worry about me, I'm free from fever.
Just took my temp.
Its like now 36.1. -.-
even lower than normal.
But my saliva tastes weird for some reason.
Hope it doesn't lead to anything.

Today also checked out Liverpool's new signings, glen jonhson and philipp degan.
Cant wait to see them on pitch.
I think Philipp degan looks good though he's older than Torres.
By a little.

why don't you wear your heart on your sleeve.

toilet trips. -.-

2009-07-29T16:28:00.000+08:00

I hate days when I get stomachaches and need to go to the toilet several times.
Like today, I went once at redhill mrt toilet, I believe thrice at school and once at lot 1.
Before I finally cleared and felt better.
GEEZ.
why do I get such constipation problems.
Either I 'inherited' from my mum or I haven't been eating enough veg.

oh, I think I'm going to fail bio test.
DIE.
I mean, there're only 3 passes from my half of the class.
Sighs.
I think biology is hard to score.
Dang, everything to me is like hard to score. Maths, science, humanities.
Needing some S.O.S.
Geez. I'm already studying quite hard, I think.

But, English oral was good.
I think I was too naggy when describing the picture that the teacher stopped me before I could have a conclusion.
Had quite a good conversation with her.
The teacher took chinese lit in JC.
I'm like "wow, I don't think I can do it" (thoughts in my head)

Oh, chinese test shouldn't turn out any finer.
Lao Shi said that people got 0 for the cloze and MCQ compre.
my life is so ________.

Thank God A math test has been postponed to friday.
Chem test to do tmr.
Mole concept KILLS. bloody.

Gee, being in a girls' school is making me uncouth.
I was sitting with my legs on the chair and other unglam sitting positions during chem SPA.
In class, its also a habit to rest 1 leg on the other, like those kopitiam uncles.
Geez.
why am I so unglam.

And chem SPA was screwed today.
Did the experiment twice wrongly.
Mostly my fault.
then afterwards spilled stuff too.
was like jumping in anger. literally.

Btw, I think the 5-0 win against the singapore team was awesome.
I mean, liverpool already gave SO much way.
放水 until the whole stadium can flood please.
But Singapore couldn't deliver, so just give the glory to the ones who deserve it.
And I don't understand why the S team had to keep complaining that no one cheered for them.
I mean like duh.
Obviously people cheer for the awesome team that flew all the way here to play?
Seriously, if S team were better, you might have won over some hearts.
But sorry, ain't that case.
I REALLY want to go to those open air areas where many liverpool fans would gather and watch a big game.
Super great atmosphere!
Can cheer all I want.

I had two realisations recently.
1) Liverpool has always been really close to the heart. Them being in Singapore or not, they're always taking a place in my heart. Really, but of course, just seeing them at Clarke Quay was enough to make me go really gaga over the whole team. Really LOVE this liverpool batch mannnn. ( DON'T WANT ALONSO TO GO)

2) Its so disgraceful to say player names wrongly.
I was on 307 yesterday evening.
Heard 2 guys talking about the liverpool game.
They wanted to talk about Krisztián Németh but didn't know his name. This one still forgivable.
Then one guy wanted to say that Dirt Kuyt was very good for he aided in 3 goals.
First guy pronounced wrongly.
Second guy corrected. EVEN WORSE.
Ended up Dirt Kuyt's name was Dirt CUTE.
I'M LIKE GEEEEEZZZZ. SO DISGRACEFUL PLEASE.
I REALLY FELT LIKE TURNING OVER AND TELL THEM HOW IT'S SAID.
Please, if you don't know, don't say.
Other fans around might just throw a punch your way for making fun of players' names.
AND, its good to be smart, but don't act smart.
Its not cute, thanks.

And YAY, uncle Ian.
He said that next time I want to go adidas to buy liverpool merchandise, tell him.
Then he'll lend me his member's card to get 30% discount.
hahah, he should be my god-dad or something.
We can go hoo-ha watching liverpool mannnn.

ANDD, I saw two guys at the lot 1 bus stop today.
Both wearing singlets.
1 was too skinny and the other one too plump.
Both looked so weird.
I hereby declare that singlets should be worn by guys who are muscular and have good build like Torres.

AND BTW, I don't know why I hear people talk like nick chuan nowadays.
Mr Keong used "champion" quite a few times today.
And the guys who got Kuyt's name wrongly said "zai"
What's this man.
Nick chuan's spirit is following me and possessing the people around.
hahahaha.

Disgusted.

2009-07-20T17:34:00.003+08:00

Was so disgusted just now.
I was on 307, on the way home.
at the regent stop before the stop which I alight,several regent people (majority guys) boarded.
They were like talking and like shifting seats from one place to another.
Quite annoying but it didn't bother me at first.
So, at the traffic light, I stood up and walked to the door area.

And then, I heard a cat call(you know those disgusting whistles that guys make. so A.A) made by someone at the back.
Refused to look back; just stared out of the door and drank my ice milo.
Then I heard conversations, I guess now my bag became the talking topic or something.
Kinda dumb.
Then I heard someone say : Why so kan chiong? (something like that)

whatever.
seriously.
Hate it when stuff like that happen.
GET A LIFE.

Tomorrow's racial harmony!
Gonna wear white shirt and shorts tmr and then wrap the sari cloth around.
hahah, I think we'll look like ms singapore with the sash, right kar yee?

OH, I saw Hong Jun Yang and Candyce Toh at BPP yesterday.
My family was eating Cafe Cartel for dinner when we saw them.
Heh.
They're a couple. (!)
Getting married soon(!)
Hahah, my mum says Hong Jun Yang isn't very goodlooking.
I kinda have a different stand.
okay, bimbo statement here. (once, I turned my head and looked directly at him in his face, eye contact. awkward)

hahah, okay. gotta study
bye.

Instilled with passion.

2009-07-19T15:40:00.002+08:00

Went to school in the morning for a house meeting yesterday.
It was quite redundant, we should have met tmr afternoon or something.
But in any case, it gave me a chance to step out of the house.
I bought the seventeen mag and it gave me several places to buy ribbon accessories.
Yay seventeen!
I bought a purple small comb to put in my bag for use outside and bought a body mist which smells nice.
I don't have to be stinky anymore.
And Kar yee wouldn't have to always lend me hers. hahah.
I love my body mist cause it looks pretty and glam outside.

Yesterday's sermon was on passion, and it set me thinking.
What is my passion?
I don't seem to know, cause I seem to like quite a lot of stuff.
Singing, dancing(though I really suck at it), sports like sprinting,table tennis,badminton; there seems to be so many little things that I like.
What's the one I love?
(I don't know and I want to know!)

Oh, and we sang Serena a belated birthday song yesterday.
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY SERENA!
You've been a really awesome cell group leader(:

oh, and thanks Jun Ze for your peanut erasers, they are really cute. :D

Went back to malaysia to visit grandparents and have dinner with them after church.
I bet all of you are like O.O now, since I left church at like 5?!
Dad kinda persecuted me in the car when we were driving there.
Told me not to go around telling people about Christ and "converting everyone".
zzz.
I tried to explain that we're just telling people, didn't force, just letting them have another option to choose but he didn't listen.
SO, I DIDN'T LISTEN TO HIM AS WELL. HAH.
And up to now, my parents still don't understand why we students who don't earn our money give tithes.
They want me to give like $0.50-$1. -.-
I hate it when they ask how much I give. Gross out.

Dinner was good, was hungry so ate and did not talk/think much.
I guess this is why people choose to binge when they're sad.
They don't think of anything.
hahha.
Oh, we had satay after dinner too. It was good.

Car ride back home.
Listened and sang to songs, realised my voice was kinda spoilt.
Got scared, ate a strepsil.
Thought quite a bit.

Watched 画皮 back at home.
I guess my ability to withstand scary images increased.
Didn't have nightmares or whatsoever even when I saw the demon's face.
Which was very much computerised.
The part where the demon pulled off the human skin was pretty disturbing though.

Today's typical stay at home to study sunday.
Going for tuition soon.

Btw, I finished napfa 2.4 in 16.05 on friday.
Yay me.
Talk about coincidence,met Gina Goh on the train along with Shona and Izzahon friday afternoon.
Gina looks the same. still.
hahha.

I finally knew when I saw those eyes.

2009-07-16T17:59:00.021+08:00

Just saw wilber pan on tv.
I still think he's hot.
hahha.

Chinese O level oral was on tuesday.
the conversation wasn't hard, but I got stuck while reading the passage twice.
zzz.

I went running yesterday evening.
Hopefully I can do better in the napfa run tmr.

And Mr M shifted my place to the other corner of the class. -.-
Thank God I'm still with kar yee.

I've been really hooked on My zoo at facebook these days.
I check its situation whenever I have time.
Heh.

And, I've received quite a few presents for my birthday.
Really happy. (:

Xin Yuan's care bear. ( I feel like a cuddle-soft-toy-girl nowadays. You'll see why)

This is Kar Yee's really pretty jewellery box. It looks so old European times! Really love it. Took a lot of angles to show you guys how pretty it is and not "useless" quoting from my dad, since I can store all my pretty jewellery.(I've got photos for those too.)

Jonas daddy's soft toy. I love the texture of its furrr.
see what I mean by I'm becoming so soft-toy-cuddley now.

not to mention reeceiving handsome Leo last christmas.

My sister gave me a present too.
Its a really pretty necklace.

You can even shift the heart up and down. like a tie. super cool. :D
and the heart is studded. I can even go back to add on the studs if they fall off.
Yay, Helen!

oh, the cell group gave me a card too! though the photo they chose of my head was uglyyy.
ahhh.
my unglamness.
but still, thanks wan lin for designing it. :D

oh, charmaine bay(huggy partner) and serena gave me this:

THANK YOU! (:

and, celeste gave me this heart shaped cup and a Christian book

oh, on the 8th july, my sister and I went to pastamania for a big meal.

We were super full that dayy.

Oh, my mum bought really cute and pretty stuff for my sis and I.
Here's what I got.

This is so cute, with a white flower, golden wired star and a small pink pram!

Complicated, but I've figured it out.

Abstractly beautiful.

Real cute couple key chain.

Talking about this, the fortune teller made my mum write out my name and upon counting the strokes, he said I was hardworking, studies okay, but I have 桃花运。
Geez.

Wow, finally uploaded my pictures.
Havent done a picture post in a million years.

last picture to end off,
Jee Yen's folded heart with the ten dollar note she returned to me.

thanks for all the birthday wishes!

2009-07-10T16:50:00.002+08:00

Man, really love my friends.
So many people wished me yesterday.
At school,on facebook wall, by smses, by msn.
So sweet. :D

I really like my presents too, Kar Yee's, my sister's and Celeste.
And about half the class sang me a Crescent style birthday song too. :D

Oh, Kar Yee and I went to Tiong to eat sundae at Macs after school.
We wanted cake at first, but no space to sit.
She had the chocolate one, I had the strawberry.

I guess it was quite a good day.
And, I'm officially a year older.
oh man.

E math test today wasn't too bad.
I'm quite hopeful for both tests.
Hope the results turn out fine.

oh, we had chem practical today.
And I guess some acid got onto my arms and I was itching.
So I washed my arms with soap.
I felt like I was bathing in the chem lab or something.
Still itchy.
So I went to Ms Azilah and she used a special soap to help me wash.
and she said she felt like she was bathing a baby. hahha
the special soap did help.
And after I went back to my seat, I folded my sleeves and all.
Then just cause I fiddled with my sleeves a bit, Ms Azilah was like: " Are you okay? is it still itchy?"
And like almost the whole class turned around and looked at me.
Gosh. so malu~~~

BTW, did I mention that I failed my 2.4 (sort of trial) last wednesday?
Geez.
I had breathing difficulties, walked like a huge part of the journey.
I think I need to go swimming more often.
My lungs seem to be having some problems.

Oh, and I saw Uncle Ian today again. (:
He's like my friend though we're like a whole generation apart.Haha.
He made me look up to people who enjoy their jobs.
Rather than just working for money.
He enjoys being a PE teacher at Cat. High and I think its not easy to find a job you really like.
I wonder if I would be able to find a job that I like next time. (though my parents are always thinking about the money)

Did I actually mention that they've (joked) about my wedding 2 times already?
Saying they want my wedding dinner to be held in some glam hotel, and they want a milo tin can of gold, and blah.
Gosh, why don't they sell me off to some lonesome prince over the hills.

And, this morning, I was imagining the scene of my funeral.
Like if I died now, what would happen.
And I was imagining my friends saying their testimonials about me and crying on stage
and my family crying even harder.
AND, I felt like crying.
Seeing them hurt so much cut a lot you know.
Plus, I think its too early to die.
I must impact more people so they wont have too short testimonials when I kick the bucket. hahah.

you're going to be stoppable next time;

Trapped in my home.

2009-07-06T13:04:00.003+08:00

GAH.
Its a school holiday, everyone's out having fun with friends.
Except me.
Darn.

I'm so cooped up in this home of mine.
Facing books, the computer screen/tv screen and my family members all day.
Such a boring routine.
There's no meaning to my life.

I'm not good in anything.
Though I study, I dont excel.
And I'm not particularly good in any sports or can do any dance.
Seriously.

When will my parents stop trapping me at home?!
Really, I wish they'll kick me out to hostel after JC and make me fend for myself.

I'm so jealous of Celeste, she can just leave her house anytime she wants to go out.
And I dont even go out with my friends often.
I didnt get to go out with friends during the hols and I cant go out today too.
Life's really like a vacuum sometimes.
URGH.

whats happening to my life.
if I were to die anytime soon, I promise across my heart I'll regret living my life like that.

Btw, I don't understand why I have such a common face and common name.
I guess these made my life so common too.
Pastor Daniel mistook me for a girl called si feng on saturday.
So MANY people have asked me if I were at this certain place when I wasnt.
And they'll say they saw someone that looks like me.
Gah.
And my name is like so very common.
I bet there are uncountable "amanda"s in the whole world.

I feel like changing my url again.
Stay tuned folks, to my boring life.

Please. What youth day?

2009-07-03T15:45:00.002+08:00

Today was SUPPOSED to be youth day celebrations.
But THANKS to stupid H1N1, it was cancelled.
And thus, we had normal lessons.
But THANK GOD, its an odd week friday, and lessons ended at 1.30.

The school gave us a shoe bag, made of poncho material. -.-
I got dark green. -.-
Chen Lao Shi was really nice, she gave us a pouch.
I took a pink and brown one, adding to my amazingly huge amount of pink/red stuff I already have.
Awesome.
Chen Lao Shi's so sweeeeet.

Was so hungry on the way home.
We had our recess at 9 okay.
I reached home at 3.
Then I decided to cook instant mee goreng.
It was very delicious, hahah, seriously!

OH.
Had height and weight today.
I've really concluded that I've stopped growing.
I'm still 160cm. -.-
But I lost 2 kg. HAPPY :D
(Ps. I didn't go on a diet like so many people in the class.its madness la.)

I'm surprised teachers didnt give homework for the long holiday.
Hopefully they won't send homework through the email.
Cause I plan to go out with Kar Yee to shop.
Like celebrate my birthday, since I have E math test on my birthday.
Which is like a vacuum, sucks.

I was really eager in chinese class today to answer lao shi's oral conversation questions.
Hahah, hoepfully people were not irritated.
I prayyyy that O level orals on 14th july would be like lao shi's,
quite nice to talk about.

BTW, can I say that I really hate H1N1 and I think AYG is quite a failure.

1. H1N1 caused many AYG participants to go home, decreasing the competition between athletes drastically.

2. H1N1 causes many people to be cooped up at home for 7 days for nothing.

3. H1N1 made many people afraid of people who sneeze/cough.

4. AYG opening ceremony was terrible. ON TV. Lousy cameramen.

5. AYG council caused confusion about the type of uniform athletes can wear.

6. AYG council caused confusion about the selection, causing some athletes to slack in some heats (which is the norm) but was actually the choosing stage to determine who goes into the semis.

7. H1N1 caused some athletes to miss their heats and not be able to take part and win medals for Singapore as they were suspected to get the flu, but the longgg checks showed negative results and had caused them to miss their events.

8. AYG council priced tickets too high, causing Singaporeans to have little interest to go watch the matches.

THEREFORE, I THINK THAT AYG HAS LOTS OF SPACE FOR IMPROVEMENT AND THAT H1N1 IS ALSO LIKE A VACUUM, SUCKS.

Btw, my dad took part in the yew mei green table tennis competition (male category) last night.
And he's in the finals!
He'll be playing another competitor tmr morning.
Go, daddy, go.
I hope he wins.
I want him to teach me mannnn.

Chinese O level oral.

2009-06-24T19:01:00.002+08:00

Gah,chinese O level orals coming so soon.
2/7-16/7.(!!!!!)
And I can't believe the teachers at school didnt mention anything about it.
Thank God I signed up for 4 days oral tuition, if not, I'm so dead.

I enjoyed today's class.
There was a sec 4 senior, gosh, he's a huge joker.
Hahah, laughed quite a bit.
I guess thats the difference being in a girls' school.
Lessons lack jokes to make it humourous.
Oh, there was a japanese senoir too. Cool right~

Had choir from 9-5 yesterday.
At the end of the session, Mr. Tan told us alumni performance for us is cancelled.
So I felt like I wasted my time, I should have gone for tuition. zzz
And just cause Rui Ting and I were 1 minute late to come back from lunch, Juniper made us run 3 rounds around the parade square.
How nice.

I shall be more determined to do my abs exercise to improve my chorale singing.
And now,even my mum thinks I'm fat.
She saw me eatig supper and told me not to eat so much cause I'm fat.
ARGH.
How? :/
I'm so saddddd.

Well, I'm almost done with work, left with half a chinese compo and chem.
I've been major slacking these days, I think its bad.
I must make myself study more.
AMANDA, STUDY. AMANDA,STUDY. AMANDA,STUDY.

(PS. I love making others happy, really. But I realize, I'm always helping others, and no one really helps me. Oh well, I'll help myself then.)

And you're at that place that I know so well.

2009-06-19T15:18:00.003+08:00

Dang.
Yesterday when I was playing badminton, didn't hold the racket properly.
It was like jabbing into my wrist.
Now, there's a patch of bruise that the vein area.
Have been rubbing it to clear the clot since last night.

Took pretty long to sleep last night.
There was a period of time before I slept that a lot of scary images entered my mind.
Like scary clowns, jokers, dolls, I was trying so hard to block out that Chucky's face.
So scaryyyyy. I hate all those things.

When I slept, had a weird dream too.
Some woman kept following my family.
My family was weird too, kept going from place to place.
It was just really weird.

(I want to try jolly shandy. ASAP)

I hope my parents let me go for cell group outing on Monday.
Who cares if I get thrown into the sea?
hahaha.
Kinda fun right.

oh, that day, my sister and I were asking my mum about pregnancy kits.
Cause we passed by guardian.
Then I thought of cravings, so I asked my mum what Craving she used to have.
She said instant noodle soup. -.-
And I was thinking, dang, if I get durian craving then how.
I'll be so grossed out with myself. YUCK.

I've got Hoedown Throwdown stuck in my head.
Gah.
I bookmarked the video that teaches you how to dance the dance.
Going to use for mass dance.
Can't wait mannn.

I think I want a new blog skin.
Which matches my new msn account. :D
Shall change before the holidays end.

oh, I guess its too late, but Bon Voyage; have a safe trip.

"There's no telling why people hold onto the past, even when it jeopardizes their future.
Maybe it's because the past always looks better in the present.
Or maybe it's because the future is as mysterious as tomorrow's newspaper."

BLOG-REVIVING POST.

2009-06-18T18:09:00.003+08:00

GLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
I'M FINALLY BACK.

This is like my blog-reviving post.
Have abandoned it for a million years now.

Well, there has been ups and downs.
Not all happy, but well, I try to laugh, scream, smile, dance, sing still.
They are proof that I'm alive. :D

Today, I supposedly had a house meeting.
It was such a failure.
First time, holding in a meeting in my authority and NO ONE TURNED UP.
EXCEPT for Theng hui(awesome vice), Ruth(Hilarious ttm) and Genevieve(only sec 2 who came).
Oh, Sitifah joined us later.

So, all we did was choose songs for mass dance and discuss a bit on cheers.
WE NEED DANCERS FOR MASS DANCE.
AND I CAN'T DANCE FOR NUTS.
(I wish I didn't have to quit ballet in Primary 2. WHY WASN'T THERE ANYONE TO PICK ME AFTER PRACTICES. :[ )

Then, the 5 of us went for lunch at Tiong's BK.
Ruth was super funnyyy.

After lunch, I and Siti left while the remaining 3 musketeers went to catch a movie.
Siti had some NCC stuff.
I met up with Jun Kai, Nicholas Theng and Vanessa to playyyyyyy;
BADMINTON!~~~~~~

Had a really good time.
Perspired quite a bit, but I was happy about it.
Endorphins were released. YAY.
I lost my touch, ESPECIALLY MY BACKHAND.
But still, I really enjoyed today's session.

I played doubles and learnt a bit of the rules.
I was with Jun Kai; Vanessa with Nick.
(Cannot girls vs guys cause the guys too good. -.-)
BTW; Jun Kai and Nick T. looked so professional!
Especially Nick T., with his badminton shirt and bag. hahahah
And the guys really can play,(Sometimes, you can judge a book by its cover)
Jun Kai is over confident sometimes though.
ANDDD, Nick T. actually said to Vanessa " You must be fast cause Jun Kai so slow."
AHAHAH, Nick T. ; you want to die ar.

I had a lot of fun, we should so do this again one day.
ahahah.
And through today, I realise I like sports that make me perspire.
Like sprinting, badminton and all.
I don't really like swimming laps.
Just for fun like water play is fine for a hot day, you know.

I finally exercised.
Haven't been doing so.
Today exercised till my face was as red as my FBTs.
hahah.

sighs, its GSS.
And I HAVEN'T GONE SHOPPING.
I'M LIKE SO :///////
I NEED LIKE A NEW OUTING BAG,NEW SPECS, DRESSES AND I WANT SHADES.
AHHHHHH.

AND, the holidays are ending.
SHARKS.
I still see some undone homework.
Especially chem! (point a gun to my head)

BTW, I got a new phone~~~~
Sony ericsson W980.
Memory's huge, but only 77 songs.
I want more. more more more.
I want new songs.
I kinda like it, its glam.
The buttons are too out spaced though.
Oh wells, but at least camera is now 3.2 megapixels and not 2.
:D

I think I need a haircut.
I kinda hate my fringe now.
Gosh.

I need to go update my passport too.
Cause of my outdated passport, my parents couldnt book those $2 air tickets to KL.
awww,so sadddd. (yeah right. Being half malaysian, I'm sick and tired of that place.)
Call me evil, whatever, haven't been back for weeks.
Wonder how my grandparents are doing.
Hopefully my gong gong is feeling better.

I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO ADD THAT I OFFICIALLY HATE THE HILTON-RONALDO PAIR TTM EVEN MORE NOW.

CHEAPOS.

PLAYERS.

WE'LL SEE HOW LONG YOU GUYS LAST TOGETHER.

THEY DON'T DESERVE TO TALK ABOUT LOVE.

WHAT TEXT EACH OTHER EVERYDAY.

PLAIN RUBBISH I TELL YOU.

AND, MEGAN FOX IS NOT HOT.
LOOK HOW SMALL HER EYES AREEEEEE.
DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY EVERYONE IS GOING GAGA OVER HER. (ADINA,NICK CHUAN,XIN YI)
ISN'T

LEISTER MEESTER

AND

EMMA ROBERTS

SO MUCH PRETTIER?
THEIR EYES WIN. REALLY.

oh, and I bought izhou mag today.
Featuring the F4!~~~
Kim Beom~~~~
I was so :// when they said he's only 19 but already has 6 ex-es.
SIGHS.
Who ask him so cute.
Shortest relationship: 1 MONTH! GOSH
LONGEST: 1 YEAR AND A HALF. ONLY.
ANDDDD HE LIKES GIRLS THAT ARE A LITTLE OLDER.
(I was like, gosh, someone just kill me now?????)

For all those love sick heart broken souls out there, this is for you.

"So here’s a piece of advice: let go when you’re hurting too much, give up when love isn’t enough, and move on when things are not like before. For surely there is someone out there who will love you even more." (for me, that's God.)

Credits to sunsetcountdown-quotes.xanga.com ;
I love Celeste for introducing this awesome site! :D

I must confess;

2009-04-14T12:26:00.002+08:00

THAT MY RESULTS ARE APPALINGLY DEPRESSING.

I failed my elect geog graded assignment like crazy.
I didn't identify the LORMS question,
I drew wrong diagrams and gave wrong commentaries.

Everything that spells A-C-A-D-E-M-I-C-S is S-C-R-E-W-E-D.

I'm taking my A math test later.
hah.
I guess its going to turn out the same.

Maybe my future's just destined to be a goner.

As much as I'm really close to tears, I'm trying to hold it in.
And tell myself I need to put in more effort.
I need like 48 hours to get everything done well.

Once, I wanted to sleep forever. Now, its still a dream not fulfilled; & my life requires me to be a superhuman.

Let's hear it from America's Suitehearts, I Must confess, I hate my own ~~sins~~ results.

Why, I see that brainless girl staring back at me through the mirror.

2009-04-13T16:06:00.004+08:00

stupid girl, stupid girl.
I don't understand why I'm so stupid.
I guess cause I can't understand that fact, so I'm even more dumb than expected.
I can't seem to remember how to apply the A math and E math facts I learn, though they seem easy when I go through them and all.
But tests and exams just kill me.
KILL KILL KILL

I screwed my E math test today.
I can't get inequalities' signs right.
I don't know which is angle of elevation and depression.

& I haven't done my A math test. heh.
I tried some alpha beta questions earlier and I forgot my dad's teachings already.
How?!?!?!
I'm like going to fail it AGAIN..

SIGHS.
BTW, I THINK CAMPUS SUPERSTAR IS LAME.
They always let those 13 year old guys win, but after they break voice, their voices change and they can't sing as nicely anymore.
So whats the whole point right.
Just let the girls win la.
(I'm not being sexist okay.)

Oh, I watched "Knowing" on Good Friday with Celeste, Jonas G. , Elwin and Lois.
My primary school buds.
We went to Bugis.
It freaked us all out.
I couldn't sleep that night, so I missed choir the next day.
I'm such a SS. (Stupid scaredy-cat)

And my progress with Masterlife and Bible reading plan is like so lag.
I'm so behind time.
I hate myself at times like this.
I get NOTHING right.
Is there even anything at all that I can handle well?

My life needs fixing.

And, I was happy with the 4-0 Liverpool win against Blackburn.
Torres is the most awesome soccer player, I've ever seen.
His first goal was astounding, appalling awesome.
His second goal wasn't too bad either.
Thanks to Agger and Ngog for the other 2 goals to finish the game brillantly.

Though, Chelsea beat liverpool like 3-1.
That sad time passed fast.
AND STUPID MAN U HAS SOME SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD NEW GUY WHO SCORED TWICE FOR MAN U.
Without that Merceda whatever guy, Man U would have screwed up more than once.

oh, I found this link to watch live streaming of soccer matches.
so awesome right.
Its free.

okay, I'm done with my soccer talk.

oh, I actually gained weight.
I'm FAT.
(but empty in the brain. this sucks.)
I gained like freaking 3 kg?!?!
without growing tall.
I'm scared if I go running, I'll develop muscles.
Which are heavy and will make my calves so big.
But if I don't, I can't lose weight.
Tell me.
what to do.
OH LORD, SAVE ME.

I need God to give me more knowledge.
I'm really getting worried.
What if I don't get good O level results?
I'll be so screwed.
My hotel management dreams, dashed.
If I can, I want to try being a wedding coordinator, but I still need my business management studies.

Why are there people like Juniper, so smart and awesome in almost all aspects;
and someone so contrasting like me?

As the people say, success= 99% hardwork and 1% talent. I can't seem to say I'm hardworking enough, neither do I have the smarts.

People need a love demostration.

2009-04-09T13:13:00.003+08:00

People need a love demo,
And coincidentally, Its Good Friday tmr.
Just for your info, the holiday commemorates the Crucifixion of Jesus.
Its the greatest act of love.

Why this big bang with my starting of the post?
Here goes my long grandmother story.

I was feeling fine this morning, just afraid that I would be feeling unwell again.
I just started my period last night, and usually, the first day's the WORST.
When I was on the train to JE, my legs and arms were kinda weak.
I held out till JE, hoping to get a seat when I changed train.
Thank God, people alighted at clementi and I got a seat.
Which made me feel slightly better.

When I reached Redhill, I thought of taking the bus instead of walking.
However I saw the bus at the bus stop already, and reckoned that I wouldnt be able to chase it.
So I decided to stroll slowly to school.
I barely made it to the traffic light I have to cross in order to get to school.
I couldn't help it, and I squatted there at the traffic light.
THE BEST THING WAS: PEOPLE JUST WALKED AHEAD WHEN THE LIGHT TURNED GREEN.
CRESCENTIANS AND TEACHERS ALIKE.

Number 1: Who in the right mind squats at the traffic light? Couldn't someone show some concern?
2) Even if they couldn't recognise I was a Crescentian as I was in my house shirt, what's wrong with asking a stranger in pain " Are you okay?"
3) HOW COULD MR MUTHI JUST WALK AWAY LIKE THAT?! He's an adult, shouldn't he know better?

Seriously, you didnt know how shocked I was.
I only got the help I needed when I decided to stand up and saw my choir senior.
She helped me over to some benches outside the nearby condo to rest for a while before proceeding forward.
Thank God that when we were reaching the bus stop, I met 陈老师.
She was very helpful and nice.

I went over to the drain railings, cause I tasted the sour liquid that would be secreted when you're about to vomit.
But nothing came out.
Lao Shi said my hands were cold and I looked very pale.
I was sitting on the floor at the bus stop.

A teacher's attention was attracted and she gave me some medicated oil to apply.
Although it didn't really help.

Then, the OM came also.
I told them that I needed the toilet.
Cause I needed to relieve my undigested food to make my abdomen feel better.
But the OM said "Instead of going to the toilet, you should be going to the hospital." ( I didn't have the strength to say why I needed the toilet)
Lao Shi said that I was just cramping, so not that serious yet.

Oh, my chem teacher, Ms Azilah stopped while on her way to school to join in the "Act of saving Amanda 09/04/2009". (hahah, I'm still in the mood for jokes.)
The teachers (all female, could understand my plight better) so they wanted to support me to walk slowly up the slope.
I could only manage a few steps.

Thank God Kuan Lao Shi came driving in and she sent me up the slope to the foyer.
With Claris' support, I kinda brisk walked into the toilet at the GO.
I did my stuff, flushed the toilet.
Vomited, flushed the toilet.
And cleared what I didn't clear the first time.
Flushed the toilet, washed my mouth, went to sick bay.

Chen Lao Shi gave me a cup of warm water, the staff had prepared the hot water bottle for me.
Chen Lao Shi even helped me to cover the blanket.
She left and said she would come visit me later.

I laid on the bed for about half an hour, before my choir junior came in.
She looked exactly how I looked like before.
Pale, in pain, needed people to support.
Although they had another mattress, I thought I was better already, so I gave the hot water bottle and bed to her.
I also informed my parents not to come fetch me anymore.

I went for Elect geog class.
Could barely stay awake.
I went home in a cab.
(Was kinda worried inside, cause I was alone in the cab and you know, I was weak and all and shows always show the worst side of taxi drivers)
But,the uncle was nice enough.
I reached home safely and my grandma came home when I was at the doorstep.
I called the office and my parents to inform them I had reached home.

I had quite a good rest.
When I woke up, I realised my bro had twisted my specs.
I managed to twist it back, thankfully.

My mum says she'll bring me to see a gynae.
I hope she'll bring me soon.
I don't know whats' wrong with my body.
This has been occuring every month.
Period--pale,in pain, weak--vomit--feel better.
Its so weird, vomiting's like the best medicine you know.
Its going to be even weirder when I go to the gynae.
Can I wear a shirt there that says "I'm not a 15-year old mum. I just have some period problems." ?

But I still hope my mum really makes her word true and brings me to get a diagnosis.
My mum doesn't always do what she said she would.

I haven't eaten much, don't really know what to eat.

I hope that people will start showing more love and concern for others.
I'm not asking you to die for others like Jesus did.
Verbal concern is sometimes good enough.

Hotel management, my future(:

2009-03-30T21:16:00.002+08:00

Tonight, have been quite distracted with my computer.
Shall try harder to discipline myself.

Anyways, recently have decided to go into Hotel management next time(:
Means I have to take up business management,sounds good to me.
I love the idea of me smiling at tourists, being in a nicely furnished hotel all day.
Then I can put to use my English and Chinese (which I'm stronger in.)
So awesomely awesome right.

And, thank God my pimple and hair condition has improved.
Being in the tourism/service industry, first impressions count a great deal, don't you think?
So, I must take care of my face.

I'm so happy I finally have something to work towards.
Goal: Get to Anderson JC, get my As and go to NUS to complete hotel management and related courses.

Btw, I got into SYF.
YAY(:
20th April's the day to sing.

Oh, yesterday, I went down to Bukit Gomback stadium to watch a bit of the SPH relays.
It was kinda awesome.
SJI track was sickly fast.
They were leading by a lot in one of the 4 by 100m heats
In another of the heats, HCI dropped their baton.
What a waste, they could have been first.
I pity the first and second runner who gave a good headstart.
Overall, ACS(I) won the championships.
Amazing right.
SSS(Singapore Sports School) was thought to get the champion.

I like the atmosphere at events like that.
Though it was pretty warm and all.
I wore mainly red and white yesterday.
Jonas Goh said I was patriotic and blah at tuition.
Now I sit behind him.
I'm the only girl in my group!
Sexual discrimination.
(actually, its fate. who ask me to pick number 2?!)

Saturday's service was great too.
Loved the worship songs they chose and the sermon.
(:
Hope to bring more people to church, so they know how awesome it really is(:

okay gotta go.
BYE(:

See you in heaven.

2009-03-25T19:54:00.002+08:00

My title's my new catchphrase now.
I finally came to my senses yesterday, upon hearing that my grandpa's(dad's side) bro,who is my 叔公,passed away.
Up till now, I don't know what caused his sudden death.
I don't even have time to ask my dad.
My parents went down to Malaysia to pay respects yesterday.
And me, I was at home doing my work and feeling so very guilty.

Why?
1) He's currently suffering down there, and I had not done anything to save him from it.
2) I used to only visit him and his family every CNY. However, this time when I went back to malaysia, we didn't go to his place to visit.
3) That means, he doesn't even know I'm Christian, cause I wasn't one last CNY. I couldnt help him in any way, even after overcoming the age barriers and blah.

Even though, I ain't close to him, but it still pinches me somewhere deep down inside.
It doesn't feel good at all.
Him moving on was like so sudden, so out of the blue, so unexpected.

I really can't bear the thought of more of my friends and family going to that fire place which just burns so very hot.
I really want to be able to say "See you in heaven" to everyone.
Yes, EVERYONE.

Its not going to be easy, but I know God would continue to draw people to Him.
I pray that the Holy Spirit would speak through me, so the Good news may be spreaded.

Please understand that I'm not trying to convert you guys or anything like that(Cause I used to think this way of Christians),but I just want you guys to know that there is a God who loves you, and it does break His heart to see you not believing His existence.

After all, He did send me beloved Son to die for us, so that we may have freedom, salvation,that we may be forgiven for our sins.

Just look at the lives you're living, I'm sure you agree we are better off than many others.

Why?

Cause God provided.

He put you in your family, your country,your community,your society, your school.
He planned everything.
He provided your parents with a job, so that they may bring you up and let you lead a comfortable lifestyle.

Of course, I'm not saying that being a Christian would let you be trouble-free.
It just means that you'll have a pillar of strength, you'll feel so very loved, you'll know how to live a fulfilling life,you'll have someone to turn to when you're down and out.

Actually, I feel that many non-Christians actually believe in God, one way or other.
They're just oblivious to that fact.
For example, I frequently hear non-Christians saying "Oh My God" or "Thank God"
Isn't that already believing the existence of God, by thanking Him and exclaiming that He's your God?
If you believe in Him, then why don't you see all that He's done and is doing for you?

I understand, cause I've been through this myself.
I used to pray only when there's trouble.
Like during exams, I'll just pray, to whoever,sometimes even to God.
Or when I wish that my brother would just recover in a miracle and start yakking away.

On the other hand, I would be bad-mouthing Christians,
finding them annoying for all they do is try to convert people(old thinking)

Then one day, it struck me that actually, I believed in Him all along.
Just that I only turn to Him when in trouble.
And other times, I'll be bad mouthing his disciples.
That isn't fair at all isn't it?
Why should He be helping me?
I really thank God for Jonas' persistent efforts telling me about Christ and bringing me to Church,aiding me to find a love so true.

I hope that you friends in the future, would be thanking God for my efforts.

I just want to do my very best, to be a living testimony and to spread the Word.
Thus, I hereby want to make myself do the following:

1) Love everyone, even if they are irritating/backstabbers/hard to like people, I'll help them when they're down.

2) STOP GOSSIPING about others.

3)Don't lie.

4) Study HARDDDD and do well.

5) Sing well in choir

6) Be consistent in Masterlife and Bible reading plan so I can answer others' questions and be so close to God that I know what He wants me to say to others.

7) Don't misuse tablet in class(!!!!!)

8) Help others when they're in need/down. Help less fortunate when able.

To end off, its back to my catchphrase, see you in heaven. (PS. There's no "I hope to" Cause I want to give it my best shot to save as many as possible).

3 DOWN, 6 TO GO.

2009-03-02T14:31:00.002+08:00

Okay, I know my blog is like rarely updated now.
So sorry kays, you know common tests are here.
Today had 3 papers,languages and elect geog.
so means, I'm left with six papers.
We took the tests in the auditorium, tension was higher.
And it was coldddd.
My oversized jacket was exactly comfortable to be in.

I screwed chinese.
YAH, CHINESE.
Its supposedly one of my best subjects.
I'm dead man.

Geog was okay I suppose, not that scary.
And thank God I checked my Crezmail yesterday, to find out that we had no LORMS.
YAYYYY(:

Got my choir shirt today.
It seems biggg.
I should take smaller sizes next time.
But it was S already. ):

tmr's Lit, SS and chem.
Chem and SS scare me.
Lit's unseen.
awesome, no need to study.

Oh, Saturday's sermon was about fellowship with believers and loving one another.
Hence, I shall show more love.
I'll try my best.
Love you guys loads(:

Saturday evening had to go back to malaysia to celebrate my grandma's birthday.
AND JUST IN CASE PEOPLE STILL DON'T KNOW, I'M HALF-MALAYSIAN.
THANKS TO MY DAD.
I don't like travelling all the way back there.
So sickening.

Oh, and my sec cousin, who's studying in Bedok Green, has an admirer.
And my aunt was so happy about it.
Showing us my cousin's yearbook, asking us to guess and blah.
Not a very typical reaction of a mum. hahah.

Its been raining a lot these days.
I'm so not a fan of rain.
Gosh.

I can't wait till common tests end on thursday.

SYSTEM OVERLOAD, SCREAMING NO NO NO NO NO.

I'm feeling dead.

2009-02-22T14:14:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling so dead in this lazy overcast afternoon.
My brain isn't working.
And common tests are like on the first week of march.
sighs.

Superhuman is such an awesome duet song by Chris Brown and Keri Hilson.
I just love it so much.

"You changed my whole life
Don't know what your doing to me with your love
I'm feeling all super human, you did that to me
A super human heart beats in me"

Lost notebook.

2009-02-15T14:34:00.004+08:00

ARGH.
I'm going insane.
I can't find my pink church notebook.
I'm going bonkers.
If I can't find it, I'm so dead.
I hate it,whenever I feel sad, then something else hits me and I get super irritated and angry.
So much that I feel like cursing and swearing and shouting into my pillow till I lose my breath.

I'm supposed to be at church now.
Singing to Planetshakers songs and worshipping God wholeheartedly.
But I got rejected again.
Feelings of rejection just cut so much you know.
And I everytime I just cry, feeling so helpless.
But today, I told myself I have to honour my parents,so I gave up the Satanic thought of slipping out of home.

This morning, I woke up at 8.15 to do Masterlife till 9.15.
Its a miracle I woke up so early, since its Sunday.
I really tried to finish all my homework to go for Planetshakers.
But.

So I'm singing to their songs at home.
How pathetic right.

Yesterday,I cried quite a lot at church.
Especially when we sang "In Your freeedom, I will live".
I couldnt help myself but pour out.
Cause I thought, I'm living in freedom and how much can I do for my loved ones, for they are living in darkness.
Just like what Pastor Mike said, everytime we feel we're getting closer to God, a chain just pulls us back.
Be it circumstances or bad habits or situation.
And we just go back to square one.

But I'll try harder.
Cause I know Jesus will help me.

Yesterday night, I found out a really happy sort of secret.
hahah, I've got a admirer.
Sec 1 crescent junior la.
Don't let your thoughts go wild.
But I was very happy and high.

Friday night was great.
I went for Crezawards with Kar Yee,Nicole and Si Jia.
There were a lot of other beauties were around too.
We screamed a lot during the concert.
When Jollin started out, I stood up and shouted I love you Jollin.
When Pearlyn started, I cheered for her a lot.
When Ariel sand her under the sea, I cheered for her a lot too.
When Juniper sang, I was over the top. Super high, screamed lots.
Of course, Juniper won. (:
She's my idol. Totally.

Here's wishing everybody a belated Valentines.
Jesus love you, I love you too.
Let's love one other like He did.
Sorry, if I've shown any dislike to you, I really do still love all of my friends and people around me. (:

Lost notebook.

2009-02-15T14:34:00.001+08:00

Miss eating dou hua shui.

2009-02-11T19:57:00.002+08:00

I suddenly have this strong craving and missing for dou hua(soya bean beancurd).
I miss it a lot.

(and no, I'm not pregnant.)

I just miss it a lot now.
I want to eat beancurd!

(and no, I'm not hoping for my skin to be as smooth as the beancurd.)

I JUST WANT TO EAT BEANCURD, that sweet,smooth,soft delicacy(to me).

Self-destruction.

2009-02-11T19:15:00.002+08:00

I'm like totally self-destructing now.
I'm still coughing with phlegm but I don't end my medicine as instructed.
And I still continue eating CNY goodies, chocolates,candies and drinking sweet drinks.
But well, I have good enough reasons to self-destruct actually.

I'm just so disapointed in myself.
I suddenly feel that I'm like this masked person,behind this facade.
I'm actually a really mean,rude and arrogant person deep down under.
WHY?!
I hate myself for being that way.
I can't understand why my mouth just seems to shoot hurting stuff so fast.
I need a word filter for my mouth.
Cause I've been telling myself not to gossip about people behind their backs.
Yet I still do.
I feel like I'm not worth all this I have.
All of God's provisions.

I know I want so much, to be the nice person I seem to be all the time.
But somehow sometimes, Satan just unleashes the ugly side of me.
I don't want to be this hateful.
I don't want to end up losing friends,spoiling relationships and being a failure disciple of Him.
I need to work harder for a change and not just talk big.
I really don't want to be so fault-y.
I know I can't be perfect, but at least, I want to live a God-ly life.
I want to be like my role model.

Here's a apology cum prayer for Joey Lee:
Dear Joey, I'm sorry for being mean today. I really truly meant to wake you up, so you can see that sleeping in class and misusing the tablet is really not good for you.I really wish you'll change,so your studies would see a goodturn. I know you can do it. Like how you passed your recent A math test. I pray that the Lord would help you, to overcome your desires to sleep in class and use the Internet. I pray that God would help you fend away the evil temptations of Satan. Also, please forgive me for shooting of my mouth that day. I pray you'll be able to overcome your struggles soon. Let's change together yeah? I pray in Jesus' name, Amen.

Btw, elect geog test was okay.
Drew a few diagrams and all, hope it'll be okay.

Crezawards is on Friday.
I hope my parents let me go, haven't spoken to them about it. [Another bad point. I always hesistate when asking stuff like that, cause I'm afraid of disappointment. Go ahead, call me a scaredy-cat.]
All the best to Juniper,Jollin and Pearlyn.
Love you guys loads loads.

I hope the choir shirt is nice.
we're paying $9.80 for it, its reasonable to me.

Called up Serena to clear some doubts while reading the Bible.
Charmaine and Jonas didnt pick up my call.
*HMPH*
You guys are so going to get it from me.
ahahha.

Btw, I prayed for the cell just now, really hope we could all grow into Christ together and help each other.
Shucks, forgot to pray for Yun Hui, the new girl.
Going to do so now.

Prayer request: Help me pray that I will change ASAP, I will recover ASAP, I will do fine for my tests, I will be able to continue reading the Bible diligently,I will do Masterlife 5 days a week,my parents' hearts would soften and let me go to Crezawards and that they will see the importance of Cell group and service and that the people around me will be drawn to God(: [ Okay, you can choose from the list above,shan't make it too troublesome for you guys.]

(PS. Sorry nick, I know I've been losing touch with you, will try catch up okay. I've been busy and all. sighs. I won't forget you, no worries. hahha.)
And to all the other people I've been neglecting, accept my sincere apology.
Call/text me in case of serious missing/needing of advice blah blah blah(:

Stress packed.

2009-02-10T12:35:00.002+08:00

I know I've disappeared for a while.
Sorry, its been really busy for me.
With class tests and homework and choir and blah.

Just got back my Add math test today.
Luckily I passed with 13/20 :D
We need to buck up together as a class yeah.
The teachers are looking down on us you know!

and my cough hasn't fully recovered yet.
its so sickening.
the medicine doesn't seem to help.
Or maybe cause I don't really eat my medicine on time.
and I ate a cadbury chocolate bar yesterday.
and I ate sweets and snacks.
Whoops.
I'm so not caring about my health.
why.
I'm hopeless.

Bon Voyage;

2009-02-05T22:08:00.002+08:00

This post is dedicated to my cousin, Damian gor gor(This sounds so disgustingly weird,but I wouldn't want to risk him killing me again.)

Bon voyage,
I pray that you'll have a safe flight.
I pray that you'll have two/three fruitful study years at Australia.
I pray that you won't fall sick.
I pray that you'll make new friends soon.
I pray that you'll excel in your studies.

When you're away,
I'll miss serving you food and drinks when you come over.
I'll remember how you say "Thank you" or "Good girl" after I bring your food/drink to you.
I'll miss you watching soccer matches with you.
I'll remember how you scream in victory when Liverpool scores.
I'll miss you saying your lame jokes.
I'll remember how you smile after saying your jokes which just don't tickle my funny bone sometimes.
I'll miss you pressing me with your back against the lift wall.
I'll remember how you just love bullying me.
I'll miss the times you come over to play your PSP and play station.
I'll remember the time you slept over to spend time with us when my parents were away.
I'll miss having you over when you fix our cranky house computer.
I'll remember how determined you always are,to clear the viruses.
I'll miss the time you taught me math so wonderfully.
I'll remember how you always scold me for being rude and proud,I promise I'll change.
I'll miss the time when you ruffled my hair to comfort me when I was sad.
I'll remember the time you rested your head on my arm,saying how heartbroken you were.
I'll miss you comparing your humongous hand with mine.
I'll remember how your hand covers most of my face.
I'll miss you saying how much better you are than me.
I'll remember how good your English is.
I'll miss seeing you savour ah ma's curry in delight.
I'll remember you love the potatoes in the curry.
I'll miss the times when you actually sought my help for your problems.
I'll remember how I racked my brain for an answer and then screwing things up,but you didn't blame me.
I'll miss you.
I'll remember you.

Goodbye, and come back soon.
We are your family, there are many like us, but this family's yours.
Remember we'll all be waiting and missing you in Singapore.
And when we meet again, I promise you see a changed me.
A better me.
And not just this stupid,arrogant,rude girl missing your presence in Singapore.

I attach this post, with truckloads of love,bucketloads of tears and numerous well-wishes.

SS test: 11/12

2009-02-05T21:53:00.002+08:00

On Monday, I had running nose.
It wasn't a good experience.

On Tuesday,it got slightly better.
The Sec 1s came for their first choir practice.
During choir,talked quite a bit with Pearlyn.
And when practice was nearing the end, we seniors had to sing the scared songs for sec 1s and of course to select 2 other pieces for SYF.
I realised then that there were two juniors constantly looking at Pearlyn and me's direction;whispering some stuff.
Gosh, is it that amusing to see us sing?
Or is it that fast for them to gossip about us?

On Wedenesday, I developed cough.
I was coughing pretty badly, my chest hurt,especially at night.
I went to see a doctor, and I was so in need of time.
I was STUDYING A Math while waiting at the clinic.
Secondary 3 life is really kinda stressful.

Today, I only went to school for A math test and English test.
English test was a narrative essay.
I wrote on Carelessness.
Hope I do fine.
A math test was pretty okay I suppose.
But I'm doubtful of some of the answers I got.
Hope I don't fail it, don't want to fail any tests as far as possible.

I received my SS test paper back.
I was kinda at a loss of emotions.
10/12. Add 1 mark for conclusion.
Total: 11/12
I'm like, wow.
I did expect myself to do well in that test,cause I wrote a double page essay filled with memorised content.
But I didn't expect things to turn out so good.
This is really a case of "Through You,I can do anything." (:

Congrats.

2009-02-02T21:37:00.001+08:00

Oh, I forgot just now.
CONGRATS TO CRESCENT HOCKEY FOR BEATING STC IN THEIR FIRST MATCH. (:
They trained really hard, like everyday during the holidays.
They do deserve the win.
I hope you guys don't blame me for leaving.
I guess, its less strenuous for everyone too, cause I'll only pull you guys back from achieving the golds.
So, continue working hard, I'll go down to support when I can yeah?
(:

A need for change.

2009-02-02T20:38:00.002+08:00

Firstly, I see a need of change in me.
I'm too arrogant for my own good.
I think I'm better than a lot of others, when actually a lot are better than me.
I despise people, even my relatives if they aren't in very good schools and if I did better in major exams.
I shoot my mouth off like some gun and I hurt people cause I'm proud.
All these has to go.
I need to stop feeling that I'm better than Pei Yi, she's a year older than me.
Yet I always feel superior. (seriously, what the heck's wrong with me these years?)
I need to stop looking down on Marilyn, cause in any case,she's in SCGS.
How she got in, isn't a important thing.
I should be treating my cousins and fellow friends with more respect.
And be more humble.
And process my words through my brain before saying them.
I would like to give special thanks to Damian,elder cousin from mum's side whom I really think is awesome, for really making me wake up,how foolish I am.
I promise I'll make a effort to change.

Secondly, I'm over the moon that Torres made a comeback.
Saving Liverpool from entering an abyss of despair.
Liverpool beat Chelsea 2-nil, but I wouldn't say hands down.
I thank God for tiding them through the tough game.
The Blues now really has the Monday Blues.
HAH.

Thirdly, I'm down with running nose.
Which sucks.
I hate to fall sick.
I've used to many pieces of tissue,I lost count.
Pray for me, people reading this. :/

Fourthly, I see a need to improve my English as well.
I can't believe I actually said " Roger Federer has so many sticks" when he took out a new racket yesterday during the Australian Open.
This also goes back to me, needing to be more humble.

Fifthly,I feel sad for Roger Federer.
I mean he lost to Nadal,who just runs crazily fast.
Quoted from my cousin Damian: " Federer's eyes are like radars, he can choose the corners to hit the ball and making sure its still in the court. The problem Federer has with Nadal is that Nadal is like a horse. When Federer hits left, Nadal runs to the left to get the ball. When Federer hits right, Nadal can still get it. Thus, Federer is already out of ideas."
But well, I just Nadal kinda deserves it, since he ran so much and considering he played a 5 hour game on friday.
(Just so you know, I'm not so updated with Tennis. Just that we were watching it over dinner yesterday.)

Sixthly, I'm getting either old or stressed out.
Celeste pulled out a strand of white hair from my head yesterday.
I'm like, am I THAT old?
Then I realised, I probably am.
Since I have a cousin, 12 whole years younger than me.
Since he's born in the year of the Dog too.
(I went to his birthday dinner cum everyone's birthday dinner yesterday. You know the ren ri thing. yeah.)

Seventhly, I didn't get into Crezawards.
But I'm fine with it.
Thanks for all your support, anyway.
Sorry to have disappointed you guys.
Anw, I need to find people to attend it with me now.
Its going to be fun, Valentine's eve masquerade.
WOW.
I congratulate Jollin, Juniper,Pearlyn and Salwa who got through the auditions.
Make Crescent Chorale proud! :D

Eightly,
I finished the January Bible reading plan and I'm now on track with the Feb's one.
Hopefully I can continue my good progress.
Reading everyday's good for spiritual growing and can instill a sense of discipline in me.
Awesome(:

I feel so matured in this post.
Like the stuff I wrote,words I used.
I guess it was high time I became more aware of the faults I have.
I pray I'll be a better and God-lier person soon.

Fireproof.

2009-01-31T21:05:00.002+08:00

Today's been a long day.
Had biology extra class in school from 9-11.30.
Super brain-draining.

During today's service, we watched the movie Fireproof.
It was awesome.
Hilarious and Godly at the same time.
However, I sat right at the back.
Being way too short, I was blocked by Adina's head diagnoally left and by Jonas' head diagonally to the right.
(Both screens were at extreme ends.)
And my neck had a pretty hard time, was sitting in awkward positions most of the time.
But I still loved the movie, laughed a lot.

We had communion today too, I cried quite a lot.
I'm determined to change in more ways.
Kick bad habits, be a better example, bring glory to God.

The cell went to Lay Guan's house for visitation after service.
Nicholas went to meet them too!
So sad, I missed a chance of meeting him.
Haven't seen him in a while, but glad he managed to meet Sarah today.
I pray that his relationship with his parents would get better(:

oh, Jonas actually made up a part of my dream yesterday.
How interesting.
But its not real la.
I don't think he like My chemical romance. Does he?
hahha.

And my new maid is here!
She's called Marissa.
Hahah, she's so cute and short. ( I think I'm a head taller than her. ahahaah)
So for the time being, I have TWO maids.
I feel so blessed. (:

And, I heard Zhao Lun's appealing to ACJC.
Though I don't have positive thoughts about that school, but I pray you get accepted.
And Adina's going to PJC, I pray she has 2 good years there.
And I pray, I'll don NJC's uniform in 2 years time. :D

I pray for everyone out there, that he or she will come to notice God's love and peace. May God bless everyone tonight. I give the Lord all the honour,glory and praise.I pray in Jesus' name, Amen.

Crezawards audition. :/

2009-01-28T18:12:00.002+08:00

Sorry, I've been really busy with CNY and all.
Hope everyone's CNY has been awesome.
Mine was pretty good.
Collected quite a lot of ang pows.
Met up with lots of relatives, some of which I'm not even sure how I'm related to them.
Just know they're probably my grandpa's siblings' children or something.
ahahah.

And Nicholas told me that to burn off the calories of one pineapple tart, you have to run 1.6 km.
And it so happens that pineapple tarts are my biggest love during CNY.
But I didn't care, but maybe some of you guys out there should start caring.
AHAHHA, I'm not trying to be mean okay.
Just saying.

Oh, and my cousin(dad's side) who's 21, brought his girlfriend back home.
I shan't comment on her, cause I don't know malaysian guys' taste.
I'll just wait to go for his wedding in say 2-3 years time.
I love going for OTHER PEOPLE'S wedding dinners.

Anw, I went back to malaysia yesterday.
Mosquitoes left like 4 love bites on me.
which sucks, cause I've got one on my cheek.
Its so itchy.
And I didn't gamble yesterday. ((:
Great improvement for me.
The rest improved too, this year, gambling cut down a lot.

And my cousin Xue Fen(dad's side),
she takes english and is working as a course counselor.
Encourages people to take the course and all.
Her english is really funny.
But not bad for a malaysian.
She keeps using Haven't.

I was in the car for 3 hours yesterday,
huge jam at the customs.
See why I hate going back to malaysia.
So much for being a half-malaysian, Jonas.
I'd rather at least be a full-fledged SINGAPOREAN.

Today I had Crezawards auditions.
I don't know why I got so scared last min, my voice was wavering like mad.
I was trying hard to smile and cover up the shaking.
Gosh,I should have prayed before hand to calm myself.
Everyone kinda screwed, but we're just hoping for the best.
I know Juniper would get in, she's singing Fly me to the moon.
And she sings so awesomely.
And Juniper, not that I want to dream of you all the time, okay.
I bet you put some spell on me. ahahah.

Chinese New Year preparations.

2009-01-18T20:18:00.002+08:00

Feeling the CNY mood yet?
I kinda feel it, haha.

I went CNY clothes shopping at Causeway point last night, I was so happy.
I bought this white collared shirt, greenish blue short dress that comes with a belt(of course,I'm wearing tights together.) and white shirt with lots of stars printed on.
I love shopping for clothes, and trying them on.
The happiness is indescribable. (:
I CAN'T WAIT TO WEAR MY NEW CLOTHES, CAN'T WAIT, CAN'T WAIT.

Oh, btw, yesterday afternoon I went to church.
(I didn't go to Malaysia with my family.)
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, was the main theme.
If Yi Ning could get 8 points, I don't see why I can't, with God and hard work.

Today,went to Chinatown.
I bought a pair of shoes at OG(:
Its blue and has a flower at the centre. hahahah
I was helping Michelle and my sister find shoes.
It was tough work.
My sister didn't manage to get something at the end, sighs.

After the shoes shopping, we ate lunch at the hawker centre.
The Char Kway Teow wasn't nice, but the sugarcane drink made up for it((:
After lunch, we walked around Chinatown, squeeze here and there.
Michelle wanted to find the stall that sold some necklace.
Found the stall after walking for super long.
My aunt and ah ma went to eat durians.
Gosh, durians STINK.

And, there was a period of time when my aunt went to top up Marilyn's Ezlink card and we sat at the steps outside the station to wait for her.
I sat beside the metal railings,then my grandma ask me to move in.
Then when I moved in, I hit my head against the metal railings.-.-
This goes to show that I'm short.-.-

Anw, after the chinatown trip, went for tuition.
(I slept in the car, I was really tired.)
Tuition was fun, Liu lao shi can't pronounce whale,sale and sell.
AHAHHA. She's another real cute teacher.
(The other's Mdm Yeoh, hahahha)
Don't say I'm weird for commenting that my teachers are cute okay, they really are.

anw, I gotta go bathe, I'm starting to stink(Not as bad as durians of course.)
hahhaha.

Signing off with love.

Back; with a bang.

2009-01-16T17:55:00.002+08:00

I've decided to make a comeback, my blog's been dead for pretty long.
How's 2009 been?
Mine's been kinda busy and all, but you know, life's awesome with Jesus(:

Thanks to Him, I've made loads new great friends(My new BFF's Karyee! :D);
I've been coping quite all right with lessons;
and I'm doing fine in Choir(:

Gah, hope next monday comes faster; and slower.
Slower cause I so DON'T want my E math test paper back.
Faster cause I can get my Crezawards form. YAY(:
Just in case you guys don't know, Crezawards is an annual singing/dancing/compre/band contest.
Well, I guess you guys probably would guess I'm going for vocals.
I'm doing this for experience(:

oh, my school's O level average score is like 10.1.
And I heard that to minus 2 points using higher chinese, you have to get B3 and above.
A person like me really needs to get 4 points minus-ed off.
NJC is my dream school, its fantastic and near.
I might be aiming too high, but well, even if I drop,I won't drop that badly.

I'm already preparing myself you know.
I bring my tablet to school lesser, so I won't get tempted to use Internet during class.
Plus, Kar yee and I are very disciplined, we don't chit-chat all the time.
I'm really happy to have her as my new friend, that dancer with a funny laughter.
ahahah.

Btw, at choir yesterday,Mrs Lim made the alto 2s really angry.
I mean, all sections are impt in every song.
How could she say that alto 2s were not as impt as our parts were little in the SYF song?!
And she switched me to Alto 2 to help them with the SYF song cause there was no enough people.
We were kinda pissed and all, we didn't practise at sectionals.
Just complained and then highed over a lot of pop songs.
Pearlyn and Anna even tried to sing ABC backwards. hahah
(PS, I did take some time to learn their alto 2 part okay.)

AND AND, 2 days ago, a senior and I met A FLASHER.
I'M NOT JOKING.
She and I bought breakfast from Mr Bean.
Then we walked from Redhill mrt to school together.
And I was happily saying some stuff to her, not noticing my surroundings.

After we crossed the condo construction area, she was like " Amanda, we just passed by a flasher."
Me: "Really meh? I didn't see. Luckily he didn't do anything."
She: " He did! He left his whatever out of his pants. ( Describes disgustingly)
And I went yuckeww;seriously,what is his freaking problem?
She was so traumatized. I was disgusted;feeling lucky I was busy talking.

When I went to class, I told Nicole and she told me she met a flasher once too.
Just that she laughed at the flasher and he ran away -.-

When I told my mum, there was a point in time, she told me to point middle finger at the flasher.
Then I'm like: " MUMMY?! how can you teach me to do stuff like that?"
And she laughed.
I don't know whether to say she's cute or crude.

But, I'm happy to say 1 flasher has been caught.
There's still TWO hanging around redhill somewhere.
Creeps who just enjoy scaring Crescentians.
Sick in the mind seriously.

And, there's a black long snake slithering in our school compound.
I hope they catch it before it bites me.
I'm not a fan of snakes and their venom.

I pray that I'll get into Crezawards,the flashers get caught soon, the snake is exterminated,that I won't fail my E math test,things get better for Nick,my friendships with all my current friends will last and that I'll know how to deal with whats on hand now. I give the Lord all the honour,glory and praise. I pray in Jesus name, Amen.

Byebye.

2008-12-02T18:59:00.001+08:00

Sad to say, I'm abandoning my blog.
Too lazy to post.
waste time luh.

But,feel free to tag, I'll reply them whenever I remember to check out my blog.
Or when someone tells me there are new tags.
hahha.

Lazy much.

2008-11-27T18:04:00.002+08:00

Sorry, I've been so lazy to post these days.
Let me bring you backwards.

Tuesday;
I went to the new Lot 1 library with my sister.
It looks fantastic.
So does the new Lot 1 basement, so much nice food there.
There's subway now(who's favourite, huh? hahah)
I ate KFC after borrowing the books cause I was hungry.
heh.

I went home and starting reading one of the books.
Doing my phrasebook at the same time.
Its part of the English holiday homework.

Yesterday;
I stayed at home with my sister.
I did my phrasebook thingy and used the com.
Went to swim a while with my sis.
I haven't swam in a million years.
I only swam 2 laps, and just slacked the rest of the time away.

My grandma cooked meatball soup with these really cute panda fishcakes.
I took a photo, but apparently, my tablet's bluetooth is cranky again.
Thus, I shall show you the picture next time.

Today;
had practice in school from 10am to around 1pm
We were singing the SYF song, White Horses.
I found out SYF is like around April too.
Talk about coincidence.

After practice, had lunch with Mei Jun,Zhuo Min,Anna,Evangeline and Zi yu.
At BK.
We laughed a lot.
And Anna mixed up dumbo for jumbo.
And Mei Jun kept saying she felt like a walrus, mammoth.
And then we were like whats the difference between seal and sea lion?
No one knew.

After I came home, went swimming with my sis and cousin.
Michelle's staying over again(:
She's super cute, and she sings the Barbie Girl song.
hhahah.
I think I burned more calories today than yesterday.
But I scratched myself today,against the rocks.
Cause my condo has rock pools.
then my wound bled a little, but I could withstand the pain.
Wasn't too bad.
We had fun in the jacuzzi, seeing our swimsuits inflating and then bursting the bubble.
hahhah, Michelle kept pretending she was pregnant and all.

ANNNDD, I don't know why little j said I lied to Joey or her mum, cause I didn't.
Anddd, I didn't cause trouble for them, rather, they are causing trouble for me.

Btw, taylor swift's Love story and fearless are such awesome songs(:

And I can't wait to see Celeste and Lois tomorrow,
miss them loads. (:

Share Jesus Without Fear

2008-11-24T18:36:00.002+08:00

Came home not too long ago;
attended the Share Jesus Without Fear workshop at Church.
There's going to be another session,which I know would be really helpful.
Cause I really want to know of ways to spread the Word,
so people can get saved(:

Attended the workshop with Baybay,Nick,Jonas,Lay guan, Rachel Kan and Yi Mei.
We played some game before the workshop.
And I got to know some Crescent senoirs, they seemed nice. (:
There was another Nicholas around, who seemed a little over enthu during the game.
Hahha.

And during the workshop sometime, Pastor was like talking about soccer.
He said to the girls not to shut off their ears.
And I raised my hands saying I'm special.
Hahhaa, there weren't many people around anw, was a relatively small group.

I almost couldn't go for the workshop, thank God I could in the end.
I was pretty sad yesterday, cause my parents said no.
And you weren't around to talk to me.
And the When you're gone song just had to pop in my head and my mouth just had to sing it.
And, yeah,you know the rest.

The others are at BBQ now. :/
I didn't dare ask for too much,so yeah, I skipped it.

Oh,my mum called me after the workshop to tell me a teacher from school called her;
saying that there could be a chance for me to take pure geog,
BUT I have to take elect hist. :/
I thought God decided that Lit's better for me,
but now He's offering me this chance out of the blue,
I don't know what's His plan for me.
So, I'll pray and hopefully I'll get an answer.

And you know, Torres joined Liverpool on the 4th of July 2007.
Which was only 5 days before my birthday.
Cool huh.
Annnnddd, I think Pastor Daniel's a Liverpool fan too.
HAH.
(Fernando Torres, Liverpool's number nine!) *sorry, I just had to sing it.*

OHH, and I'm going to find people to go for My Hope!
Its a party at Wan Lin's house at Clementi.
And the best part is you'll get to know more about Jesus(:
Interested parties,inform me! (:

Let's save those fragile souls one by one, together as a team in faith.

MUSICAL EVENING 2008 AND CRESCENT CHOIRSTERS ARE SO LOVED.

2008-11-22T23:08:00.004+08:00

I guess this is how debut concerts are like.
The night before, you can't sleep as much as you want to.
You keep imagining how tomorrow would be like.
The songs keep playing in your head.
Your grandma's snoring away, your sis is still watching tv and you can't do without her.
You toss and turn, you squeeze your eyes, you frown, but its not till you change room and its way past midnight then you get to sleep.
Well, at least that's what happened to me.

Yesterday morning, I woke up, packed my stuff, still rather calm.
Made my way to school by train, carrying my huge New balance bag and gown.
The bag's new btw, my parents bought it from US that time.
Hahha.
I was slightly late, was walking as fast as I could from redhill.
Till there's blisters now.
At sch, we warmed up,practiced a bit.
Ms Ong told us about her friend's story.
and I deduced that girls shouldn't fall head over heels with guys.
And vice versa.

We took a bus to Yushof Ishak Hall, and ate at Central Square.
I ate Wanton Noodles, it was cheap and good.
The way Juniper ordered her noodles was funny la.
We ate, then walked over to Yong Siew Toh Conservatory.
Practiced, got ready, did make up, did our hair and all.
It was so fun, we took photos too.
Had so much fun memories.

Dinner was awesome too, Nasi lemak was nice.
Everything's so awesome, its beyond words.
I can't really describe, but everything was just awesome.
Awesome awesome awesome.

And I realised that I still love performing on the stage a lot.
Like in primary school, I loved each and every time I could perform.
And I'm glad choir's helping me so much,
to fulfill my aim,to bring so many good friends into my life and all.
Choir's the loveeeee.

I thank God for removing the nervousness and all.
And for providing the food, the makeup, everything.
ANNDD all my new friends at Choir, I love them so very much.

And, I think I should get contacts luh,
I realise how ugly my specs look with the makeup.
And how pretty all my friends looked specs-less.
But I wanted to find for my family and friends in the second half, so I wore. :/

Though I screwed a little, but I had lots and lots of fun.
And so much wonderful memories.
I LOVE CHOIR, I LOVE EVERYTHING(:

Some pictures:

Top row: Pearlyn,Zhuo Min,Mei Jun.
Second row:Anna, me, Zi Yu.

From the top, me, Anna, Evangeline,with Zhuo Min on her left and Zi Yu on her right;Pearlyn,Mei Jun, Ariel, Juniper.(:

Juniper's pointing at my head, Pearlyn,Anna and me are trying to stack up, Ariel's kissing air. HAHHA.

See how Juniper's head sticks out. HAHAH.

Jia Yi looks pissed,Jorina looks blur. hahhaa.

Zhuo Min was closing her eyes! And Juniper stood out once again. HHAHA.

And, the love for choir and singing is indescribable.

Back from the awesome Japan.

2008-11-20T10:50:00.007+08:00

Miss me much?
No more waiting, cause I'm backkkkk :D
Konichiwa(:
Japan was superb, I LOVE AUTUMN.
ITS SO PRETTYYYYY.

Here's some autumn pics from the places I visited in Japan:

It was a free and easy holiday, got our way around by trains and walking.
Their train lines are like wow.
You can take diff trains to diff places on the same platform;
its easy to get lost if you're not careful.
But its very well connected.
And they have rapid trains to get you to specific places fast by skipping some stops.
AND; Japanese are so so so courteous.
They line up so nicely to wait for trains and they wait for alighting passengers to alight before boarding.
And they don't make noise in the train, don't talk on phones.
Such nice people.

okay, so let me give you an idea of my fabulous Japan holiday.
My cousins and aunt tagged along.
My uncle couldn't take leave as he needed to mark and invigilate exams for NTU. ):
okay, so Marilyn, the sec 1 cousin, Michelle's the P4 cousin.

DAY ICHI (it means one in Japanese):
I woke up at 2.40 a.m.
Washed up and bathed.
And I was superrrrr hungry.
So I made Milo.
We got our stuff and took a maxi cab to the airport.
Too bad my family's big.
Not only were there 6 people, everyone's fat.
Except me. HAHAHAHA.

okay, so we met Marilyn's family there.
I shared porridge with my sister,mum, dad.
Haha, then we bade goodbye to my uncle and checked in, blah blah blah.
I was in black turtleneck and carrying the Bossini bag my mum bought and my hair was untied.
I looked so OLD.
:/ :S :/ :S

The plane ride was horrendous.
I was okay at the start, watched The Dark Knight.
Then I starting having cramps.
Then I decided to eat a Panadol pill.
Right after I ate, I tasted some sour stuff in my mouth.
I knew something was not right.
I took the paper bag and you guessed it.
I puked.
I continued feeling so uncomfortable.
Walked up and down the aisle, kept going to the toilet.
Squatted near the toilets and stuff.
And there was this time when I went to the toilet, I vomited again.
And I felt better after that, but was very weak.
I slowly got better, like after alighting and all.

BTW, I wore my purple jacket.
I didn't find it gay, hahha.
In fact, I love it.
Though its kinda short.

We took a bus from the airport to Sunshine City Prince Hotel.
We put our luggage in their care temporarily and went to the connecting Sunshine City mall to eat lunch.
we had a super late lunch like close to 5pm, cause the bus ride to the hotel was abt 90 mins.
I ate rice with fried fish nuggets.
Couldn't finish, cause well, I wasn't feeling very well in the first place.
And the serving was big.

After lunch, we took the luggage that we wanted to bring to Mercury something something hotel at Ginza.
Left the rest of the luggage at Sunshine City Prince Hotel as we were only spending 1 night at the Mercury whatever hotel.
The Mercury hotel was linked to the Ginza train station btw.
While the mums were checking in, Michelle, my sis and I were taking pictures.
HAHAHA, we were like making funny faces and stuff.
After we checked in, bathed and walked around the nearby streets.
Took photos and bought stuff from their local supermarket.
Oh,we ate Macs too.
Thanks to my brother(: [And I'm not sarcastic about this]
Oh, after we returned to the hotel, we watched a bit of The Island before bed.
You know, the show about the clones and blah.

DAY NI:
Woke up, showered, parents bought Macs for breakfast.
They have Cinnamon Melts, its superb.
Singapore should start selling that.
After breakfast, we took train and walked a bit to the Imperial Palace.
We took lots of photos and the scenery was nice.
Autumn trees are so orange,red,yellow and nice.

After, we took a train down to Asakusa;
where the famous Sensō-ji, a Buddhist temple dedicated to the bodhisattva Kannon( Guan Yin).
We took photos there, with the huge lantern and all.
Then we shopped at the stalls near the temple.
I bought this really cute Jap doll HP strap.
And ate grape ice cream.
I know its kinda cold, but eating ice cream rocks.
oh, and my grandma went missing for a while.
The mums went to find her and found her eventually.

After that, we took a train back to Ginza and walked to Hakuhinkan Toy park.
My cousins bought some Shugo Chara merchandise.
Its the anime I stopped watching.
Hahah.
After, we returned to our hotel, checked out.
Took luggage and sat a train down to Sunshine City Prince Hotel.
Checked in and I shared a room with my grandma.
We showered and went to eat dinner at Sunshine City mall.

This is the best part, oohlala.
I ate tempura udon, and there's this chef there.
He's sooooooooo hot, I tell you.
And he's so capable.
He does the accounts,takes orders, serves food and makes the delicious udon.
He does have a helper though.
He's like the hottest Japanese guy I saw there.
My mum agreed that he's handsome, when we went back to the hotel and my dad was sleeping like a pig.
HAHAHAHHA.

After dinner, which was like 8.30, most shops were closed.
Yeah, they close pretty early as its cold and they need to travel home and all.
We went back to our rooms, changed, watched tv, chatted a bit and slept.
Oh, I caught this program where Jap singers sang.
And heard Choosey Lover by Dong Fang Shen Qi.
My sis and i thought it was pretty good.

DAY SAN:
Macs breakfast again. -.-
Took loads of trains, wanting to go to Lake Kawaguchiko.
Some of which were wrong.
Got so sick of trains.
Finally managed to take the right ones and made our way up to Odawara.
BTW, in some of the trains, you're allowed to eat and drink as the journey is long.
We took lots of autumnlistic photos as lots of nice autumn views passed by while we were in the train.
We walked from the station to the lake.
Ate lunch at a nearby restaurant. and bought souvenirs.
Took photos with the lake and took the river cruise.
It was really cold and cloudy,so mt Fuji was like blocked.
But we could see a bit of the snow cap.

oh, here's a joke when we were there.
I was like saying that my mum always discriminates malaysia goods, saying they're bad and stuff.
And ironically, her husband's a malaysian.
Then my sister was like: "Love is blind"
And we all laughed.
Then Michelle, who didn't know what was happening, laughed too.
hahhah, hilarious people.

After the cruise, we went back to the souvenir shop to buy snacks, like mua chi and stuff.
Then walked back to the station.
Bought fruits from the station as they were cheap and good.
Got our train tickets and went on another train nightmare.

oh, in one of the trains, Michelle and my sis were having thier usual childish squabbles.
My sister went: " I'll squeeze your pimples."
then Michelle went: " I'll squeeze your freckles."
AHAHHAHA.

we went to Oktoshi station and there, we waited for half an hour to take the express train to Shinjuku.
Took another train back to the hotel.
Mum bought macs and Takoyaki for everyone as we were all too tired to eat out.
Their Takoyaki is huge and has lots of ingredients.
Aunt bought Wendy's for Michelle.
We had grapes for an after dinner snack.
After, the adults left to shop nearby.
The children stayed in.

And we cracked yet another joke.
Cause Michelle and my sis were like lying on the same bed.
And Michelle was like being all les and stuff, hugging my sis and all.
So I said, I don't know what is in her brain.
And she innocently and happily said : "Stuffed toys!"
HAHAHHAHA; cute or what.
She loves stuffed toys.

After the parents came back, we had a small tidbits party before bed.

DAY SHI:
Had cornflakes with milk and half a hot cake for breakfast.
We walked to Ikebukuro station.
Then we took a train down to Ueno station.
we walked to Ueno market.
Took photos,saw fresh seafood and bought lots of snacks from this huge provision shop.
We ate takoyaki again.

Then walked to Ueno park.
Its really pretty there too, and very clean.
As usual, snapped shots.
Then while walking back to the Ueno station, saw another takoyaki stand.
But this stall sold them smaller and in six.
we bought 2 boxes and everyone shared.
Then took a train down to Akihabara.
Everyone was expecting to find cheap watches to buy.
But it seemed that there were lots of changes and in the end, we were empty handed.
Oh,I saw two guys who dressed up as girls too.
Super gross.

Then, we took a train to Harajuku.
We had Yoshinoya for lunch.
It was nice.
Then we walked through the shopping streets.
I bought nice rubber bands with the money my mum gave me.
shopped around a bit more and then went back to take a train as everyone was tired.
Plus, its dark when its only about 5pm there.

We returned to the hotel, rested a little before some of us went shopping.
Including me.
Oh, we ate crepe too.
Superb, it had mango ice cream.
I shared with my sister by the way.
We reached back to the hotel about 8.15, since most shops were closed and all.
We slacked, watched tv and caught this variety show.
There was a program on unique animals and a small box at the top right hand corner showing the reactions of the guests at the show upon seeing those unique animals.
We laughed at their faces. hahaha

After I took a nice warm shower and sang songs before bed.

DAY GO:
Breakfast was at the standing noodle shop.
Haha, you can stand and eat your noodles and the noodles are simple and cheap.
I ate Fried potato with soba, which had soup.
So, its kinda like ramen.
We went to see some temples and the Big buddha.
Can't really remember much as I didn't record in my phone.
heh.
But I bought souvenirs and took photos there.
Oh, my mum bought me this luck charm.
Its supposed to help me get good results. o.o
oh, if I'm not wrong, lunch was at Macs again.
I ate ebi fillet burger.
The fillet was made of prawns, duh.
Its nice! SINGAPORE MUST HAVE THAT TOO.

Oh, then after we left the temples,we shopped around Ikebukuro.
And we had dinner at the hot chef's shop.
hahha.
Didn't get to see him much that day as his super capable female assistant was around.
She practically did everything besides the cooking.

Then, I shopped around the mall with my aunt and Marilyn.
And I realised to my surprise, that my aunt listens to 91.3 FM.
Which means, her fav song is Hot and Cold and she knows Womanizer and let it rock.
WOW.
She's older than my mum BUT my mum's still Classic 95 FM-ing.
But my mum's still awesome,she'll buy the foundation make up I need for the concert.
And she's going to my concert together with my sister to support me :D

DAY RUKU:
We ate breakfast at this shop, you have to buy coupons from the vending machine.
I ate Katsu Don. :D
Michelle ate that everyday o.o
Talking about vending machines, Japan has vending machines everywhere.
Selling drinks, snacks and cigarettes. o.o

Last day,we merely shopped nearby and at Sunshine city mall.
I bought an orange pen and blue pen :D
Starting to like orange quite a lot :D
At 1.15, we took a bus to the hotel.
I was talking to marilyn throughout the whole journey.
She's seldom so talkative.

When we reached the airport, we went to eat macs.
To enjoy the cinnamon melts for the last time.
hahah.
Then we shopped around at the stalls, bought some snacks and all.
Then we waited to board the plane.
The plane was delayed for super super long.
Waited for connecting passengers, blah de blah de blah.
I caught Cars, meet the robinsons, Eragon and abt half of Miss congeniality.
I realised that cartoons are awesome.
They always make you smile, and they're always so heart warming.
I guess I'm still a kid who loves happy endings.

And dinner on the plane was good, rice with beef,chocolate cake, apple juice.
YUMMMMM.
The service was pretty good too, they kept providing water for the passengers.
Touched down about 1 am.
Took taxi back home, brushed teeth, changed, slept.

Yesterday,
Had practice.
Ariel wanted me to perform for first half as well.
which meant: Throw in the purple gown, purple rose choker, make up, court shoes and sacred songs.
And I'm like wow,okay.
Practice was not too bad, had to catch up with the rest as they made changes to the moves and positions.
I'm no longer first row anymore.
Second row now, but I have to lead my row onto the stage when the performance starts.
yikes. I pray I wouldn't step on my gown and fall or something.

okay, its like such a lengthy post and my sis is probably sulking big time.
She wants to use my com to play pet society.
She got influenced by me, so did Michelle.
HAHAHAH.

And, I've been abandoning my Heroes, its time to catch up.
Goodbye, and thanks for those who supported me in my and the choir tagboard battle.
You guys rock big time.

I'll end off with more awesome Japan pics.

This one's hilarious. HAHHAH.

Me and Michelle. (I didn't fail english, its just that I'm first, counting from the left)

This is funny too. hahha. It was up on the wishing board.

I love the toilet bowls in Japan. Cause you can adjust the seat's temp,you can make it spray water to wash your butt,its awesome. hhahaha.

Made by that hot chef. :DDDD

Signing off with a touch of love.

You won't bring me down today.

2008-11-11T23:32:00.002+08:00

Today's practice was full of dancing and singing and being drama.
Abba songs are so fun.
Look forward to Mamma Mia ; its the last song and the best.

Juniper was conducting the whole practice today.
Every time I screwed up, she'll give me one of her that kind of smiles.
And she shifted me to the front.
I must practice super a lot in Japan so I won't screw up and spoil the show.
I must grab this chance that the Choir and God gave me, so I can shine for Him and make Him and my parents proud.
Though they ain't coming.
But I'll feel a sense of accomplishment hearing the claps anyway :D

And I told them about the dream I had about Juniper.
(Don't ask me why, I seriously don't know why I dreamt about her)
And Yi Bin said I had wet dreams about Juniper?!?!?!
I DIDN'T OKAY. COME ON.
I know Juniper's a good role model, doing well in Choir,academics and aesthetics;
but I don't get wet dreams about anyone, PLEASE.
But Juniper's cool.
Choir has so many great people, feeling so great with them :D

Something stupid happened tonight,
its partially my fault.
But how on Earth did you guys get my dad's number?
Shan't talk about it anymore;
and your words pierce no more.
I won't let you bring me down, not anymore.

Tired throat, tired feet.

2008-11-11T10:32:00.002+08:00

Practice started at 9am yesterday.
I reached early for once. :D
Never sang so much in my entire life.
We sang sacred songs till noon.
They weren't easy okay.
Especially Regina Cae li, there's a part when you have to drag and it goes gradually high.
Can't really manage that part.
And not enough support from my stomach.
I must learn how to breathe more through my diaphragm.
Oh, and Ms Ong brought us breakfast. :D
I ate a sugar roll :D

Then I went for lunch with Anna, Zhuo Min, Evangeline,Pearlyn and Zi Yu.
We went to Tiong's KFC to eat.
Glad I made new friends. :D
I found out that Pearlyn likes Mcfly.
And that Evageline and Pearlyn reads Twilight series.
Anna likes Bosco Wong. HAHAHA.
Zi Yu always gets picked on by Ms Ong;poor girl.
Zhuo Min, I know her the longest, cause she was from the same math tuition :D

After lunch, we did the Abba songs.
And the dance moves for Dancing Queen, the part where you need to shake;
its seriously quite hard.
Don't know how April does it.
Ariel kinda lectured us, but I guess we need buck up more.
She's a great singer, seriously.

Then at about 4, Ms Ong came back and brought cakes again :D
Its really essential for us, we get so hungry from singing and standing the whole day.
Then we did the sacred songs again and Chiquitita.
We ended earlier, like 6.15 :D
But the soles of my feet were so sore.
Seriously, like you would drop down anytime.
Its like training to work at Macs, to stand the whole day.

That's why I say; when the crowd claps and shouts encore, its when we know our hard work paid off.

There's practice later on Abba songs.
And have to go check my posting.
Pray that I get my combi, then don't need waste time go appeal and blah.
And hope that Nick's feeling better, I'll pray for you.

My dad and sis were kinda @#$%%$@@ yesterday night too.
They knew I was using the Internet and if you plug in the phone;
the internet would be cut.
Then they keep plugging in the phone and say like I use whole day or whatever.
I've been at choir for the whole day, can't I like use the com relax for a while?
And when I use @#$%%#@$ doesn't mean crude language, just that I don't know what words to use.

And Celeste, we'll see about the meeting thing okay, I'm leaving for Japan soon.
After I come back then plan okay?
:D

Going Keane-rocking; Torres-loving.

2008-11-09T09:45:00.004+08:00

Woke up to another wonderful Liverpool victory against the West Broms.
3-0's coolio.
Keane's koolio. HAHAHA.
And Torres is back,with a new hairstyle.
Terrific.
I like his old mohawk hairstyle.
SEE THIS:

Hot right?

Spanish guys can seriously melt you.
Fabregas is another one, gosh.
Did you watch the interview after the game with him and Gallas?
Goshhhhhhhhhh,help me.
HAHAHHAH.

Yesterday night,we were at NUSS clubhouse again.
I caught a bit of the Man U vs Arsenal game there.
I caught up with an old friend too.
I smiled a lot:D
And no,Ke Jia,I'm not attached.
Hahah,the waters at your school seem quite poisoned too.
Be careful okay. Hahha.

And,it was nice having that phone conference.
Though it probably burned my phone bill.
We should do that more sometime,when I get a new house phone.
And,I'll try my best go look for Alicia.
Hahha, I don't know much people there you know.
But they seem so close already.
The girl's overseas,still use prepaid card sms him.
Hahahah.
Luckily,I don't need to do that man.
I shall have an autumnlistic holiday at Japan.
Can't wait,hahhaha.
MY PRETTY TURTLENECK AND JACKET.
WHEEEEE~~~~~~~

Oh, of course I went to church too.
Nicholas accepted Christ:D
Everyone's happy for him.
And through yesterday, we all decided to spread about the Word.
People deserve to know about the good news,don't they?

Yesterday morning,I spent my time using the computer and finishing some math homework.
Cause I was alone at home while the rest of the family went water playing at the Zoo.
And my aunt,who's in Canada, called back.
What a time :/

And now,my phone lost its heartbeat.
Its dead.
Its spoiled.
Its beyond repair.
And my aunt was supposed to call back today! :/ :/ :/
Hopefully they come online on Skype.

Friday night, we had guests over.
Uncle James, auntie Pauline and her mum.
They are related to my aunt who's in Canada and they know my grandma.
Uncle James was friendly and funny.
Auntie Pauline was nice too.
They bought cakes over,so nice:D
I got complimented again,feels nice :D

Friday afternoon,was practically burning time.
Don't know how we did it either,but we did it.
I almost got into trouble when I came home,but it wasn't bad.
No worries.
Luckily I managed to pass the ticket.

ANDDD,I'm happy I managed to get another supporter to my Musical Evening.
Hahhha:D
I'll see if I can go look for you people during intermission or something.

If you want things this way;

2008-11-06T12:31:00.002+08:00

I don't know what to do with you okay.
If you don't want to tell me,fine.
If you don't want me to talk to you,fine.
If you want to learn to be independent and live without me,fine.
I thought by pointing out that you're childish,you would grow and change.
Seems not eh.
Throw away the lighter, candle,brothers,smses and calls.
They all just go down the drain in a spilt second.
And when I said bye,I meant it.

I finished Heroes episode 18 finally.
I know I've been duper slow.

And, Jonas is so right la.
I can't believe my bio sucks.
hahhah.
He says my problem is probably just minor difficulties with heart expansions.
So I shall just exercise and stretch more.
hahhaah, I feel so stupid.

Got practice this afternoon.
Its scared songs again.
Well,at least the last 5 mins,is one of the mamma mia songs. :D

Till my last heartbeat.

2008-11-05T20:41:00.003+08:00

Let's start with last night.
My brother vomited.
My mum blamed my dad saying stuff like don't know how my dad help him brush teeth,brush until vomit.
Then my dad got pissed with my mum shouting back that since she's so good,she can brush my brother's teeth next time and saying that she always pushes everything to him.
And my mum scolded me for not spending time with my brother and playing the computer the whole day. :/
And,my mum wanted my maid to use newspaper to clean up the vomit first;
but my maid just used the towel straight away, adding to her fire.

So,I spent some time with my bro after things calmed down.
Talked to him,played a bit.
He bit my finger!
I was trying to see if he really would. And he did.

But,I couldn't really sleep last night.
Cause I was feeling so scared.
I was crying before I slept.
You know me,my imagination always runs wild.

Cause recently,my lower part of my heart aches sometimes.
Its just like short but quite sharp pain.
Experienced quite a bit yesterday.
and I let my imagination run so wild,until I was imagining that the doctor would tell me I only have 3 months to live.
And I was trying to do all the things I haven't done and spending time with my loved ones.
And I'll still get the heartaches and I'll pass out.
And end up in hospital and everyone would crowd around me crying.
And before I die they'll fake a smile.
And at my funeral,they'll be saying all the nice stuff.
And seriously,I got so scared.

God,please tell me its just a case of being over paranoid or not enough exercise and not some heart disease.:/

But today was better,
I only felt the pain twice and my lung capacity smallen in the morning.
Spent my whole afternoon shopping with my mum and sister.
I guess retail therapy really helps.
Hahha.
I bought lots of stuff,felt happy.
Except the part when someone made me feel so extra.
I still remember okay.

Dinner was spaghetti at home.
I'm so lucky to have my grandma.
I'm going to treasure everything and everyone from now on.

I find myself,falling deeper into your trap than you into mine.

Regaining radiance.

2008-11-04T19:54:00.002+08:00

I'm recovering. :D
I was down with flu,running nose from Sunday.
I felt so :/ :/

And yesterday during practice, I sounded quite off tune. :/
But the seniors were nice to me; just ask me to try my best.
We did like the scared songs yesterday,like Regina Cae Li.
It kept playing in my head after practice.
But those are difficult songs.
Luckily I'm not on for first half of Musical Evening.
No purple gown,no rose choker and no singing difficult songs.
Just be drama,go retro and sing Abba songs. :D

Today was quite a slack day.
I woke up at 5am cause my throat was very irritable.
I was tossing and turning in bed, coughed a little.
Then I decided to get a cup of water.
I laid on the sofa for a while then decided to go back to my room to sleep more.

Nothing much significant,
I tried to start on watching Heroes Episode 18.
Keep getting distracted and my brother and sister keep disturbing and all.
I talked on the phone for some time,
then when my grandma came home, she scolded me.
So,I put down the phone.

And,I got some stuff done.
I swept the living room floor;
I packed my cupboard;
I packed my jewellery box;
and painted my nails. HAHHA.
I know I sound vain and bimbotic.
But there was seriously nothing much to do.

My mum is at Lot 1 shopping, I think she's going to buy long sleeve shirts for me.
YAY, new member to my colour coded clothes cupboard. :D

Maybe if you pray hard enough, your wish might just come true.

Liverpool's still the love<3

2008-11-02T11:48:00.003+08:00

Saturday night.
I can't believe it.
The stupid team who lost to a triangle won the unbeatables.
Stupid Redknapp.
I WANT MY TORRES BACKKKKKKK ):
It wasn't supposed to turn out this way.

Manchester United is getting back their pace. Ronaldo-.-
Chelsea's coming back too. Anelka-.-

PTTF, I stayed up till about 2 to watch soccer okay.
I'm going soccer crazy.
and I got some sleep from 1 am to 1.30 am on the sofa.
My dad only woke me up after Kuyt's goal.
Luckily,they replayed his goal.

okay,let's jump back to Saturday morning.
I realised that my parents pushed the going to malaysia thing to today :D
We went to Orchard,cause my sister needed to buy long pants and my mum needed to buy new sports shoes cause I'm wearing hers.
My sister is like wearing size 30 pants. So scary :/

My dad sent me to church, I was late cause of him.
And made my friends wait,so sorry. :/

Church service was special, was all about orphans.
How they are made used by brambles,becoming kid soldiers, becoming slaves.
I felt so sad for them.
I can't imagine how its like for them.
So,I tried searching on the net to find out info on Singapore orphanages.
There are no orphanages in Singapore,I found out.
Most of the children are taken care of by a designated caregiver whom are either their relatives or person assigned by the relevant groups or family service centre. But there are plenty of welfare organisations that takes care of children from low income family or disadvantage family.

So,I guess the easiest way to start is go to my brother's school to see if I can help.
I know they are might not be financially poor and all, but I guess helping children who are different from us is good too.
I'll go down on wed,when my brother has swimming.
His school is at Yishun.
Anyone want to join me some time? Hahaha.

okay,after service,went home to bathe.
Then went to my brother's gym as usual.
And went to NUSS clubhouse again.
We only ate at 8.35pm.
We were all so so hungry.
After dinner,just slacked around, watched a bit of the Everton match.
And you know what happened to the matches I watched after I reached home.

okay,I guess my mum's right.
I shouldn't have stayed up so late.
And I shouldn't have cried over that small parents thing.
Cause I started to have running nose. :/
Felt so dehydrated,dry lips,dry throat.
And my nose hurt.

We went back to malaysia yesterday.
Left about 4.30.
Came home about 8.30.
Bathed,used a bit of the computer and went to sleep about 10.30.
I kept waking up at night,cause my sister wasn't beside me.
She couldn't sleep without aircon,so went to join my grandma.

This morning,
my nose is hurting more than yesterday.
I don't have medicine,I know I shouldn't be relying so much on medicine anyway.
I have practice later, hopefully,I'll survive.

You caught me off guard,

I'll do anything; just not to be dragged to malaysia tomorrow.

2008-10-31T20:59:00.003+08:00

My parents just bombed me by saying they want to bring us to malaysia tmr.
ALWAYS like that.
This time,they say cause my brother's passport is new,so need to go stamp so the authorities won't think its fake.
How ridiculous.
GRRR.
To think I planned stuff nicely a week ago already and now they just have to spoil it.

I'll control my emotions to the best I can;
I know I have to honour my parents.
But,really,I'll do anything to not go to malaysia tomorrow.
Its a rare chance that through me,someone gets to get closer to God.
Oh man;I prayed hard,that my parents' decision would change;
or they'll go without me.

Today I had porridge for lunch and dinner.
Quite bored of it.

Today was a slacking day too;
though I finished a bit of math.
Feeling of accomplishment,hahahha.
I know Anna finished all the math already. o.o
SO FAST!

And practice yesterday was good.
I felt more confident. :D
I think I'll only get to perform in second half,but I'm glad enough. (:

Musical Evening details:
Crescent Chorale.
22/11/2008
Yong Siew Toh Conservatory
7 p.m.
$15.
ASK ME FOR TICKETS. COME SUPPORT(:

And people,don't celebrate Halloween okay,
Its hell's new year's day.
So Happy Halloween is super ironical.
I'm not blaming you,Jie'r.
I know you didn't know.
I didn't know till Jonas told me too. :/

Patches of nightmares.

2008-10-30T09:54:00.002+08:00

Today, I woke up earlier, about 9.05.
Cause I was afraid, afraid that those nightmares might come true.
I sound kinda childish, but I'm serious.

To start off, in the middle of the night, I felt something weighing against my chest, physically.
And I thought it was part of my nightmare.
I felt kinda scared, and I woke up.
To realise that my sister's head was the weight.
She was sleeping on me! GRRR.
Then I tried to get her head off, and she woke up.
She moved over to her own side of the bed and we both went back to sleep.

And I started getting patches of nightmares.
I call them patches cause they don't link up.
The first one was that I was in Burger king with a couple of friends.
I remember only one, Thomas, he was with me.
He's my primary 1 & 2 classmate, haven't been talking to him for ages.
I don't know why he was in my dreams.
Anyway;in the dream, I bought the food for him and he bought food for me and it turned out that I didn't like what he bought, he didn't like what I bought.
We both laughed it off.

Then, I excused myself to the toilet.
In the toilet, I washed my hands and met 3 girls.
They were strangers.
Then, we noticed 4 $2 notes on the side of the sink.
They were deciding whether to take the money.
I was thinking inside also. (!!!!)
Then everyone snatched for the notes and each person got 1. (!!!!)

okay, after that, the scenes changed.
It was a class chalet, for my primary 6 class.
Everyone was having fun, and my teacher was in the backyard.
She was digging a super big hole in the grass.
And she filled it with water.
She announced to the class that it would be a swimming pool for us.
But she didn't want it to be overcrowded;
so we had to take turns, go by index numbers.
And in the nightmare, my index number was still 39.
So I decided to go to take a nap, since I was the last batch.

After my nap, I woke up to see that there were ODJs and Our Daily Breads on the side of the windows and cupboards. (!!!!)
I felt amused in the dream and I decided to wake up and check the situation outside.
I went outside and my teacher said that everything was over.
Like the swimming pool thing.
And I was super angry and sad cause I felt ostracized.

And I dreamt I ran away from the chalet and I reached this cave.
I became a cartoon character. (!!!!)
I dreamt that inside the cave, there were bad people and this monster caught inside a cage.
The monster looked disgusting, black and had disgusting mouth.

okay, and I don't why, the other cartoons and I wanted to send food into the cave for the bad people.
We loaded the food on little trains.( we're cartoons, don't forget)
And apparently, we poisoned the food. (!!!)
But, the bad people were smart and before the food even reached into the cave;
we saw the whole group of bad people on a bus.
And the bus was just speeding straight past us.
And all the cartoons were like OH NO! and started running along with the bus.
And we were running and running like mad.

After this scene, I woke up.
I didn't dare sleep on.
I mean, if you know me well, I'll ALWAYS laze on the bed after I wake up for as long as an hour or so, eyes closed.
But today, I didn't dare,really.

In the nightmares, I was snatching for money with people, I was being ostracized, I poisoned food, I saw some monster, I was running like mad, and I saw those ODJs and Our Daily Breads.
It was scary in a way to me, and I felt so guilty, that I never had disciplined to read the ODJ/ODB daily.
I didn't want things to turn out that way, its just so scary. :/

And, I read from Goal.com that Liverpool won 1-0 against Portsmouth;
thanks to Gerrard's penalty.
Second love, Gerrard you rock.

Surprising surprise

2008-10-29T23:11:00.002+08:00

Today, my place cut the electricity and lift service. :/
My grandma had to climb up 16 floors and she was carrying a lot of stuff :/
She was like half dead, couldn't talk, very weak :/

There was no internet connection, no fan, no heater. :/
My dad asked me to bring my sister to study at Lot 1.
She has higher chinese paper tmr.
She kept getting distracted.
Charmaine Bay and I were doing discipleship beside her btw.

Today, I got surprised when I was at the library.
I was supposed to take people by surprise, and you got to me first.
I'm sorry, I was so taken aback I forgot to thank you.
HAHHA, thanks for the gift anyway.
Luckily, I'm still young and I have a strong heart.
Thanks two years of hockey, you saved me from the surprising surprise today.
HAHA, now where did you get that idea to suddenly appear from?

and, my dad scolded me for going for discipleship.
I thought he meant I could do discipleship. :/
He always takes Catholics to compare with Christians.
And my catholic grandma would add on to support saying catholics are better.
I'm not saying catholics are not good.
They are good in their own way, but you can't make me believe in something I don't believe in right?
And my dad doesn't want me to go for anything Christianity related other than service. :/
Oh man, oh man , oh man. :/

Confusing myself once more.

2008-10-28T23:12:00.002+08:00

I'm confusing myself again.
I wonder what's wrong with me sometimes.
I don't know how I feel or think sometimes.
You seem like you're going to just put away everything.
But I guess its good for you?
I can't expect anything more, can I?

I'm just looking forward to Saturday, and the future times we talk over the phone.
Its nice, although I realize we stone sometimes.
And did you know that my dad kicked me to make me put down the phone just now?
Don't worry, it ain't parent abuse, don't need to call 999.

Practice today was okay.
Joey didn't come.
I made new friends though. :D
We're singing Mamma Mia(YAY.); Money money money, Chiquitita and Dancing Queen for Musical Evening.
We did those today, and we learnt the actions too.
Cool eh, I bet you guys would laugh when you see our actions.
HAHAH, we're going retro for Musical Evening.
Musical evening is on 22nd November, tickets going at $15.
I hope I get enough practice by then.

And Sarah, I know you probably won't get to see this, but I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to imply such a mean remark. :/
You can say me back okay? :/

Zoo Visit(:

2008-10-26T20:15:00.002+08:00

This morning, my parents brought us to the zoo.
I had my own card done(:
And its pretty much the same, just that the Children's world went through major renovations.
There's like a mini wild wild wet there now. hahah

Oh, and you can take boat rides from the zoo to the neighbouring waters, which should be Seletar resevoir.
I always think that the waters look so nice, with the greenery at the banks.
I miss Macritchie Reservoir. :/
Haven't been there in a while.

And, when we were passing by the llama exhibit, we saw a couple llama mating.
I dont have much to say about that, I took a photo though.
I mean, its not always that you see such stuff.

We went to see the cheetahs too.
And there was this picture of this woman from the Mursi tirbe.
She had this plate in between her lips.
And a young woman's bride price was determined by the size of the lip plate.
Her mouth was so stretched open, I wonder how she even talks or eats.
I can't imagine myself with a plate between my lips. :/

After the zoo trip, we bought KFC home to eat.
Damian, my cousin, came over.
He went home to get some beer and chips for tonight's big game.
WAHAHAHA, Chelsea Vs. Liverpool.
Come 9.30pm, they'll battle it out on the field.

Anyway,I went for math tuition.
We did indices AGAIN.
And I forgot to take my water bottle with me, was so thirsty. :/
After math, went to lot 1 with my parents and brother.
My mum went to redeem a marble cake, I went to popular and bought 1 A Math book and 1O level Chemistry book.
I met Jing Jie and Yu Ting.
So coolio; Singapore's so small. Haha.

Chinese tuition dragged till 6.30pm.
It was our last lesson for this year.
I'll miss my teacher. :/

Dinner at home included fish ball& meat ball soup; nuggets;sausages and rice.
And I'm going to upload my cousin's spastic photo on facebook soon.
WAHAHAHA.
He doesn't have much face on facebook anymore actually.
There's this video of him singing some hokkien song.
Well, two sentences of the song actually. HAHA.

And you know, I saw this guy at my brother's gym yesterday.
And he was speaking good english and he sounded awesome.
I want to be like that too.
I'm going to try my best to speak good english
No more singlish for me(:

Well, I'm not going through a very tough time actually. Main problems are my parents and my brother. So don't worry about me, I'll get by. (: Cheer up okay, I think we'll go further being friends.

Clarification.

2008-10-25T12:16:00.002+08:00

Okay, I thought we said before that I'm Cloud, you're sky.
Laura's case, I have nothing to say.
If you don't want me calling her sunshine, fine.
But there's a problem with calling you sky too?
Seriously, I don't know what to say.

Well, I don't know if you call it intuition or sixth sense.
But yeah, I kinda felt it from the start.
And, I'm glad you think maturely.
Really glad. (:
Can't wait till we go to church together(:

okay, its back to my Heroes now.

I still think I owe a sorry, I'm sorry.

First day of holidays.

2008-10-24T22:15:00.002+08:00

First day of holidays, boring start.
I woke up 9.40am today.
I had breakfast, helped my brother to start up my tablet.
I took over after a while.

Today was basically a using com-sleeping-marking my sister's assessments-spending time with brother day.
Kinda boring huh, and its the first day of the 9 week holiday.

Heroes is getting so nice. (:
Onto episode 11. :D

And I think someone's daoing me.
WHY?!
Just cause I forgot to change my status to sleeping before I left?
:/

Tmr's saturday. YAY:D

I LOVE 2S1<3

2008-10-23T19:29:00.006+08:00

The last day of school ):
After clean and green, almost everyone was crying,hugging and saying goodbye.
It was such a sad sight.

Here's personal dedications to everyone in the beloved class of 2S1'08:

Agnes;
I remember there was a period of time when we were quite close. I won't forget the times. When we wanted audition for Crez Awards and all. Your voice is quite good, really. I wish you all the best, I'll miss you. And btw, why does your chinese rock so much? Sometimes I get jealous. HEH. :D

Sheena;
I remember the period of time when I was with you, Xin Yi and Adele. Those times I still remember. I'm sorry for leaving that time, cause I felt unaccepted and out. I won't forget your laughter and your Korean drama loves. :D

Angela;
Though we aren't very close, I'll remember your funny ways.You're always so happy and full of nonsense. HAHA, but that makes you funny:D Hope you'll continue doing well in your studies. (:

Belinda;
I don't know where to start, there's so much to say. I remember that at the start of last year, we were friends. You made me skip some part of classes with you sometimes, and you refused to eat anything else besides wan ton mee. HAHA. I won't forget all the things we've done together, the movies, the laughter, the times when we had the same reactions, said the same things, studied together, took the bus together, took photos, got into trouble, the zoo trip, EVERYTHING. And I won't forget that you're the friend that made me cry the most number of times. Though the arrival of Laura and kkml made us grow more distant, I'll still remember you,LP,Sky(: I hope you won't dao me. ): Hope we can still take bus together and have breakfast together occasionally. I'll miss you loads. (: ):

Xinglin;
this year, you were my group's PBL leader! HEH, I think you did a pretty good job(: I know we aren't close, but I still wish you well for the future, may God bless you(:

Janice;
the sleepyhead. HEH, you're always sleeping in class. And surprisingly, you never get caught. HAHHA,but I hope you can try getting more sleep at night. Its bad to sleep in class, you miss out SO much. I wish you the best in your future studies and your NCC stuffs(:

Li Juan;
I know I haven't been mixing with you much for the past 2 years,I remember you like May Day! And I remember that coincidental meeting at West Mall quite some time ago. HAHA, wish you well in everything you do. (:

Clara Chin;
just want to say sorry for leaving. I guess I couldn't fit in with you guys. I won't forget the times we had, with you guys spitting ice at people, laughing and saying sarcastic stuff. And you guys making fun of me. :/ HAHHAHA. BTW; stop thinking you're not good at hockey okay. You are! Train hard, and win the B divisions. I'll be supporting you guys all the way.

Yik Lam;
CHEWING GUM. HAHHA. I know I ain't very close to you, but I remember that you like Thomas Daley?(Hope I'm not wrong.HAHA, forgive my stm.)Won't forget your laughter and how I sabo-ed you that time by calling number 9. HEH. Thanks for being such a good math rep btw. Wish you all the best with NCC and your studies(:

Josephine;
I won't forget your powerful singing voice. Those awesome songs you wrote, and how you go all drama. I'll remember you dancing, your horse riding pictures and you playing on the piano. I'll wish you all the best overseas, you know we'll miss you loads. (:

Clara Lee;
FISHIE. HEH. I still remember. The times we had together. You're a nice friend, and you know, I really hope you'll manage your time better between canoeing and studies. REally hope you'll do better next year, I know you can do it!(: I'll remember you wanting to be a housewife, and the wonderfully delicious cookie you baked for me and the others. Hope you'll stay happy always(: And, all thanks to your constant efforts, we won Cleanest class award.(: Really a potential housewife huh. Your future husband's lucky. HEH:D

Audrey;
thanks for being a nice CME rep(: I don't know you much, but I wish you all the best with Band and everything else(:

Sheh Hoon;
although I'm not close to you, I'll remember that you always sit behind me during morning assembly(: Wish you all the best with Badminton and your studies(:

Xin Yi;
I'll remember the period of time when we were in the same clique and your loud talking. HEH(: And you canoe so well! Hope you continue getting medals!May God bless you in everything you do(:

Jeslyn;
YOU SMARTY PANTS. HAHHA, you're still a part of Dark Angels you know? We haven't forgotten you!I know we'll still see each other at house comm!:D Hope you'll continue getting good grades and smile always, okay(: AND, you need to speak up more. Don't be so quiet all the time. :D

Joey;
NEW FELLOW CHOIR PARTNER. HEH. Luckily, I'll still see you in choir. We're in alto, YAY(: I won't forget the times when we went for movies with Belinda(: And us taking photos(: You must eat more okay, you're seriously so skinny. Felt so weird to hug you. HAHHA. Must remember to study hard, don't play all the time. May God bless you(:

Wei Shan;
WU ZUN FAN. HAHAH, I bet you watched Butterfly lovers too. I heard you're quite zi-lian too. HAHHA, HI-FIVE. Its okay you know, really. :D And I admire your computer skills, I don't understand Photoshop(okay, just a slight bit is understandable), Dreamweaver and all the other computer softwares. HAHA. Wish you all the best in everything you do(:

Adele;
BIG JONAS BROTHERS FAN,LOVER OF JOE JONAS. I really hope your dream comes true, yeah? HAHA, I'll be waiting for your wedding invite. :D Thanks for the advice the other day, I'll study harder next year. Be careful, I'll catch up soon:D And, thanks for being there for me when I was down. You know you rock right? (: And, I remember your words, must go out together someday okay? PROMISE ME(: Really hope we can study together some day, and when that time comes, I'll help you with your chinese okay? I'm so sorry for not helping you before the exams. ): I'll miss you lots.

Laura;
TOY AND DOGS LOVER. We had lots of fun together, sharing secrets and all. I won't forget those times. I used to blame you a bit, for causing Sky and I to be more distant. But now, I feel you're a great friend. Thanks for all the laughter and fun. I won't forget those. YOU ROCK LOTS, continue to bring sunshine to others' lives all right? Really hope your mum would let you out more often. Remember me like how I would remember you all right? Loves<3

Si Hui;
I'll remember those sarcastic comments you made about me. HAHHAH, just kidding. Thanks for the hug today, I thought you didn't like me after I left. But your hug cleared those doubts. (: I hope everything will go fine for you, I won't forget those memories I had with you and Clara-s.

Wei Chi;
though you're already gone, all of us still treat you as part of 1S1'07/2S1'08. I hope you're doing fine at SJI(I) Can I emphasise once again that I LOVE your school uniform?! HAHA. May God bless you in everything you do(:

Deborah;
GENIUS. Its so sad that you're going to NJC. Its okay, I'll study hard and meet you there next time if possible. HEH. Well, I know I haven't very close to you, I still
wish you all the best. I won't forget that you love Pooh bear and Doraemon. I think Pooh bear is so cute too(: You cried so much today, don't cry anymore all right?(:

Desiree;
GOSSIP GIRL FAN. HAHA, can I say that I like your specs? Makes you look all business woman-y. HAHHA. I know you're smart, hope you continue doing well in your studies.(: Thanks for being such a nice treasurer too. (:

Hong Yi;
I must admit you were smart to realise I was talking about you in my little speech I gave. And I'm so glad I used the chance to say that I was sorry for being bossy. And when you said you were sorry when you hugged me, it felt like all the negative feelings were gone in an instant. But you know, you really can be fierce sometimes. HAHA, wish you all the best in everything you do(:

Zi Qi;
ANIME LOVER. I'll remember those funny stuff you say, and the funny actions you do. You're really an interesting person. Try not to sleep so much in class next year all right, sleepyhead? Wish you all the best for your studies and for NCC. GOODBYE, SERGENT!

Shin;
DANCER. I'll remember you as a passionate dancer and a fellow "opponent" in chinese. HAHA. Thanks for the note btw(: I'll remember you, don't forget me all right? Keep in touch(:

Naomi;
I'll remember the times we had remedials with Ms.(sharks, I forgot her name.) I miss her loads, wonder how she's doing at NTU now. ): I'll remember the special way you laugh too.(: May God bless you in everything you do. Jia yous for your math yeah? If I can improve to a 60+, you can too!

Beverly;
I'll still see you in tuition! HEH. We've known each other for 4 years. WOW. HAHHA, I was shocked to see you in the same class on the first day of school last year. HEH. Hope you'll still talk to me in tuition. Don't dao me okay? HAHA.

Wan Yu;
MY PREVIOUS DESK MATE. Sorry for shouting at you sometimes, I really don't mean it.
I miss talking to you in class. Really hope you'll do well in your studies in the upcoming years. I know your chinese is kinda bad, if you need my help sometime, just call me or find me at my class all right? I'll see if I can help in any way. (:

Annabelle;
Though I don't know you very well, hope you continue to perform well in canoeing and your studies(: May God bless you:D

Jia Ying;
HYSTERICAL SCREAMER. HAHAHA; I won't forget your screaming and laughing. And that you were in my PBL group this year!Wish you all the best with NCC and everything else all right? (:

Wen Qi;
FELLOW D&T MATE'08. Just want to say, I'm sorry for venting my anger and frsutration on you sometimes during D&T class. Just that D&T gets so pissing, hope you understand. :/ And, I still remember that I went to your house sometime this year and ate your maid's lasagna. She cooks well:D All the best in everything you do, take cares(:

Charmaine;
SMILING GIRL. You're always smiling, except today. You were crying so hard. I know its hard to say goodbye to your friends. But cheer up all right? And I won't forget that Belinda calls you a Straight Freak. HAHAH, dont worry, being straight is not freaky. (Its the other way round. HAHHAH) May God bless you in everything you do(:

Theng Hui;
Chairperson & Chelsea fan. You've been S1's chairperson for 2 years. Thanks for putting up with all our nonsense(: And, watch out okay, the Blues are really going to get the blues when Torres leads Liverpool to get the trophy. HAHA, its a fair competition(: I won't forget the times when you pass me the attendance file and say "Nah." HAHAH. I don't blame you, at least you help to count. HEH. All the best:D

Eva;
I know I ain't very close to you, but still wish you all the best in your dancing and your studies. Hope to be able to take part in similar events like Musical Evening(:

Jie'r;
I'll miss you a lot a lot. I'll miss Miso too. I'll remember those pretty korean guys you like:D I miss your hug too. I'll remember the bus rides, the breakfasts and you comforting me when I cried. You rock loads, hope we'll still go out sometime(:

Lynn;
FLUFFAYEEEE. I'll miss you so much. )): You being cute and going I'm fluffy. I won't forget you, hope you wouldn't too. I'll keep all those memories, close to my heart. Those times when we took pictures, those times when we went out, those times when I went to your house and watched Heroes;those times when we pretended like we didn't want to friend you and you would hug us so tight and give your innocent face. I really hope you'll wake up and see, what you're doing with Anthony. I love you loads, don't want to see you get into trouble all right? Take care, I wish you all the best. <33333

Jeralyn;
You're really good at hockey, I must say. Continue to work hard and win all right? But don't forget your studies! May God bless you in everything you do. And don't cry anymore, your face was all red today. :/ Cheer up(:

Zehra;
I'll miss you. Your bimbotic ways, your great speeches,your vulgarities, you going gaga over some guy,I'll remember them all. I just hope you'll do well in your studies in the future. You rock lots. :D Hope we'll get to go out again someday, that day at KAP was funny:D

2S1;
I won't forget all the times we had, the time when we tried to surprise Mr Poon, the times when we teased Mr Goh, the times when we made Mr Choy so upset, the times when we made Chen lao shi cry, the times when we laughed, the times when we cried, the times when we had fun, the times when we sang birthday songs for one another, everything. You guys have been so fabulous, and I love both our class tees:D
Thanks for all the memories, I won't forget you guys <333

Phew; I finally finished.
Oh, btw, I caught Max Payne today.
Its nice, kinda thrilling.
And apparently, Sky almost nose bled.
HAHHA.
I owe her a movie trip during the holidays. :/

My eyes are tired.
I guess its due to the crying today. :/
Hope tmr comes soon.

And as we go on, we remember, all the times we had together. And as our lives change, come whatever, we will still be, friends forever. <3

If I could, I'll never want to let go.

2008-10-22T20:07:00.003+08:00

Just one more day with the babes;

I wish tomorrow would never come.
This morning, I was really upset.
There was once when Sky called me to go take photos with them and I didn't go;
cause I was wondering if they took me as a tool.
Cause I wasn't included in the rotanda photos and some others, as I was the photographer.
Well, there were photos that I was inside of course, but you know;
no one likes being left out.

I played games in class today; and they helped me to not think so much.
We had a class party today too.
With lots of chips and drinks.
I ate quite a lot. HEH.
Sad what, its a way to make me feel better.
(I don't gorge okay.)

After school, everyone left except Agnes, Jose,Laura, Jie'r, Sky, Fluffy and me.
Then we started hugging each other; saying those touching words.
Sky and I cried.
Everyone's sad about parting.
I can't imagine the days without Fluffy going I'm hot, I'm cute ; I'm fluffy.
Can't imagine the days without Laura, us sharing secrets and bu-yao-lian-ing.
Can't imagine the days without Sky, us chatting, laughing, going to the movies; having breakfast and all.
I miss 2S1 like madddd.
I'll miss my friends a lot.
I mean, besides us; who calls their friends bitch and can still be friends?

Thanks for cheering me up when I'm down.
Thanks for the hugs.
Thanks for the great memories.
Thanks for bringing joy into my life.
Thanks for the birthday and random presents.
Thanks for being my friends.
Thanks for the awesome time.
I love you;wo ai ni;sarang heyo;Ngo oi ney;Je t'aime;Ti amo;Muje se mu habbat hai.

And to those in the class who dislike me; I'm sorry for what I have done;
that made you dislike me so much.
If you could, I wish you'll tell me my faults.
I won't blame you for not liking me, really.
I thank you for the memories too.
If only I had a second chance, I'll be a better person and friend.
I'm sorry that its too late, hope it ain't deep hatred yet. :/

Cause everytime that I try I get tongue tied. I love you girls, I really do.

Goodbye's stuck in my throat.

2008-10-21T20:05:00.002+08:00

The days get more and more boring.
There's nothing to do in school.
Sighs.

Met Wei Kai on the MRT today.
I promise across my heart it was coincidental.
Well,if the cabin which I was waiting to go into wasn't full;
I wouldn't have ran into another one and saw him.
So, we talked about stuff.

In the morning after flag raising; the house leaders, 1C3 students and the hockers;
pretended to have mass run.
We ran by the video cam, smiling and pretending to chase the runners and all.
Wonder what project the school is doing.

Slacked in class again;
except that Mr Choy came in for math.
Taught us A math( Indices ) AGAIN.

Its tuesday already ; 3 hours and 42 minutes to wednesday.
There's a class party tomorrow.
Our last one, together as 2S1.
I don't want to say goodbye to Fluffy,Sky,Laura,Adele,Joey and the rest of them.
I guess parting's a part and parcel of life.
2S1; I'll force out a "Goodbye" and I won't forget that Fabulous is our middle name.

Goodbye Fluffy, can't take photos with you anymore.
No more hearing about Anthony and your fencing.
No more seeing your cute ways.
No more hearing you say vulgarities.
No more hugs.
Fluffy, don't be too obsessed with Anthony.
And I wont forget your catchphrase and you calling me a bytch.

Goodbye Sky, no more bus rides with you.
No more phone conversations.
No more lunches, no more going out.
No more taking photos, no more helping you to carry stuff.
No more car rides, no more sharing your headphones.
No more having the same reaction ; no more saying the same words at the same time.
No more hearing about kkml; no more hearing complaints about your mum.
No more going to the movies.
No more hugs.
I know you'll probably ignore me next year, I wish you all the best.

Goodbye 2S1 babes, thanks for the supercalifragilisticexpilalidocious time.

Goodbye hockey, HELLO CHOIR(:

2008-10-20T11:49:00.002+08:00

As my title goes, I'm officially in choir :D
Alto 1, the higher of the lower notes. HEH.
Luckily, I'm not in soprano, I'll get sore throat like every day?!
Choir practice was quite special I would say.
First we did breathing exercises and warmups.
Then, we sang Mamma Mia :D
Oh,and yeah, Ms Ong kinda auditioned us to see which voice parts we belonged to.

There's musical evening coming up.
I'll be singing on stage. wow.
HAHHA, its quite unbelievable myself.
Luckily I trained since primary school not to have stage fright.
Have to sell the tickets, going to get my family down to support me. HEH.
I think I'll need to wear a dress o.o
Haven't worn one in agessssssssss.

I've always been thinking of joining choir in JC.
Can't believe I'm in choir NOW.
Then what should I join in JC? HAHHA.

Today was practically a slack day;
used tablet, chatted, went to find teachers etc.
Oh, went to OG with Sky and Joey to buy Sky's Dickies bag.
I know the name sounds a bit off, but the patterns are nice.
We didn't have lunch :/
But I survived, used to going hungry anyway.
My mum says I cant have supper as often after I quit hockey. :X
More hunger pangs.

Oh, I haven't told you about my weekend.
Saturday, went to church(:
A senior pastor preached, and his laughing was erm different.
hahha, Wan lin thinks its cute.
And she's so ego. HAHHA.

After church, my parents dropped my brother and maid at his special gym;
and dropped me at Junction 8, alone.
I went to popular to see the bio, physics, geog books.
Then, went to BHG to find a pair of white shoes, and I don't mean school shoes.
Didn't buy cause they didn't have my size. :/

After that, went for dinner at NUSS clubhouse.
The new building's not as cosy as the old one.
Its too modern and big.
I want the old one back. :/
Seems like metamorphosis isn't good all the time.

When I went home, I catched the Liverpool match.
Victory is so sweeettt. 3-2. :D
KUYT ROCKED for that game.
SPAIN; they caused Torres to be injured. :/
I want him back asap.

Sunday, went for my uncle's housewarming party.
His new house is SO nice.
Its HDB, but its looks like a condo.
Seriously.
And its so near Buang Kok MRT station.
okay, I only stayed for main course, didn't have time for dessert. :/

Took the train all the way to choa chu kang for tuition myself. :/
Luckily I had my phone to sms :D
I rested my eyes too.

I was 25 mins late for tuition. :X
Math tuition was on A math.
Indices and surds. :/
I couldn't manage all though, hopefully I get a good A math teacher next year.

OH, after math tuition, I made a call to my mum.
While talking, I felt something brushing against my feet.
So, I used my other foot to like brush off whatever the thing is.
And you know what, I SAW A COCKROACH SCURRYING AWAY.
COCKROACH, BIG COCKROACH.
Surprisingly, I just continued the conversation with my mum.
Of course, I ewwed under my breath and in my head.
So proud of myself that I didn't scream. heh.

Had chinese tuition after that, it was okay I guess.

After chinese tuition, went to a provision shop with my parents to buy rice.
I can carry 2 5kg rice bags. HEH. though its taxing.

Life's kinda boring nowadays.
Oh, can't wait to meet Charmaine Bayyyyy tmrrrrr.
HHAHAH, I'm copying how she types.
She likes to repeattttttt. HAHHAHA.

Not too sure where you are, hope you're doing fine.

Strained;

2008-10-17T22:17:00.002+08:00

I'm so stressed up now, how ironic.
Its like after exams,pttf.
I can't get into the online placement website;
relationship with my parents is getting worst and worst(they get so irritating!!!);
I feel like God's so far away;
my CCA is like messed up;
I might have some hidden medical condition;
My studies are not doing very well;
I might not be able to take the combination I want;
I guess, this is the trouble that was coming my way?
Or rather, the troubleS, with a capital S.

):

I'm so stressed;
just now, my sister dropped the plastic cup.
I practically jumped, felt my heart leap.
Almost wanted to cry.

Watched Butterfly Lovers today at Lido.
Didn't know the cinema was so small :/
The male leads are good looking, Wu Zun is better(:
I cried during the show; Belinda thought it was funny that I cried. :/
Wu Zun is like superman, he could take so many blows and pain.
Heart ached when those arrows shot him, and hairpin pierced into his flesh.
Ouch.
They died together in the end; so sad.
Though I guess Wu Zun's acting was kinda fake.
Never mind, work harder kays?
(whoops, why am I seeming to like Wu Zun again?!)

I wish one day, I'll could just lay here with a smile.

YAY(:

2008-10-17T09:25:00.002+08:00

YAY(:
I feel so encouraged; getting the Most Improved for Maths in my class(:
Received a free stencil o.o HAHAH.
We're going through the math paper now, boringggggggg.

Sighs, I got shouted at by Hong Yi today.
I guess not everyone is in a good mood;
with the release of results and choosing of combinations.

And, I'm becoming bitchy and vulgar.
Desperately need to change.

Don't fall into my trap, for I hurt people.

Choked;

2008-10-16T21:05:00.002+08:00

I choked and coughed my lungs out during dinner.
Stupid ikan billis; stupid throat):
I think I'm falling sick. (I thought this very long ago, pttf.)

Sighs, I don't know what subjects to take;
I'm scared I'll regret.
God, please show me a hint, show me the light, which combination is best for me.

Please, don't tell me what I don't want to hear.

Combination headache):

2008-10-16T16:28:00.002+08:00

ARGH; can someone just tell me what subjects to take next year?!
Pure geography or pure lit?!
Chem-bio or chem-physics?!
I can't seem to make up my mind; its driving me crazy.
I want combination I.
No pure humanities; and triple science.
Darn; why didn't I do better in science?
I got a stupid 56.

And I heard geography ain't going to be as easy.
I mean; I got 64.5 for geography.
If it ain't going to be easy, what am I going to get next year?
But seriously, I don't think pure lit is for me.
Its so unstable. :/
I don't want to think about it anymore, so shitty.

Anyway, yesterday was quite dramatic.
Everyone was depressed, results released.
And, a big hooha was stirred up.
I hope everything's fine now, girl.
Be strong okay, you'll be fine.
I love you(as a friend), God loves you(:

I have to pluck up my courage to face Ms Ang tmr.
I need to tell her I want to quit.
She's going to scold me like mad; but whatever.
I'm not staying in hockey.
Not, not, not.

I need to remember to check out how much the tablet battery costs too.
My memory sucks big time.
Someone nice, remind me please?

I was late for school today. :/
I haven't been late for school in ages.
Have to write 300 word essay, waste my time.

I was bored shitless in school today without my tablet.
There was nothing to do.
My sister has E-learning and my house computer is dead.
So I had to leave it at home for her to use ):
Tablet's my loveeeeeeee. Can't live without it.
I don't even love my hp as much, its sleeping in my dad's locked up cupboard now.
Cause my bill burst till $80 and my dad confiscated it. ):

I'm broke, I need money.
I'm tired, I need sleep.
I'm hungry, I need food.
I'm stinky, I need showers.
I'm stupid, I need to study.
I need prayers; blessings; hugs and love.

Cause I'm doing fine on my own.

Friends brighten up days.

2008-10-14T18:09:00.002+08:00

Through today, I felt for myself how important friends are.
Friends cheer me up so much.
I was like super sad last night and this morning; but Fluffy and Sugar made me happy again(:

This morning, I forgot I had to be in school early.
Had a bad night.
My dad got to know that I didn't do my D&T design journal.
He asked me about it, I said I lost the book and I didn't care; since its D&T.
And my parents started scolding me for my bad attitude.
But I guess I have to agree with the being rude part and everything.
So now, I bet they think I'm a problem kid with a bad attitude, who only knows how to hug her computer all day, MSN and SMS.

I know I shouldn't shout at them and all;but ain't their expectations like high?
when my mum accused me of taking her watch, they expected me to help her find.
Like HELLO?!
Let's say someone said you stole their stuff, would you help them find?
Pttf.

I mean, other 14 year olds can MSN, SMS, talk on the phone,and I can't.
And the last time I heard my parents compliment me was who knows when.
They don't care whether I get hockey medals or do relatively well in exams.
So, there's no motivation at all.
They don't care anyway.
They never support me in anything I do, be it hockey or religion.

Damian tells me that I'm dead wrong to think that my parents don't love me.
But, how does parental love feel like?
Cause I don't know anymore.
My heart's numbed.
I cried last night, I didn't sleep well.
My head hurt this morning, I was so sleepy.

This morning in the train, someone just had to kick me when I was down.
So much for being there all the time for me.
Turned everything into lies and past tense in a split second;
and wanted everything to return back in the next.
I teared 3 drops of tears in the train, I'm such a loser.
Because people never fail to make me cry.

Well, we had interhouse cheers today.
Keller came in fourth. ):

We had A math bridging course today on indices.
Sucked.
Bored me so much, I listened a bit, took down some stuff, took photos with Sugar.

Deeparaya concert, I got to understand how malays and Indians feel during CNY.
I couldn't understand a thing.
The concert was from 12.45 to 2.15.
So long. :/

I went for lunch and burnt my tongue while eating congee.
How sucky is that?

I'm hungry and tired.
Sick of everything.

Results are released tmr, wonder how badly I'll do.
I wonder how shitty my life can get.

By the way, Ms Ang wants to see me tmr.
I bet she'll ask me if I want to quit hockey.
yes, I do.
I'll be in choir, doing what I like most, singing.
I'll sing my lungs out, till I have no more voice left.

Its car free day tmr;
can't wait to see fluffy and sugar(:

Acquit me not guilty.

2008-10-12T21:30:00.002+08:00

Acquit me, your watch isn't with me.
I told you a billion and one times, I didn't take your watch.
And you kept insisting its with me.
You searched my bag, cupboard and apparently it ain't there.
What more do you want?
I hate it when people falsely accuse me.
You don't even trust me.
You're my mum, if you don't even have that basic trust in me, I wonder who does.
I sweared and teared like an idoit.

I used tonight to pack my study table and cupboard;
turned the anger into energy.
Well, at least I got 2 things done.

I went back to Malaysia for a few hours btw.
Had a headache on the way back.
Still had to go for chinese tuition. :/

I'm tired.
Just so tired.

Have to be in school by 6.30 tmr to discuss for interhouse games.
I'm quite positive I won't get to be house capt. anymore.
Less stress anyway. :/

Freak, my mum is still complaining to my grandma that I talked backed to her.
She thinks I can't understand hokkien?
She's so wrong.

Someone's going on council retreat.
Byebye, come back soon.
One less person to talk to contributes to loneliness and boredom.

Happy birthday,cousins(:

2008-10-11T23:27:00.003+08:00

Here's a dedication to Damian and Pei yi.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU GUYS(:

Damian: You're officially 7 years older than me. HEH:D
And, I loved your Liverpool cake. Why did you need to cut up the flag?!

Thanks for being such a nice cousin, I know you care(:
Really hope your studies in australia would turn out awesome, and you'll find yourself a great girl.(:
Happy birthday, I'll miss you when you go to australia after CNY.

Pei Yi: Happy birthday, though we don't talk much, I wish the best for you.(:
Hope your studies would improve and people wont bully you again:/

Today, I had a dream.
My dreams usually start when I'm about to wake up, so they're always kinda short.
Shan't talk about it, lest someone starts ego-ing again. HAHA.

Well, I was woken up to go bathe and prepare to go to my aunt's place.
I was tired, was bathing half awake.

Went to my aunt's place and watched heroes.
I didn't see the gory part of Claire coming.
And, okay, stop comparing the coolio-ness btw One Tree Hill and heroes all rights.

Went to Hyatt Hotel for my cousin's birthday lunch buffet:D
Didn't eat a lot though, girl's stuff, shan't start on it.
Plus,the spread was kinda weird.
No cakes. :/
I WANT CHEESECAKE. MISS IT LOADS.

And, Hyatt Hotel has this super nice waterfall(:
And My aunt complimented me a lot today, heh.
She's a nice woman. :D

After lunch, my parents refused to send me to church.
Said there was no point, since I was already so late.
Can't wait till tuesday, meeting Charmaine Bay at West Mall.
Take the hint, candle. HAHA.

I came home, used the phone and napped.
I stank when I woke up.
Really. Smelled like sweat and all.

And Celeste, don't care about those girls.
I mean, there's bound to be people like these who gang up and bitch about you;
but they're just wasting their saliva; don't bitch back.
It'll just make you the same.
They'll get sick of it, once they're done.

Well, I guess this is it.
Btw, WHY IS THERE NO LIVERPOOL MATCH TODAY?!
I WANT TO WATCH THEM PLAY.
(okay, I sound like some spoiled brat. :/)

Goodnight,

Jumper.

2008-10-10T20:24:00.002+08:00

JUMP.

Hahhah, I watched Jumper at a friend's place today.
Coolio, If I could jump to wherever I wanted to, I wondered where it'll be.
Japan to eat the authetic jap food?
Go see the Eiffel tower?
Go visit the most beautiful beaches on the Earth?
Take photos of the grandest churches in the world?
Jump. Jump. Jump.

Oh, I tried guitar hero today too.
I suck at it big time.
But, it was nice to try.

Oh, and the chicken rice was nice. Heh.
And I won't forget that huge German shepherd which barked at me so much.
And the pokes and the fruit plus(If I get diabetes, I'm dragging you down.HAHA)

Well, at least it wasn't that bad an afternoon.
I spent the morning watching heroes,its such a coolio show;teaching my bro.

After I came home, I bathed, dinnered and marked my sister's science assessment.
Putting in an effort to be a good sister and pass time you know.
HAHHAH.

Gotta go look after my brother now.

JUMP.

Heroes.

2008-10-09T21:29:00.002+08:00

As I walk on that guilt path;

No school day, marking days are excuses for the teachers.
Well, students love them anyway.
I woke up at 10 am, after receiving an sms.
Used the computer, talked on the phone.
And Internet's getting boring.
And pokemon crater can't be played anymore. ):
I miss squirtle. ):

Anyway, I took a bus to Lynn's place in the afternoon.
Watched some episodes of Heroes season 2 with Lynn and her mum.
Its such a complicated coolio show.
HAHA; I'm going to start from Season 1.
After that, we went to Bukit Timah shopping centre to eat. :D
Went to some korean shop, I had chicken cutlet and ice lemon tea.
Lynn's mum was so awesome, to treat me.
She's nice(:

Sky came, and we went to rent CDs at KAP.
We rented White Chicks and watched at Lynn's place.
It's kinda funny and stupid.
Those bimbos are really kinda brainless. HAHA, whoops. No offence.
Sky and I left in the middle of the show.
We took bus 170 together.
There was once, the bus jerked and she crashed towards me.
I think she almost stepped on my foot. haha.

And when I walked back from the bus stop,
walked on the path which I killed the snail.
I still feel kinda bad about its death. :X

At dinner, I told my dad the triangle and Tottenham joke.
He didn't even laugh, thought it was lousy and should be changed.
What a generation gap.
See why we don't communicate much.
I'm jealous of those who have cool and fun mums and dads; whom they can tell everything to.
:/

Cant wait till saturday, going to my cousin's birthday lunch.
I'm going to go up to him and say:" You're officially 7 years older than me.Happy TWENTY FIRST."
HAHAHAH, I'm evil.

Sighs, I'm feeling so :/ :/ :/ :/ now.
This stupid emo thing coming out of no where.
Spoiled party mood.
Make me laugh.

Even the ghost of a good mood is gone.

Takeoffs and memories.

2008-10-08T23:27:00.003+08:00

Hellos, missed me?
Haha, goodbye livejournal, I didn't know how to change your skin.
Its kinda late, too lazy to blog.
But hey, the exams are overrrrrrrrrrrr.
Screwed up science today, electricity is so :/

I guess everyone else enjoyed their afternoon.
Though I was kinda tired, but it was still nice.
The wind, the food, great(:

Too lazy to type more, but in short, Its party time:D

and, thanks for the blogskin,it rocks socks. :D

CHANGING;;

2008-09-11T12:17:00.001+08:00

I'm moving ;;

from here to Los Angeles.

Cause L.A's the place you go wild.

(ps. its praiseparade.livejournal.com)

See you guys;

Gotta catch a flight. Duh, not literally.

Remember to leave comments; there's no tagboard at L.A.

Stomach flu.

2008-09-09T18:47:00.001+08:00

Their words razor-sharp through my heart.

I took the train today, cause my dad wanted to send me to the station. I missed the 6.18 train, so I wasn't at Bukit Batok at 6.20-6.25. Sorry to disappoint. HEH. I was squashed like crazy when I entered the train at JE. So, while the train was travelling to Bouna Vista(I think). Something happened. Then this old man beside me kept fanning the air, trying to get rid of the stench. Then a fat, punk malay woman was like talking on the phone(in malay) but I could understand bits and pieces (So don't try insult me in malay, I ain't that stupid.) I was super hurt I tell you. I didn't mean it, all rights. I'm unwell. Even the doctor gave me pills for stomach wind and gastric wind. Blame it on my stupid stomach, forever getting the flu. Not as if I like it having the runs everyday. I feel disgusting and dirty too, okay. URGH; Stomach, I'm telling you, I want a break up. :( URGH. I want a new stomach, which doesn't get stomach flu so often. :(

D&T is such a waste of time.

Math was a breeze, probability is like the easiest topic.

Lit was free period, Miss Li didn't come. :(

CWO(weeding) after school. Sucks. I wanted to meet up with Charmaine to do discipleship. :( Weeding meant squatting in the hot sun, plucking out(which equals to killing) the weeds in between the tiles of the parade square using our fingers. My knee caps hurt like crazy from all that squatting. && I was falsely accused. HMPH. Don't want to talk about it.

LORD, Please, cure me of this stomach flu. I promise to treat it better, don't punish me like this. :( In Jesus's name I pray, Amen.

Playing emo kid.

2008-09-08T16:14:00.001+08:00

Don't rush is the key word.

I played emo kid yesterday, was dressed in black and grey. I wasn't really emo, just wanted to wear black. Went to Lot 1's macs for lunch. My stomach still wasn't feeling well, so I couldn't really finish my food. I skipped math tuition cause I really needed to sleep. I went to take the math worksheet though. Slept till about 4. Then I quickly prepared for chinese tuition and my dad sent me there. Celeste said I did look like I just woke up, I guess it was my messy hair.

Chinese tuition was fine, the teacher was sharing with us about the movies, Sixth Sense and The (Big)Fish(?!?!) Quite fun to hear about her sharing though. After tuition, my parents brought us to have a japanese dinner(: The usual place, Waraku Restaurant(Marina).After eating, we walked around a bit at Marina Square. I realised I've never been to the second floor even of Marina Square.

After we reached home, everyone prepared for school/work and had a early night. I couldn't get to sleep after quite long, cause it was still bright and I was sleeping on the wrong pillow. Still got to sleep in the end luh.

This morning, I was all ready for school. But I realised I still had the runs. Thus, I didn't go to school. I went to see the doctor. Same thing, stomach flu. He threw me pills as usual.

Sighs, feeling the end-of-years stress already. Must studyyyy. Its streaming. If I don't do well, I'm doomed. :X

It isn't just a dream.

Sick much.

2008-09-06T18:54:00.001+08:00

I'll just let the story unravel.

I really understand how important food is to someone now. Thursday during training, I didn't eat enough for breakfast. I survived through the warm-up rounds and basics, though. Couldn't take it after that, cause I felt weak and my stomach felt super weird. I guess cause it was too empty. Coach let me stopped training. I went to lie down to rest. Not to mention before training, I knew my stomach wasn't in good condition, since I had diarrhea(somehow, its becoming more frequent.) After training, I took train home myself. Reached home about 3.30. Ate rice with soup that my grandma cooked. I ate like 5 meatballs, they were super nice. I can't remember what I did after lunching though.HEH. Forgive my STM.

Yesterday, I felt sicker. I always thought I was quite strong, since I never fall sick though I play hockey/walk in the rain. However, I woke up with a major backache. It was aching so bad, I spent most of my time lying down. The Tiger balm plaster that my grandma stuck on my back didn't even help. I felt feverish, but my house ran out of Panadol. I woke up at 10+, lazed around, watched TV. Went to bathe and finished at 11.30. Then I went to sleep. Came out for lunch when my grandma called. I was eating like a snail. ( hope you guys caught the effect I was trying to make. HAH. ) I couldn't make myself finish, so I just left the table and went to sleep again. I woke up about 2.30. Talked on the phone till 3.30. Slept again till 4.30. ( Gosh, I sound like a pig.) Lied on the sofa and watched 黄金年华 with my grandma. After that, that draggy Taiwanese show played. I left halfway;; to sleep again. Not too long later, my uncle came to pick my sister and I to his house.

I guess you can guess what I did in his car. Slept again. My uncle drove to fetch my aunt at Velocity. She bought Roti John. When she opened the packet, the smell made me want to puke (No offence to anyone). I held back, tried to not breathe. We reached in a pretty short time. When I reached the house, was greeted by my younger cousins. As usual, Michelle came to hug me, but I told her I was sick. Then I went to sit on the sofa bed, to rest my back. Oh, and My aunt gave me a pill to eat. I know I shouldn't rely on medicine, but, sighs, I don't know how to explain myself. BTW, My cousins' house just finished renovating. And it looked pretty nice.

My younger cousin, Michelle's pink cupboard. Her wallpaper is grey with lots of coloured flowers. I think it looks sweet. (:

I found this on the table beside the sofa bed. I aren't a fan of purple, but this guy looked act me so innocently, I guess I melted a bit inside? hahah.

Didn't have much for dinner. I didn't have appetite. I went to the table and picked up my phone randomly. Then I realised my ring tone was ringing so I answered the call. I talked a while on the phone then went to use the computer. After a while, I realised that my fever had gone down. It didn't take long for my backache to disappear miraculously too. (PRAISE!) Oh, I was smsing LP in the process of using the computer too. Heard she's getting a new dog. And she's pretty happy about it. I guess Laura feels happy too. Oh, I talked on the phone for some time. My aunt's so nice, she didn't scold. The first time she came into the room and saw me talking on the phone, she just giggled. The second time, which was quite long later, she just said 5 more minutes smilingly. After the call, I went outside to drink milo and eat cookies. I ate everything in the glass bottle. There wasn't a lot okay;; I'm not that piggish. hahah. Had a nice sleep at eleven till about 9.40 this morning.

I was super hungry when I woke up. We went to eat prata and iced milo. After that, we went the airport to fetch my parents. When we reached there, the rest of them walked around in cheers. I wasn't feeling very good so I sat on chairs outside. After a while, we went basement 2. They went to NTUC to walk a bit. I took some photos of the Cadbury chocolate corner.

She's not very pretty, I guess thats why she won't melt. HAHA.

See, chocolate is good for you. Not too much though.

Then they went to the bookstore. I sat outside once more. I went to the toilet thrice while at the airport. My cousin bought Twilight. I said I'll borrow when she finishes, to see if its that amazing and if Edward Cullen is hot enough to make so many girls go crazy over him. But, I wonder when she'll finish la.

After they bought their books, we went upstairs to meet my parents. My sister ran to hug them, I couldn't make myself run. My dad hugged my so tight, my bone hurt. My mum's was okay. My dad, mum, sister and I left in a taxi. My uncle drove my cousins to my house too. I slept in the taxi. Upon reaching home, everyone was eager to get their gifts. My mum was like santarina, giving out so much stuff.

I have: 1 dark grey slippers, three reddish shirts, 1 brown tights(I don't know why they bought them for me), I key chain with my name, I tube of M&M, one round container of sweet, one jeans and one bag(I haven't seen them).

At about 3.30, I went to sleep. Woke up about 2 hours later, eye-ache and headache. Feel so naggy typing all this. SO I guess I'll just stop here.

:X Sorry for missing church, though I think I could have made it in time, but I wasn't feeling very well. Didn't want to go there and end up running to the toilet or wanting to sleep.

I'm sorry

2008-09-03T14:27:00.001+08:00

I seek Your forgiveness over and over again.

Teachers' day Celebrations;;

The concert was not bad, especially the skit and the "in the classroom" dance. After celebrations, took bus with Claris to CCK interchange. It was such a stupid, big waste of time. We were waiting for someone and in the end, she left in a taxi. HMPH.

In the end we reached CCK like super late. Met Lois, Celeste, Keegan, Shawn, Shakthi, Ern Chuen and Livia at Lot One's macs. We ate and then walked to DLSS together. When we reached there, most of the people were either, playing basketball, volleyball, soccer, table tennis or just walking around aimlessly. I was one of those who were walking about aimlessly. I mean there was nothing to do.

I left about 2 plus with LP and Joey to Lot 1. We went to the arcade for a while. Then we watched Wall.e together. It was a pretty sweet animation I would say. Just that meeting someone there spoiled the mood a bit. But, I still enjoyed myself. As usual, we cam-whored a bit. Really, it wasn't as much as previous times when we went out.

These times we spend together, we capture them on film.

Saturday,

I skipped training. Went for church earlier cause we needed to prepare the birthday celebrations for the august babies(Lay Guan, Charmaine, Rachel and Adina. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!) Everyone was jealous of Lay Guan's red shirt, specially designed by Wan Lin. Service was about fasting. I realise God always plans specific sermons on the best days, so that they would answer my questions.(: I stayed for cell, when we ate the birthday cake(Chocolate Royale) and I had discipleship with Charmaine. (((: I learnt a lot, I've always been wanting discipleship. (: Reached back home about 7. My cousins were still around. Ate dinner and I used the computer as usual.

I'll skip sunday, super boring and same routine.

Monday;;

I went out with LP(: To orchard and BPP. We went to Cathay to eat at Hot Dog Factory and do work at the same time. Then we took a bus to Far East Plaza to shop around, (since I haven't been there before) LP bought a blue checkered shirt, which looked good. We cam whored a bit at the fountain. Then when we walked out, LP saw this hot ang moh guy then she keep taking photos of him. haha. After that, we went to BPP. We sat in Macs, bought a drink each and ate fries too. We did some work together,before leaving. Oh, I almost got into a car accident cause I crossed the road without looking. LP was like " OIIII" Then I "ahhhhh" and ran back to her. {Praise God for letting me live on.}

Yesterday, had training in the rain. We did a lot of passing, from one end to the other, passing in threes and stuff like that. I went home alone. Came home to eat spaghetti that my grandma cooked. Watched a little tv and spent the rest of the time on the computer and writing some notes. I was on the computer till like 9 plus, when I received a call. I was on the phone for hours. My grandma wasn't very happy. Oh, I think I'm a bad grand-daughter, daughter, sister, friend, person. I guess no one's righteous.

Today, sunshine and LP came to my house to do CS podcast. We're using some ideas from Forensic heroes. (: Its a great police drama. We went to pastamania to eat lunch and then we camwhored, again. HAHAH, its good to capture memories on film, you know. I yawned so many times, I'm going to sleep later. Then wake up to do science paper. Must study, if not I'll feel super guilty.

Finally posted after so long, and listen to World of our own by Westlife. It rocks.

I feel it sinking in too.

2008-08-28T11:01:00.001+08:00

~~I hate to say this, but you're right. Cause somehow I feel it disappearing by the second.~~

I don't feel happy this morning, cause yes, I can feel it too. The gap's widening, cause you've grown closer to others. And hurts to know you don't mind me leaving. I can't do much to help, all I can do is listen to you pour everything out. You always think I'm thinking of him, but I'm not. I always want to help you, give you a hug to cheer up your day, but the chance never comes. You don't know how I feel inside, but I guess you wouldn't want to know anyway. You're so sure of me leaving by next year, so maybe I'll leave with a hurting heart once again. I just hope your life would be better, happier, brighter, cause you've suffered a lot. I've always treated you as a very very close friend, till the extend of being my LP. Babe, there's no reason to smile anymore.

Yesterday; woke up earlier to go to school for mass dance practice. Had mass dance practice after school too. I danced so much, my thighs hurt. We almost had to do CWO yesterday, which was weeding in the parade square. But it rained, so it was postponed.

My mum left yesterday to Sans Francisco, to join my dad for a holiday. Sweet much, I know. I miss you, mummy. I really do. Sorry, I couldn't send you off yesterday. :(((((((((

My number is like circulating everywhere, inside a particular school. I mean, can people please stop giving out my number without permission to your friends? Thanks.

There's nothing to say anymore. I'll rather let myself explode.

I don't want to leave.

2008-08-25T21:22:00.001+08:00

It was always the case of people leaving without a sound ; but girl, you made it so that you cared about me to ask me to go.

Saturday, same routine. (My life's kinda boring, I know.) I learnt about the 9th(*smiles!*) commandment at church. Its basically about lying and was quite shocked to find out that liars, murderers, rapists or all those who committed grave crimes bear the same punishment in the lake of fire. How scary is that? To think we lie so easy everyday. Btw, gossiping is also lying if whatever you're saying is not true. So think twice before you gossip/lie/say half truths/keep silence when you know the truth/play the blame game/flatter/exaggerate. Since I think everyone of us has lied before, remember to ask for forgiveness((:

& on the same fateful saturday, I cried again. ( I typed again cause I cried last fri & sat too. :S ) I cried cause I thought it was a must for me to leave. I cried cause I know you mean much to me, I've always treated you as a much better friend, even if there are grave differences between us. I know people think you're weird or whatever, but I couldnt care less.And no worries, I wouldn't ever blame you if my results suffer.Don't ask me to leave again okay, cause I'll start thinking you don't want me anymore.

Oh, and yeah, I poured out my feelings and blah to the same person. I think the person must be like feeling so irritated to have a friend who calls for two weekends, crying and talking crap. Sorry, but because I know you'll listen so I called. Thanks for making me laugh again. And seriously, your cousin has a super girly voice but he's kinda nice to talk to, since he's nine(?!) HAHAH.

Sunday was the same, I walked through the pouring rain cause I didn't bring an umbrella. So I got super soaked; I bet people thought I was mad. I thought I was mad too. I mean I actually called home and to my friend to tell them about me being stuck at the void deck of my tuition centre. I mean, what can they do? come to my rescue? HAH. I didn't fall sick though. I play hockey in the rain all the time too, and nothing seems to happen anyway.

I got back my english and lit marks today. They weren't too bad. & I knew Theng Hui would get the highest, before Mr Poon announced. She's such a smartass sometimes(its a compliment btw(: )

&& I think I'm starting to get influenced by my surroundings. I used the F word today when my hockey stick hit the metal railing at the bus interchange. & I couldnt really believe it came out of my mouth like that. :S & can someone tell if its bad to use the words " I swear"? Thanks(:

Don't disappear, or I'll slap you.(maybe) HAHAH.

farm trips.

2008-08-22T23:21:00.001+08:00

oh, what the hell. I cant believe people actually mistook me for a guy? :S :S Seriously, do I look bisexual or do those people need an eye check. But then again, I think my specs is to blame. The frames make me look like some pervertic serial killer. HAHAHA.

OH, I think today is a super duper laughy day. I laughed so many times today; I lost count. Well, though morning didn't start out well(besides the fact that I scored 33.5/40 for geog. YAY. HAHA). But the start of the farm trips were the start of my laughing spree. When on the bus, Jie'R ; Laura, LP and me sat at the back. We talked and laughed at all sorts of hilarious stuff. Then at some point of the bus journey, LP said she needed to pee. And she kept repeating. Then we past by this sign which says Choa Chu Kang Cemetery. So we were like, "eh, take a photo of that signboard". So, LP leaned over the metal railing at the staircase to take the photo. Then I was like, Be Careful, don't fall, if not later we have to send you to the cemetery. Then on the tombstone, you'll see " Our beloved Belinda. Her last wish was to pee." AHAHAHAHAHAH. Then we all started laughing like mad.

At the goat farm, we bought goat feed to feed the goats. We took loads of photos of the goats. The smell of the farm wasn't very pleasant but we got used to it soon. We went to see the "bachelor goats" AHAHAH. And we're a all girls school. Do they expect us to marry one of the goats? HAHAHAHH, JIE'R GET THE JOKE? HAHAHHAH.( Inside joke; if you don't get it, too bad. HAHAH.) They gave us each a magnet souvenir and a bottle of chocolate goat's milk( Actually we paid for them beforehand. but, oh wells.) oh, then before we left the farm, we got Sheena to help us take a group photo. After two times, it was still very dark. Then Theng Hui decided to help, then when she returned the handphone to LP, she was like " nah, look at all your spastic faces." HAHAHA.

After the goats farm, we went to a vegetable farm. It grows their vegetables using hydroponics. I remember the guy passed a few stalks of parsley vegetable and told us that if you don't drink alcohol, smoke, don't drink too much coffee or tea, then when you eat parsley, you should feel your tongue go numb. If not, it means you have diabetes. I didn't eat, since I don't drink alcohol, coffee or tea and I DON'T SMOKE. & I was pretty sure I don't have diabetes. HAHA. LP wanted to test if she had diabetes, so she ate a small piece and she said her tongue wasn't numb and she was like " ZOMG, I have diabetes." Then she plucked a super big piece and put it in her mouth. After a while, she was like " Numb already,numb already, I DON'T HAVE DIABETES!" And she started dancing around. She looked hilarious I tell you. Oh, there was this plant which leaves smell like fish. Disgusting. Oh, and I helped LP win a potted plant. HAHAH, its going to be shared among us four. I then don't want to bring home. So troublesome, it might just die in my hands. hahaah. Then on the way back to school on the bus, the four of us were like using Theng Hui's "copyrighted move"- its okay, don't be sad. HAHAH; HILARIOUS I TELL YOU.

When I reached home, I bathed, ate and then talked on the phone. I laughed some more. So funny I tell you. Havent heard of such girls who are so *ahem*. Not that I want to gossip, but that girl wore a bikini which is like string tied to the back and when she went down those big slides at the swimming complex, the string came undone. HAHAH, LOSER. (oops, is that kinda mean? HAHA.) Still have lots of funny stuff, I was laughing so loudly that after the call; My grandma scolded me saying I laugh like a bar girl. So evil; how can she say this of her grand-daughter. :SSS

I can't wait till my mum goes over to America and join my dad for about 10 days. hahah, celebration time. yeah, my grandma would still be here, but she cant do much. WHEEE~~

And I tried to keep that distance, and built that wall in between. But it takes just seconds, to break that wall. Oh, what am I going to do?

FLIRTS.

2008-08-20T17:29:00.001+08:00

Hohoho; I pray they don't come near.

Lets talk about yesterday first, shall we? Yesterday, my mood during D&T was super bad. Partially because I was singing Rihanna's Unfaithful so much, it affected my feelings. Also because I was really so pissed off with someone. Seriously. When Mr Chew asked us to go over, there was this strong urge to say the F word. I said WTH in the end ; since I couldn't make myself say the F word. I think I looked so fuming mad, LP was so scared. She had her hand on my shoulder, asking me to relax. HAHAH. Do I look that murderous? But my spirits lifted after D&T; though I failed D&T. OH; I PASSED MATH! 21/40. HAHA. OMG. I CANT BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT. ITS SO BAD AND I STILL DARE TO SAY. :S BTW, I SCORED 82.5 FOR CHINESE! YAY.

After school ; we went to Peace Haven. We had a relatively nice time there with the elderly. The group we were assigned to were those who were better, as in nicer and could play bingo, eat themselves and stuff. Yeah, we played Bingo with them at the start and then we performed for them. We sang 月亮代表我的心，a part of Beautiful Girls. Jie' R played the piano. And we all danced a dance too. I kinda screwed it up. :S :S Oh, we served them their tea break too; their biscuits and tea. Some of the elderly are really cute. (:

And I think the relationship between LP and I are getting known to teachers. I think we have to be careful on how we behave next time. HAHA.

TODAY; I received my science paper back. Scored 60 marks, a B4. Not very ideal. :S I scored A for bio and chem okay. Stupid physics. BLEH. XP

oh, something real funny happened while we were walking to the Faraday Lab for science class. I totally embarrassed myself by doing something that I used to always do. I tried to change but it came back again. Haha, people involved know what I mean. (:

Oh, I met 3 ex-classmates today ; all from SJI. :S sorry, my impression of SJI guys changed from bad to worse. At the interchange; I met Shakthi. He kinda raised his head at me, like how people say whats up(I think). So, I did the same thing back, just that I didn't raise as much compared to him. His friends looked at me; then looked at him.& they were talking ; I couldn't really hear. They were in the 190 lane to wait for the bus, I went into the 307 lane; which was just beside. I was standing practically in front of them. Not like I wanted to. Cause the 307 lane was short and they were standing near the front of 190 lane. Then one of his friends(I TOTALLY DON'T KNOW) said hello, so I said hello back and turned away.Then the other friends were like"You know him too?" Then I was like " Erm, NO." and rolled my eyes. But I don't think they saw. Then they were talking among themselves, so I couldn't hear. When their bus came; one of them, who wears specs said bye. So I said bye. Then I heard the rest say: " What are you doing???" And Shakthi was like pushing them to move off. He said bye and said sorry. And I replied with an "Its okay." HAHAH; It was kinda stupid to me. Oh wells; whatever.

all the time, I feel so confused that I never want to face the truth. All I know is that I hope you'll change for the better. You can do it, I know you can.

Cry-ey friday night.

2008-08-18T08:54:00.001+08:00

I won't forget those times we had together.

LP; Joey and I watched Meet Dave at Lot 1 on Friday. It was a 3.15 show so everything was done in a rush. We didn't manage to eat lunch, so just bought bottled drinks and chips. The show was alright, though I don't really watch English comedy. Cause English comedy nowadays always revolves around sick stuff. :S But Meet Dave's different. Dave and his people are aliens, which came to earth to get back some stone of theirs. I remember there was this part where a beggar shared his blanket with Dave and I said " Aww" ; then this guy who was sitting behind me laughed(according to LP). haha. Very funny meh.

After the movie, the three of us went cam-whoring at the cargo lifts place, on the third floor. We were snapping away, taking photos with all sorts of poses. Just when we were having fun, this small boy came in. We thought he wanted to take the lift or throw something in the bin. In the end, it was neither; he just walked out. Then the air started to smell real bad, and then it struck us. He farted. And he came in just to do that. Gosh, you don't know how much he polluted the air. It stinked so badly I tell you. I was like: " What did he eat????" LP bet he ate onions. HAHA. We had to like shift places two times cause that guy stinked the air up so bad on the third floor.

After we took enough photos, we walked around a bit. Oh, we took photos at kiddy palace too. Haha. LP bought a few rubber bands at Aries. Then we all went to the bus stop. LP left first; had to bring Joey back to my house to get her stuff. And I found out that she's kinda scared of guys. :X Don't be, though I know a lot are jerks( Jeez, hope I don't get thrashed) but I'm sure there are exceptions(:

Night time was horrendous. Totally spoiled the fun mood. My mum received the phone bill. I saw this coming actually. My smses exploded to 837 smses I think. Which is an average of 30 smses a day? My mum took my phone, she said she would take it for 3 months and this time she was serious. Then she said " And no church for you tomorrow." I was like: " WHY??" And she just unreasonably said: " No church means no church." I was super sad about not being able to go church. I walked out of the room and went to read magazines. I was planning on skipping dinner and not drinking water. Hopefully I'll finally get to taste the feeling of fainting. However, my grandma made me eat in the end. After eating, I read more magazines. And my mum chose this time to talk to me. I talked back at first and my mum was like: " So, is this how you retaliate? Does church teach you all this?" That sentence hurt me like shit; I tell you. Cause I know church never did teach me to talk back. NEVER. So, the rest of the time she talked, I cried. Oh, the tears just kep flowing and flowing and flowing and I couldn't do anything.

After she finished talking, she left. I went to my room, closed the door and sat on the edge of my red sofa. I hugged Croc and cried a bit more. I had a blocked nose and I think I wasn't thinking. I wanted to not breathe so I closed my mouth. After some time, I opened my mouth to breathe. Thats why I'm still around to type this. ANW ; Then I dried my tears and everything & went out. After a while, my dad was online from Sans Francisco. My mum told him about my bill thing and that I always talk on the phone. Then my dad talked to me and my tears flowed again. It flowed, flowed, flowed. After he talked ; I left the room and composed myself once again. I called my friend to say that I cant reply smses since my phone was taken away. To the end of the call,I couldn't control so I kinda leaked out that I was crying cause of my tone. It didn't take long for my friend to call back and ask.

So, my friend was nice enough to talk to me while the rest of the family was karaokeing and stuff. I was talking, crying and blowing my nose. I never broke down like this over the phone before. I mean, its such a horrible state to be, even if its over the phone. We talked for really long and I think it costed my friend a lot, since it was an outgoing call. Sorry for making you listen to me cry and making you spend that kind of stupid money. :S & thank you so much for being there, listening and comforting. You might think you couldn't help but actually you already did. Thanks for your concern(:After the call, I brushed my teeth and went to bed. My eyes hurt like crap.

The next day, I was woken up by my body clock at about 6 plus. The sky was still dark and all. My eyes were still hurting and tired. So I just lay in bed and closed my eyes. My brother came in to disturb about 7 plus. He went to squeeze with my sister, wanted to share pillow and blanket with her. My sister was like shouting away at him. I just continued my eye-resting. Then at about 8.15, my maid called me up, saying a friend called. I couldn't sleep anyway so woke up and prepared to go to school for Chinese oral. LP's uncle, mum and her came to fetch me at the bus stop. We went to botancial gardens to have breakfast first before going to school. I only drank a drink, and my eyes were pathetically small.

The oral was sucky. Being the last register number of my class, I had to be timekeeper for the rest of the people. Had to give them 3 mins to read the passage first, before they did the actual thing. So I had to shout " Start" and then shout "Stop" after 3 mins. I caught eye rests while on "duty" cause my eyes still hurt. I didn't want to do that job cause I was afraid people will find me bossy. But the teacher asked me to be loud, so I just did what I was told. :X The convo was difficult. Talked crap.

Went home after the oral. Bathed and Ate KFC that my mum bought. My mum brought my sis, bro and maid to the zoo while I was having my oral. I watched some Olympics programmes while eating. Like table tennis, volleyball, tennis. There's this Germany table tennis player, his name is D After that, I went to lie on the bed to rest my eyes for 3 hours; cause they still hurt. Plus, you could consider that I was waking up at normal school time. So, I "slept" till 6.30. I woke up, used the computer, watched TV and stuff.

Sunday had tuitions as usual. I finished my math questions in an hour and stoned for the next remaining hour. The teacher let us off early. It was still early so I went to buy an Oreo Mcflurry to eat. I walked around, stood outside the video shop and watched the spiderwick chronicles. HAHAAH. Then I took the bus to tuition.Had to write Chinese compo during tuition. :S Finished it fast too. Went home to use computer and I watched the table tennis Olympics match. I think Li Jia wei is pretty and can play, but she isn't strong mentally. Once she loses like 3-4 points, she gives up and starts not playing well. :S Oh well, at least we finally got a medal after 48 years.

Whenever you use that word so strong ; i wonder if it comes from the deep down bottom of your heart.

COMMON TESTS.

2008-08-14T18:31:00.001+08:00

BOO. MISSED ME?(: Its been long since I posted so ; I'll take you through the events one by one.((:

SUNDAY;

I went for tuition as usual. Met up with a friend before math tuition for a short short while. I walked home after tuition and called to talk to someone since I was bored. I found out, shockingly that I was lied to. I turned speechless. Anger set in for a while, it turned to disappointment soon. Its always like that. When I reached home, I went to my room, sat at the corner on my red sofa, plugged in my earphones and turned on the music quite loudly. I was staring out of the window, thinking. I'm sick of people lying to me. Its easy to, I know. BTW, I don't blame you anymore, you had good intentions in a way, but don't you ever lie to me again, all rights.

MONDAY;

Had no school since it was a school holiday. My mum took leave since she wasn't feeling well. I stayed the whole day at home to study. My mum took my phone since morning so, I couldn't sms for the whole day till night time. Just a boring studying day.

TUESDAY;

English and Geography common test. English comprehension was about some Red Cross thingy, lucky LP(: I was glad there was no summary. Geography was pretty okay, I crapped the answers to those questions that I was not sure of. I don't know if I should still go with my plan to take pure geography next year. Heard that it'll be tough. :X

WEDNESDAY;

Chinese and Lit common test. Chinese was quite tough actually.The comprehension wasn't very easy. And the 6 marks question is sure going to kill me. I mean, I couldn't really find long answers to the question. Then I anyhow crapped the 3rd point la. So, I think I'll sure get that question like wrong, cause for sure they expect more if they give 6 marks, but I don't think I wrote what they wanted. Oh, I just hope I don't do too badly. I need my chinese marks to pull my grades up. Plus, I'll feel super sad if I don't do well la. Its one of my better subjects. LIT, I think I wrote very short. I only used one piece of paper, both sides la, but everyone else seemed to have wrote more.I don't think I can get as high as mid-years.:(( Macbeth is so hard to learn.

TODAY;

MATH AND SCIENCE TEST. DOUBLE DOOM. Science was not as bad, I realised at the last minute that I drew my ray diagram wrongly. :( Physics is so :SSSS. MATHS ; HAH. Don't even talk about it. You know, when Mr Keong saw the paper and asked Mr Choy : " What are you trying to do? " Mr Choy replied : " I want to kill them." :(( So, my grades are most probably dead too. *knitted eyebrows* *sighs*

Oh, but today after the tests, took bus with LP to BPP. Met up with LP's mum, which is my mum-in-law? HAHAH. ANW, LP's mum treated us to KFC for lunch(: Then; LP's mum went to buy a new telephone cause their's spoiled. Then, we went to the Singtel shop. LP and her mum bought a new HP each. I just stood there. My sling bag was so super heavy; my shoulder was aching like crap. After that, I took LRT to CCK. I passed by you-know-who's house ; to be exact ; I passed by it 3 times this week la. HAHA. I missed 307 again when I walked to the bus stop after alighting from the LRT. So, had to wait pretty long.
Have been using the computer all these while, copied down some D&T notes.

Can't wait till common tests end tmr. Hope my mum allows me to go watch movie. Haven't caught any of the nice movies recently.

Je veux vous voir quotidien.

I guess I'm wishing my life away.

PS. go find out what language that is. Its fun typing in other languages. HAHA. ((:

And don't use the word "love" so easily, its a strong word.

NDP CELEBRATIONS(:

2008-08-09T23:06:00.001+08:00

08-08-2008, we celebrated National Day in school. We had the usual formal ceremony, mass dance in the hall and the concert. Formal ceremony was okay, I thought the mass dance was kinda weird. NO OFFENCE, but the song's low and there's taichi moves? They don't really go together you know. The concert was okay, everyone sang loudly for community singing. oh, and we were given clappers too(: We took quite a few photos during the concert. Haha, go see them in my Facebook photo album: FRIENDS((: BTW, the hot pink FBT I was wearing today isn't mine, so don't get jealous as yet. HAHAH(:

Oh, it was the Olympics opening ceremony too. The performance was really grand, a lot of people were involved. The dancing and everything was quite nice. Heard from my mum that China spent like 47 BILLION on this Olympics. Last time when Sydney hosted it, they only spent like 1.7 billion. NOTICE THE HUMOGOUS GAP. But it was super boring when they were introducing all the countries, with their representatives and athletes walking in.

09-08-2008;

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY SINGAPORE.(: I studied today, went for service at church. At church, sang lots of songs, prayed a lot, for our schools, our families, our country. oh, I also had my first communion(: Charmaine said it was okay, though I'm not baptised yet. But even without the communion, I wont forget all that He had done for us(: I had like a 1 hour dinner, was watching the boring part of the celebration on TV. Didn't bother watching the dances and all that. Its always about the same anyway.

BTW ; I know I shouldn't be too worldly and listen to worldly songs too much but I'm just so in love with Owl City's The Saltwater Room. Forgive me, O LORD, but I can't resist this addiction. :D

Oh, & I wont be posting as often due to common tests. Gotta work really hard this time. CAN'T FAIL MATH AGAIN!

somewhere there's a happy affair, the ghost of a good mood. { LP, don't worry, I don't blame you for having an affair, so long as you don't dump me. HAHAH(: }

THANKS.

2008-08-06T10:35:00.002+08:00

YESTERDAY MORNING;

I wasn't feeling very happy, due to something that happened during math class. Didn't smile after that for very long; even if I did, they were weak smiles. But I cheered up when 2.30pm came.(: Spent quite a nice afternoon, though a word filter would be better; but seeing you, its impossible you'll filter your words. So I'll just learn to live with it. Thanks for the time anyway(:

Last night, my mum took my phone again. It was just lying in front of me on the table. I had to cut off a phone call, abruptly. Sorry. :X I treid to recall the number, since I only saved it in my phone, but couldn't remember.

This morning, took 960 then 132 to school. I was worried I would be late okay. But luckily, when I reached the Tanglin CC bus stop, I met LP and Jie' R(: I was so relieved, cause it meant I wouldn't be late after all. Since they are never late. I was closing my eyes on the bus, trying to catch glimpses of sleep. I don't know why, just very tired today. I was sleep-walking while walking to the canteen and back. But I was holding LP's arm, so I wouldn't bang into anything.

Recess was crap. I was so tired, no hong kong noodles AGAIN , & Lynn and Zehra were crapping away. Like seriously. I asked them to shut up so many times. Obviously they didn't listen. They were acting like surfer dudes for one moment, saying their usual sick stuff and all the crap. URGH, it gets on my nerves sometimes.

The class owes me $3.80, for the walking signboard materials.

Can't wait for prize-giving ceremony later. I like getting medals, who doesn't? Then we can take our last few C' Div '08 photos together(:

the times we spent together. (:

VICTORY

2008-08-06T10:15:00.001+08:00

(THIS IS TUESDAY MORNING'S POST.)

YAY. YAY. YAY. YAY. YAY. YAY. YAY. YAY. YAY. WE WON STC. WE WON STC. HURRAY! IT WAS A PRETTY 2-NIL WIN, BOTH GOALS SCORED BY NADIA THROUGH SHORT CORNERS((: Everyone got to play and everyone did relatively well.(: We were so happy after the match, we screamed, we hugged , we cheered. It was a really great game, and we felt so happy!(:

After the match, there were a lot of hilarious stuff. Like our captain had some special treatment from my coach. AHAHAHH. && She was cinderella for a while, though her prince is really not very ideal. HAHA, NO OFFENCE. Then, when we went to Red Hill MRT station to have a mini bubble tea party, our captain was on the phone. For super long. Her tone didnt seem like she was talking to her mum, though she kept claiming so. Then, there was a time when she became agitated and she totally blew it. She was like: " YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID??" HAHAHA, YEAH RIGHT. MUM INDEED. HAHAHHHA. Then, Jia Qi, Aqeela, Nadia & her wanted to go for dinner to celebrate. Then she asked if they mind that guy and his 2 friends tagging along. Then she was like, "oh, just nice. One friend for Aqeela and the other for Jia Qi. Nadia can be alone." So I shot back, " So, you're automatically pairing yourself up with that guy?" HAHAHAHHAHA. Then the others went "ohhhhhhhhh." & " Nice one, Amanda." AHAHAH.

OH, MY 20-YEAR OLD COUSIN CAME LAST NIGHT. He brought pizza and cake to celebrate our Grandma's birthday. && you know what, I almost went bonkers trying to help him solve his relationship problem. 20 year old asking a 14 year old for help, on relationship problems. SEE THE IRONY. GEEZ.

CASE STUDY.

GUY. 20 years old. Yet to finish studies. Holds a job that pays hourly at LTA, so not yet a stable job. FULL OF NONSENSE. VERY LAME.(NO OFFENCE, HAHAH) Good in studies, helpful, blah de blah. Overall, quite a good guy.{NOTICE I DIDNT MENTION LOOKS, HAHAH. NOT WORTH MENTIONING. NO OFFENCE. HAHA}

GIRL. 22 YEARS OLD. Studying for MASTERS, obviously smart. PREFERS OLDER GUYS CAUSE SHE THINKS THEY ARE MORE MATURE. Yeah, she's a nice girl.

{they were together before, by the way. Broke up cause she thought my cousin isn't mature. Actually, she isn't much more matured either. SHE WATCHES SPONGEBOB ON SUNDAY. GOSH.}

The girl's mum asked my cousin how he felt when he heard that the girl prefers older guys. He didn't know how to answer asked me for help, on the basis that I scored more than him in PSLE. I was racking my brains okay, till my head turned hot. LITERALLY. My forehead and cheeks were hotter than usual. Then once, he passed me his phone to type a draft.So I typed: " I don't know what I was feeling" ; && I ACCIDENTALLY SENT IT TO THE GIRL'S MUM. I SCREWED IT UP BIG TIME. I WAS SCREAMING MY HEAD OFF, THEN WENT TO SCREAM INTO MY PILLOW, BIT MY FINGER, FELT LIKE BANGING MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL. I PRACTICALLY FELT LIKE I RUINED HIS LIFE.

We thought of another sms to back up the previous one, and it turned out quite okay. PHEW. If it didn't, I feel super bad. Seriously, his problem is so korean drama. Relationship problems are so hard to handle. ANOTHER REASON TO STAY SINGLE. IF YOUR COUSIN'S PROBLEM IS THIS HARD TO HANDLE, CAN YOU IMAGINE YOUR OWN? I CANT.

& I COULDNT SLEEP THE WHOLE NIGHT. I was tossing and turning. I tried to close my eyes as much, but just couldn't go to sleep. & the funny thing was, I was tired. I yawned twice; while I was supposedly sleeping. SO IRONIC. Sickening.

YOU BETTER MAKE IT UP TODAY I TELL YOU. HAHHA.

CRESCENT HOCKEY C'DIV '08. THANKS FOR LETTING IT HAPPEN(:

FIRST COMBINED CHURCH SERVICE(:

2008-08-03T18:57:00.004+08:00

YESTERDAY MORNING; HAD TRAINING AT DELTA.
Had a minor sunburn, cheeks were reddish.
But its okay now.

YESTERDAY AFTERNOON; FIRST COMBINED CHURCH SERVICE ATTENDED.
IT WAS GREATTTT.
Lots of people came, the 2nd storey hall was so packed, some people had to stand outside. Including me, Serena & Adina. hahah.
After some songs, the girls & the guys were separated into two different halls.
But before that, Pastor Daniel was so funny.
He was like, "We're separating the guys and the girls & today we're going to be X rated, whatever rated." HAHAHAH.
SO, the girls got to go to the 3rd storey hall, WE HAD THE FIRST ROW SEATS(:

Sister Wan Ping talked about a lot of stuff, basically on the 7th Commandment:
You shall not commit adultery.
Though we're still like young; but she linked it to other stuff like BGR.
& I learnt a lot.
God is so amazing okay, He always gives me the answers needed at the exact time & always helps me see the light(:
LET ME SHARE((:

GIRLS ; WE DONT NEED BOYFRIENDS. GET THAT IN YOUR HEAD.
Dont you think we're still young & being single is great?
You get to save money, time, effort & can do a lot of other things.
The male attention required & yearned, you can receive them from God((:

DONT FOLLOW THE CROWD.
Just because everyone else has a boyfriend & does all sorts of behind the scenes stuff, it doesnt mean you have to too.

DONT BE IN A RUSH TO "AWAKEN LOVE".
Dont rush into a relationship, God will bring the right guy at the right time.
All you can do now, is enjoy being single & wait(:
His plans are perfect & they will work out.

GIRLS; DRESS PROPERLY.
Cause if you don't, its as good as wearing flashing neon signs which say:"LOOK AT ME HERE." (THIS IS QUOTED FROM PASTOR DANIEL; HAHAH. HE IS SO FUNNY I TELL YOU.)
Why would you want to attract unwanted attention by not dressing properly.
& by properly, I mean like not wearing revealing clothes and stuff.
You dont have to show to glow.{ I THOUGHT OF THIS. NICE HUH. HAHAH}

MAIN POINT: YOU CAN STILL LOOK GOOD WITHOUT WEARING SHOWY CLOTHES.
Also, we're helping our brothers in Christ to be godly men.
[they are trying their hardest to resist temptation, my pretty sisters in Christ.(:]
HAHAHAH.
& GUYS, SO SORRY, BUT YOU CANT BAN SKINNY PANTS. NO WAY I'M GOING TO LET YOU DO THAT. HAHAH. & JUST FOR YOUR INFO; GUYS, SKINNYS DONT FIT YOU. REALLY.

Thats about it; of course I left out some of the X rated stuff.
Not comfortable typing them here.
I wonder what they said to the guys.
Should try & find out.
HAHAH.

YESTERDAY NIGHT;
went for dinner with cousin's family at Grandma at a perankan restaurant at Novena.
Share with you an interesting incident.
There was this family, they seemed quite well-off.
They ordered like a lot of food.
Then when they polished off the food, they claimed that there was some hairs from some brush in the food & that their elderly mother already ate one hair inside or some crap like that.
& they refused to pay and just walked out.
STUPID I TELL YOU. FREE LOADERS.
I mean, they were making a fuss out of nothing.
& I bet they were lying lah.
The boss recognises them & it isn't their first time doing so.
This world really has ALL sorts of people.

THE FOOD WAS REALLY GOOD, but I didn't touch those that had chilli though.
Not a chilli eater you see.
PICTURES(:

After dinner, went window shopping for a while at Velocity & Square 2.
While window-shopping, my sec 1 cousin asked me why I want to go to church.
Then I was like, there are a thousand & one reasons.
& I havent even started say anything about Christ to her & her attitude clearly showed she didnt want to listen.
& I was hurt when she said:"Even if my friends tell me about Christ, it'll just go in from on ear & go out from the other."
I understood how Jonas Ng & the others felt when they tried talking to me about Christ & I treated them this way last time too. I'm sorry :(

Afterwards, we took MRT home.
My brother was making a HUGE fuss in the MRT train.
Cried super loudly, keep standing up, squatting down, bang the floor, bang the wall.
EVERYONE WAS STARING.
Turned out he needed the toilet.

TMR; MATCH AGAINST STC.
REALLY REALLY HOPER WE'LL WIN.
WE MUST THRASH THEM.
CANT WAIT TILL PRIZE GIVING DAY. :D

LAUGHED LIKE MAD.

2008-08-01T20:38:00.001+08:00

Yesterday's training was slack. It was a space issue; since the NPCC also wanted to use the basketball court.Not to mention that the sec 3, 2 & 1 hockers were all training at the small little basketball court in our school. But before we had basics in school, we went to DSC, supposedly to meet coach. In the end, we didn't meet coach, but someone unexpected. I guess we all know who, so shan't type it here, lest someone kills me for typing it here. HAHA. && I was the slowest to realise that the unexpected guest was there lah. EVERYONE ELSE KNEW FROM THE START, WHEN WE WALKED IN. BUT NO ONE SPOKE A WORD OKAY. It was until Verity said that Coach wanted us to go back to school, that I turned around, stood up & saw that guy with his friend there. Then I was like " I think I see someone who looks so familiar." Then everyone was like " You so slow, now then you know" and everything. Felt so stupid. I mean, you cant really blame me, that person was sitting on the toppest row; if there is even such a word. Who looks there, like seriously. NO OFFENCE, but I think that guy was kinda trying to act gentlemanly by rejecting a certain someone's money. People give him money also don't want. Stupid. AHAHA. & Sorry Verity, for going overboard with the teases, don't take it too hard okay? (:

Yesterday, I received my new hockey shirt & class tee. The front of the hockey shirt says: KEEP THE PITCH CLEAN. The back says: THRASH THE OPPONENTS. CRESCENT HOCKEY. The shirt is white & has blue sides. Its collared. Class tee is a normal white shirt. Front says: 2S1. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Just so you know, its that super long phrase Mary Poppins used. The back says : FABULOUS IS OUR MIDDLE NAME. & the best thing is the word FABULOUS is in RED((:

BEST PART OF TODAY WAS TAKING THE BUS WITH LP AND JIE'R. LP WAS MAKING ME LAUGH SO MUCH, MY FACE WAS STIFF. I couldn't help laughing out loud when I heard all the stuff she was telling me about Nigel. He is so stupidly funny I tell you. HAHAH. Take for example, that time when they went swimming, Nigel was swimming frog style/breast stroke. Then he went "Ribbit, Ribbit, Ribbit" all the while when swimming the frog style. HAHAHA. HOW STUPID IS THAT. & HE'S SEC 3. hahahaha. I laughed out so loud some times, people looked at me. There was once I was laughing so hard, I was almost out of breath. HAHA, then LP was like demonstrating how Nigel pushes his specs up. IT WAS HILARIOUS. LP LOOKED SO FUNNY & CUTE. HAHAH. I like the bus rides when I get to laugh like this. I don't know why, but the things that LP says sometimes are just SO FUNNY. LP thinks I'll laugh till I drop if I meet Nigel in person. HAHAH.

This afternoon, was listening to the CD Serena & my cell group friends gave me. It was on last week's sermon. THANKS FOR THE CD! They are such awesome people, knowing that I missed quite a bit of service, they got me the CD recording. ((: CANT WAIT FOR TMR TO COME.((: FIRST COMBINED SERVICE THAT I'M GOING TO ATTEND. Though someone has some scrabble competition, so don't think will be able to show up. That person owes me a lot of stuff to say, was planning tmr, but OH WELLS. I think Lay Guan will be SO BORED. BLAME THAT GUY. HAHA.

Started watching Rolling Love. I think its okay, I think Danson is quite pitiful. He's always sad & like close to tears kind. Then I will feel very sympathetic towards him. Don't ask me why, but I'm always pitying guy third parties. They're so poor thing; being rejected and stuff; ESPECIALLY IF THEY ARE LIKE REALLY GOOD GUYS, MEANS HAVE LOOKS, CHARACTER, BLAH DE BLAH. Danson shot this killer look so far in Rolling Love, gosh. HAHAH, I dont really like idolise him or whatever, but that look could really kill I tell you. *faints* AHAHA.

OKAY, GOTTA GO DO SOME WORK ALREADY.

CIAOS.(:

It just seems that you're not so good with words on some days.

2008-07-31T09:01:00.001+08:00

YAY. I scored full marks for my geography class test!((: Though actually its not much of a big deal ; since I wasn't the only one & the test was relatively easy. But still ; I'm happy(:

Another reason for celebrating ; my LP isn't given an S.O! Though she still needs to serve detention; but its a lighter "sentence". Yesterday when I heard about the case; I thought it was really stupid to push the blame on her. There were so many debates forming in my head ; to defend her if there was a need. Like seriously. I mean I felt so "urrghh" that after my LP alighted the bus; I felt like crying. Though I didn't. Must learn to be stronger like my LP(:

My phone was relatively quiet yesterday ; its going to be even quieter as the common tests arrive. But its okay; friends. We'll study & work had together ; then we'll play hard together after the exams okay?(:

Didn't eat my breakfast today ; I'm hungry.

Oh ; & I'm glad I didn't feel tired while running mass run this morning.(: & it was fun making fun of Verity this morning. HAHAH. Verity ; Verity ; I'm going to dig up all your stuff with Bryan. HAHAHA. I'll try not to spread too much if I find out any more stuff. :D

some days you're good with words ; & other days you're not.

&& god-brother ; don't think so much cause its not you. HAHA.

Failed ; yet again.

2008-07-30T11:20:00.001+08:00

Today I got back my math test & guess what? I failed it. Yes ; FAILED IT WITH AN 8/20. I actually wasted 1 mark for not writing units. But I would still fail anyway. So maybe it doesn't really matter. Though I am immune to failing math already but the failing HAS to S.T.O.P. I need trigo tutuoring ; like NOW. Cause I cant seem to see what trigo ratios to use. I guess I have to work doubly hard for common tests now ; since my dad's like miles miles away.

I wonder if I'm thinking too much.

I wonder what I mean to you.

I wonder what is in your brain.

I wonder if you know I don't like your "I don't know" attitude.

I wonder if you know that you should make your stand clear.

I wonder if you know I don't like you saying "anything".

I wonder what you say is true.

I wonder if you know its bugging me so bad.

I wonder if you realise there's something wrong.

I wonder ; I wonder ; I wonder.

I wont let my heart rule my head. Vice Versa.

2008-07-29T17:49:00.001+08:00

Yesterday ;

LP came over in the morning. Supposedly to do English project.In the end; all I did was compile the zoo pictures into power point slides.Oh ; we took pictures ; together((:

I'll post one at the end of this okay?(:

Then we left my house at about 12.25pm.LP went to Lot 1; I went to the mrt station to meet Joey ; to go for training together.

I AM SO SORRY JOEY FOR MAKING YOU WAIT SO LONG ; I REALLY AM SORRY:(

Training was kinda sufferous ; if there is even such a word.I had to go to the toilet twice while running the rounds.Then coach made us run a lot more ; made me feel puking.& so yesterday ; I made up my mind.

To say Farewell to my team.

I dont want to suffer anymore ; since there's no use for training so hard.When my skills & stamina DONT improve & I cant contribute to the team by sitting on the bench while you guys are on the pitch "battling" with the opponents.Plus ; there's training on saturday ; which kinds of clashes with church.

&& I just cant seem to fit into the team some how.

Always after I say something ; there's this silence as if no one's listening.

Or rather ; I cant seem to fit in anywhere.Except maybe in church ; I think cause I'm really new at church so they haven't seen my bad points.It seems that everything I do seems to get onto people's nerves in one way or another.

& SO ; PLEASE PEOPLE; TELL ME WHATS WRONG WITH ME?

If my attitude sucks ; tell me so.

If I'm too serious ; tell me so.

If I'm too clingy ; tell me so.

Cause I really dont know what stuff I do wrong.

Oh ; my cousin & my aunt came to visit last night too.My aunt apparently flew back from Dubai only on Thursday. My 21-year old cousin actually took my phone & skimmed through my smses.& he was like " If these people harass you ; tell me. I'll go whack them."

HAHAH ; SO PEOPLE BE CAREFUL. HAHAH.

Today ; had physics test.

I think it was quite horribly done. But whatever. I wasnt good in physics all along. Though I wont give up as yet. I'll still see if I can get into triple science ; though I much prefer Chem & bio.

During PE ; we had volleyball practice. We had this mini volleyball test & I scored 4/5(:

OHH ; I got back my chinese test paper today too. I scored 40.5/50(((: & there was a star beside the marks. hahah.

Today; after school waited for Janeen for practically 45 minutes.

& so yah ; I skipped lunch. Cause after meeting Janeen went to Taka to meet LP. Meet only. Cause when I reached there already ; they had already finished shopping for whatever they needed. On bus 700 ; talked to LP. She's got a new crush now ; poor maomao. hahaha.

OKAY ; need to go take a shower & then start on my homework.

CIAOS(:

CHEER UP; LP. I'LL ALWAYS BE THERE TO WIPE OFF YOUR TEARS.(:

THE COUPLE((:

2008-07-25T21:28:00.003+08:00

Today ;
Helped out at Radin Mas Primary School's sports day which was at CCAB.
I took bus 170 to CCAB ; I didn't know which stop to alight & I kept looking out of the window trying to look out for CCAB.
I called Clara to ask if there were any significant things near the bus stop ; she said no.
Then this really nice Hwa Chong girl who was sitting beside me ;
she went :" Are you going to CCAB?"
Then she told me directions. She's SO SWEET ; I tell you.
Praise be to God for answering my prayer.((:
I prayed & asked for God to send someone to help me find me way to CCAB.((:

While we were at CCAB ; I was scorekeeper most of the time & umpire(referee) for 1 game.
Some of those young girls CAN play hockey; can sweep well, can dribble well.
Then at about 11 ; the lightning alert was sounded.
So everyone went into the indoor volleyball courts; and just sat around.
The hockers just sat the back ; we slacked ; napped a bit & stuff.
OH ; we watched a basketball game too.
There was this guy from Bukit Merah sec I think.
He was so action ; gosh.
Act so pro but all his shots never go in.
S-T-U-P-I-D.
NOT GOOD THEN DONT ACT ACT LAH.
AHAHAH ; JOKING JOKING. NO OFFENCE.

After the event ; we went to eat at Mr. Prata with Coach.
I ate a honey prata ; a tissue prata with chocolate & drank a glass of ice lemon tea((:
After lunch; Jeralyn, Clara & I went back to school to take our math test.

Boy, it was so hard.
I'm not being pessimistic or whatever ; but I know I'm bound to fail AGAIN.
sighs. I didnt even have time to pray before the test.:((

After the math test; went to Ikea to meet Bel ; Jie'r & Wen Qi.
They were there to buy cups for their PBL thingy ; I was there to extra.
It was a relatively nice time.
After paying up, Belinda & I cabbed to BPP cause she had an urgent need for the toilet. hahah.
After that ; she was hungry so she bought a packet of fries from Macs & we kinda shared.
After that I went home.

Saturday ;
Learning festival cum speech day.
I woke up at 5.30pm to prepare to go to school.
I missed 307 & 190; so had to wait.
In the end; didnt get to take 132 with Bel as planned. OH WELLS.
I reached late but still managed to be of help to Ms Sim.
I had CIP hours & a hotdog bun for helping((:

The learning festival was boring ; walked around ; eat food ; watch some performances.
I wanted to leave early to go for church but Ms Sim dont allow. :X
In the end ; i rushed off after the event in a cab to church.
I didnt know what church's address so I called Jonas Ng to ask.
Then he said " Last row."
Then I was like "What road? What road?"
Then he said " Last row."
Then he sounded confused & passed the phone to Charmaine I think ; then she also blur blur.
Said they were sitting at the last row.
I dont understand which part of R-O-A-D they dont understand.
haha.
In the end I still found my way.
My mum asked me out earlier than supposed ; HATE THIS FEELING OF LEAVING IN THE MIDDLE.
So I didnt get to sing any songs on Saturday. :(((((

Today ;
went to Lot 1's Yakun Kaya for breakfast(:
Then our family went to shop at NTUC;
we bought a lot of stuff.
Then came home & studied.
Went for tuitions as usual; but had to make my way to chinese tuition myself.
My dad went to airport you see.
He left on a airplane to Sans Fransico(however you spell it).
He'll be gone for a month; a whole month.
I'M MISSING HIM ALREADY ; I'll lose my math teacher ; my chauffeur ; my great daddy!

Dry all your tears ; pick ourselves up.

2008-07-23T22:06:00.002+08:00

We played the game ; we lost 1-nil.
We cried together ; cause the champions' gone.
They won us ; oh they didnt deserved to.
They pushed; they shoved; they hit high balls.
They were walking ; trying so much lesser than we did.
Yet; the biased umpires made the day go haywire.
When they were handling the ball near the line & the ball went out; the whistle wasnt blown.
But yet when we had the ball near the line & it WASNT out ; the whistle was heard.
The high balls never once they were considered files;
the shovings so tremdous ; "watch your hand" was all that was heard.
Maybe it wasnt them to blame ; cause it was true we werent up to standard in the first half.

We scarificed so much ; time, effort, energy, money, sweat, tears even blood.
We've got injuries ; but we stood up again.
We always had little time to complete our homework ; we still managed to hang on.
We were very very tired; those 10 rounds & sprints.
We spent money, cabbing to training areas, buying drinks.
We cried ; cause we won or lost or were in pain.
We bleed ; cause of injuries ; cause of the pain we feel inside.
As a team we done so much more than any other team ; & yet, we still couldnt overcome the challenge God has posed.

God's making us stronger ; teaching us important lessons.
Yes; I was praying so hard during the game ; I almost wanted to fall on my knees to pray.
I asked "WHY?" when we lost.
I dont blame God ; not even a single bit.
These times maybe sad ; but He'll guide us to move on.

I'll remember the fond memories ; when we helped each other tie our 2 pony tails.
I'll remember us cam-whoring at the basketball court.
I'll remember us crying together as a team.
I'll remember us singing our team song.
I'll remember us cheering together.
I'll remember everythign we've done TOGETHER; as a team.
In my heart ; there'll only be one team, the best team ; the only team that has their players wearing yellow jeserys, blue skirts & 2 ponytails.
THE CRESCENT HOCKEY TEAM.
I LOVE YOU; & I ALWAYS WILL.

UPSET STOMACH.

2008-07-21T10:03:00.002+08:00

HAVING AN UPSET STOMACH.
I keep running to the toilet. URGHH.
SICKENING.
Last afternoon & evening was feverish.
I ate a Panadol Extra pill & the fever went down.
However ; I realised my stomach didn't feel well last night.
Didnt really know the cause till this morning.
Wanted to go to school still ; but in the morning realised had diarrhea.
So didnt go to school in the end.

Last night was terrible.
Couldn't sleep.
Felt cold though the air con was 25 degrees.
I was wrapping myself in the blanket; hoping I'll feel less cold ;
but it didn't work.
My brain kept thinking ; all the thoughts mixed together.
I cant remember what thoughts they were ;they were like fragments of everything.
It was so tormenting.

Yesterday during tuitions ; I couldnt concentrate since I was feeling feverish.
During math tuition ; I kept making mistakes.
Didn't know what I was doing.
During chinese tuition kept feeling like sleeping.
Read 二十课 as 二十四课 out loud.
My teacher was very nice ; she was like "你们不要吵慧琦；看她犹豫美人的样子。"
Even though I wasnt feeling well ; I still smiled.

Have a match against St Nicks on Wednesday.
Hope will recover ASAP.
Though I know I wouldn't get much chances to play ; I still want to be in tip-top condition.
I don't want to let the team down in any way ;though I'm not a star player or whatever;but everyone is part of the team.
The C Division Crescent Hockey team.((:

WE'LL SHOW THEM THE CREZ SPIRIT; WE'LL SHOW THEM WHAT WE'VE GOT.

Tiring day.

2008-07-19T23:01:00.003+08:00

Today was a tiring day.
Woke up at 6 to prepare for training.
Went back to sleep @ 6.25 till 7am ; before leaving home.
Reached school at 8 ; had theory till 9.
Did basics at the basketball court for a while ;
then left school & took a bus to DSC.
Had training at DSC till noon.

Rushed from DSC to red hill MRT station.
Practically was rushing through everything ;
bathed exceptionally fast ; ate fast ; packed my bag fast.
Managed to make it to church at about 1.45.
We played monkey for a while before going upstairs.

We started off by breaking up ourselves into groups ; holding hands & praying.
Charmaine helped me pray; prayed that parents would let me go to church every week & prayed that God would help me through my studies.((:
Most of them could speak in tongues while they prayed.
Its really amazing ; I would say.
Though I was afraid of it when Jonas first demonstrated the gift of tongue.
BUT not anymore((:
&&; is it my palms or do you have sweaty palms? AHAHA.

Then we sang songs!:DD
Quite a few slow ones today ; clapped ; raised hands & all.
We raise hands to surrender ourselves ; our lives to God((:
Of course we clapped & jumped during the fast songs.
Missed the clapping rhythm quite a few times.
It was quite hard to jump when there are chairs behind & in front of you.
so was trying not to bang into the chairs & had to keep up with the beats too.

After a long while of songs;
Brother Ri Xiang talked to us about integrity ; reputation ; character.
All very important & useful things.
Took down notes; need to go buy a hard cover notebook JUST for church((:
After Brother Ri Xiang talked ; we broke up into smaller groups this time to pray.
I was with Adina & Wan Lin.
I didnt pray for Adina & Wan Lin cause I didnt really know how.
They speak really fast.
& Wan Lin's mind blanked out half-way through the prayer. :S

After the prayer ; sang songs to end service.
Left half-way through one of the song. :XXX
My mum said my dad was approaching.
Felt so bad. :XXXXX

My dad sent my brother & maid to the special gym & my mother; sister & I went to J8 to get some food before going to the library.
I wasnt really studying at the library.
Was catching a few winks of much needed sleep. XD
Dad came to pick us up at 6.
Went to KRGH for dinner.

You know ; was climbing down a flight of stairs before dinner.
Tripped on some metal thing & I almost fell down the stairs.
LUCKILY ; I didnt.
Or else I dont know what would have happened to my head or face or arm or leg or neck. IN SHORT; ME.
PRAISE BE TO THE LORD ; was what I immediately said.
If He didnt save me ; I'll be lying in hospital now.

After dinner ; did some work ; watched a little TV ; talked ; ate snacks & drank drinks.
Left the place at abt 9 ; came home bathed & used tablet.

Going to study the whole day tmr.
Since I didnt really study today.
Plus ; my dad's going to work in Sans Fransico ; however you spell it ;
FOR 1 MONTH.
So ; need him to teach me stuff in advance before he leaves.
Gonna miss him :((

TWISTS & TURNS.

2008-07-18T16:36:00.005+08:00

HEY HO.

WEDNESDAY;;
HAD ORAL & CHINESE TEST.
They went smoothly ; with the help of God.
I prayed before oral & test.((:
Of course those werent the only times I prayed that day.
I realise that actually people know that He's always there ;
just that they turn to Him only in times of need.
Like praying JUST before exams.
Which shoudlnt be the case at all.

Although the class was spilt into half for oral ;
I was still register 39 ; so had a pretty long way before my turn.
So; while I was waiting ; borrowed coloured pens & paper from Lynn to..
PRAISE THE LORD((:

PEEKCHURS:

I dont know if you can read what I was writing.
I wanted to use the coloured pens to write the word "Jesus" huge & beautifully;;
But I screwed it up. Felt so ashamed of myself.
SO decided to write sentences & phrases instead.((:

Thursday;;
Had training.
Coach wanted us to run 16 rounds at first. *Gasps*
Its a lot btw.
4800 yards ; non-stop okay.
Which is close to 4.8 km.
Ended up running 3 rounds.:DDD
Training was kinda short ; time seemed to pass very fast.

OH && IT WAS MY LOOKALIKE'S BIRTHDAY.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY; SERENA(((:

&& THANKS LYNN FOR THE BELATED BIRTHDAY GIFT((:
LOVE THE NECKLACE.<333

TODAY;;
Had geog test.
It was relatively easy I would say. Sure pass.((:
Oh; during music class today ; my teacher mentioned abt a short dance clip we watched last week.
It was 4 african men dancing in a beam of light shining from above & occasionally stepping out & stuff.
Then my teacher said:" At least so far ;no one has given weird reviews like Its God, shining down a beam of light onto them & blah blah blah"
Some of my classmates laughed ; & I was like "Eh, its possible hor."
Then Zehra & Jeralyn laughed & said I was cute.
HAHA ; dont know why they said that ; but will still take it as a compliment.((:

Watching Forensic Heroes II now.:DD